“Catch any that get away,” he whispered.
Cole picked up a rock from the stream and threw it at the bush. The trout began scrambling out from under it, heading towards him. He launched the
massive silver net. It flew through the air before it landed and trapped six adult
trout. They snapped their teeth and slammed their black and pink bodies against
their captor.
Several small gray baby trout scurried towards the area where I waited.
Quickly, I lowered the net and covered them. When several escaped, I rapidly shoved them back under the net with my boot.
The net confused them, and they began circling. “Cole! What do I do now?”
Cole laughed and came towards me. The net over his shoulder held two large
trout. Each was over a foot long and no longer moving. The ones selected to live were now scrambling into the underbrush. They were probably going deep into
their holes to wait for the danger to go away.
As he walked, Cole threw a trail of crumbs from his sandwich behind him.
When he was about ten feet from me, he said, “Lift the net now. The little ones
need to go back to their nest to grow.”
I lifted the net and watched the grey babies scamper back to their home,
stopping along the way to gobble the crumbs Cole had dropped.
“This should be enough to feed us for months,” Cole said and handed me the
net. The net was at least thirty pounds.
“Shouldn't I have watched you decide which adults to let go and how to…
you know?” I asked, uncomfortable with the thought that the trout were living just minutes before.
“You know this is crazy.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me close. “You
won't ever be without me. There is no need for you to prove you can do this. I
promise I will always take care of you.”
He leaned in and slowly kissed me. Quickly, the gentle kiss became harder
and more demanding. Wanting to be consumed in the feeling, I kissed him back,
slowly running my free hand up and down his spine. Cole abruptly pulled away,
taking the net from me. I sighed in frustration. How quickly he can abandon me,
I thought bitterly.
“Come on, Mar. Don't be mad. It's getting late, and Gram will worry." Cole
kissed my hand.
Once again, he chose to be practical over being consumed by passion. I
couldn't help feeling disappointed. I removed my hand from his grasp.
"Don't be like that." Cole brushed his lips against my cheek as he whispered,
“We wouldn't want Gram to think I'm not a gentleman, would we?”
I nodded and wiped the scowl from my face. The way Cole always
considered my grandmother's feelings was one of the things that made me love
him. However, sometimes, I just wanted to get lost in the moment. For just a second, I could feel all fear and doubt fade away while lost in his embrace.
As we walked back, hand-in-hand, to deliver our catch to Gram, I suddenly
felt a lingering sense of dread wash over me. Forever promises never seemed real. The dark feeling did not make sense to me. I had spent the day with the man I loved and trusted. How could I feel forever was possible one minute, wanting to be swept up away, and then allow myself to drown in the nagging sense that anything I loved would be lost the next? Must I always destroy things
