I feel like the weight of the world has just been lifted off my shoulders, relief washing over me in a sweet wave. I pull Mads into a tight embrace, squeezing her as hard as I can. She returns the gesture, her arms coming up to my back almost wonderingly, like she’s just been woken up from a deep sleep. “Mads,” I say, finally pulling back to look her in the eyes. “Do you…?”
She swallows and nods, her eyes already shining with tears. “I remember…” Her voice trails off, and her eyebrows furrow. “I remember Eenta,” she says slowly, as if she’s wracking her memory. “She…they…did something to me, back at the castle. Oh my god,” she says, her eyes going wide. “The fight—the sword—I… Karma, I’m so…”
“Hey, it’s okay,” I assure her, smoothing some matted white hair out of her face. “You weren’t you.”
“It’s all still a little hazy,” Mads admits, shaking her head slowly, “but I remember you. I remember my job, and your family, and…” She freezes, her whole body stiffening. “Peyton,” she breathes, meeting my eyes frantically. “Peyton, he—we—”
“I know,” I assure her, keeping a hand on her shoulder to steady her. “It’s all right, Mads. He’s fine. They’re all fine.”
“Thank god,” she says, burying her face in her hands. “I said so many horrible things to him. To you. Karma, I’m so sorry.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” I insist. “They wiped your memories, Mads. We were starting to think we would never get you back.”
Mads hesitates, staring down at her bound hands like she’s never seen them before in her life. “Not just the memories,” she says in a low, scared voice. “They did something else to me, didn’t they? Magic.”
I bite my lip, unsure what to tell her. “Yes,” I reply at last. “They gave you magic. They actually…” I take a breath. “They made you into one of us. A goddess.”
Mads swallows hard, looking like she’s going to be sick. “Why would they do this to me?”
“They needed a puppet,” I reply, shrugging. “And they needed leverage. To them, you were both. But you’re safe now, Mads. You’re here.”
“But I can’t be a goddess,” she protests, sounding panicked. “I’m not like you, Karma! I’m just a person. There’s nothing special about me. You were always the special one.”
“That’s not true,” I tell her. “You’ve always been special. They’ve just…made you a little more special, that’s all.”
Mads chuckles dryly, leaning back against the windowsill and raking a hand through her hair. “Just so you know, Karma, I didn’t sign up for any of this.”
A relieved burst of laughter bubbles out of me. “There’s that snark,” I say, straightening up. “You’ll be back to your old self in no time.”
“Do you think we can get rid of it?” she asks, looking up at me. “The magic? Can they reverse it?”
I would be lying if I told her it’s not something I’ve wondered since touching the orb. Truth be told, I didn’t sign up for any of this, either. I feel like my body isn’t my own anymore, like I’ve been shaped and reshaped by the higher gods so many times that I’ve completely lost track of who I am and what I want. I can only imagine Mads is feeling the same thing, and a surge of pity wells up in me. Tears spring to my eyes, unbidden, as I look down at my best friend—weak, confused, afraid, nothing more than a pawn in the gods’ eyes. “I don’t know,” I reply at last, my voice breaking, even as I say the words. “To tell the truth, I wasn’t even sure if you would remember me.”
“I didn’t,” Mads confesses. “Not for a long time. I felt like I didn’t know anything, you know? Like nothing was sure, and all I had to go on were the higher gods’ words. They made me think you were the enemy. They brainwashed me.” She begins to tremble, her hands balling into fists. “Those bastards,” she hisses, her blue eyes going icy. “Those fucking bastards.”
“You took the words right out of my mouth,” I agree, giving her a grim smile.
“It feels like it’s coming back to me all at once,” she admits, biting her lip. “A bunch of bits and pieces, but the important stuff, at least…” She meets my eyes. “Thank you, Karma,” she says, sounding like she means every word. “You saved me.”
“You saved yourself,” I reply. “You were the one who remembered. I just gave you a little push. How are you feeling?”
“Hungry,” is Mads’s immediate reply.
It’s enough to make me laugh. “I think we can remedy that. Let’s get you out of this room, yeah?”
“Please,” she says, looking relieved. “I was getting so sick of looking out the window.”
Together, we make our way out of the room, my heart still fluttering with relief. Mads is back. I got her back. She’s traumatized, and her memories still aren’t all there, but she’s back, and she’s safe with us. Gods, I hadn’t realised just how much I missed her. There’s a lot we’ll need to catch up on, but one thing at a time.
I kick myself when the door closes behind me, and I look down to see that her hands are still bound. “Shit, sorry,” I mutter. “I almost forgot. Here, let me see your wrists…”
Mads holds her hands up obligingly, allowing me to begin to work at the mechanisms of the magical cuffs with hands that still aren’t completely steady. I feel dazed, and it takes me a great deal longer than it should have. I can feel Mads watching me as I work, and when I glance up at her, I see that her brows are furrowed as she stares down at my hands. “Tattoos?” she asks, raising an eyebrow. “I didn’t figure you for the type, Karma.”
“Yeah, me neither,” I reply dryly, finally snapping the cuffs off my friend’s wrists and shoving them into my back pocket. “They weren’t exactly my choice.”
“What do you mean?”
I sigh. I was going to have to explain what happened sooner or later, I suppose. “A lot has happened since you…since they changed you,” I confess, a little hesitant to look her in the eyes.
“What’s wrong, Karma?” she asks, all regard for her own situation vanishing in an instant. It’s so selfless, so like her, that I find myself blinking back tears before I even realise it. “What happened?”
“They changed me, too,” I reply in a whisper.
“Xur? Eenta?”
I shake my head. “Neritous. He kidnapped me, brought me to his warehouse.” I look up at her, my voice not entirely steady. “There were others there, other kids. My siblings. And Ruby.”
“That cat shifter’s daughter?”
I nod. “She’s here now, but…she was the only one to make it out.”
“What are you talking about?”
I sigh, running a hand through my red curls. “I’m sorry. I’m not making sense. Neritous threatened her. He needed cannon fodder to test against Storm’s mother’s magic. He was trying to find a way to give us her powers. He made me do it, and…” I glance down at my hands, the vine tattoos seeming to mock me.
“You got her powers?” Mads seems taken aback.
“That’s not the worst of it,” I breathe, hardly daring to admit to the next part. “He made me attack a city in the U.S. He’s gone completely insane. I didn’t have a choice.”
