He kept at me.
“And last night, because I was a fuckin’ dick, I didn’t have you in my arms. I didn’t like that. Even when you thought we were fuck buddies, you gave me that.”
Oh God.
“Ren,” I whispered.
“You want this. And what you want to do means so much to you that you would let me be who I am, look into accepting my faith, love me that much, but walk away. Then you take that hurt so deep, you’re on autopilot, lettin’ out the woman inside you hold close and only dole out occasionally, but give to me. And you do shit like kiss Smithie to say hello when you never would do that shit. It means that much, then you can have it. And me. I’ll worry, but I’ll learn to trust you. All I ask is, when you got my babies inside you, you take cases you know are safe, and once we got kids under our roof, you proceed with the same caution. You with me?”
“I… are you… are you saying…?” I took in a breath. “Are you saying that you’re okay with me starting a private investigations agency?”
“No. I’m not saying that. I’m sayin’ I’ll work at it and try to be.”
Oh God.
I couldn’t stop it. A tear slid out of the side of my eye.
Ren’s hand finally moved from my jaw so it could cup my cheek, but his thumb kept moving in order to sweep away the tear.
But his eyes never left mine as he whispered, “I love you, Ally. I was pissed and worried. Lucky said you had a gun on you and that undid me. You not callin’ and tellin’ me that shit was gonna go down didn’t make things better. You came home and were immediately cool. I was not in a place where I could be cool so I was a dick.” He dipped his head, his mouth touched mine and he kept his lips there when he finished, “I’m sorry, baby.”
Yep. Not only was this happening; it happened.
I hiccoughed back a silent sob and shoved my face in his neck.
Both his arms closed around me. They did this tight and I felt this jaw press to the side of my head.
He was going to give himself to me at the same time take me as me.
This.
Was.
Righteous.
Oh shit.
This was a disaster!
I took two deep breaths to pull myself together, but kept my face firm in his neck when I started, “Uh… Ren—”
“Smithie’s got an issue and you’re dancin’ for him,” he stated matter-of-factly.
I blinked against his skin.
Then I pulled my face out of his neck and stared at him.
He didn’t look happy. He didn’t look pissed, but he didn’t look happy.
“You’re on that case and you come home from work, baby, I don’t wanna know,” he stated.
Was this Ren?
Or was there another dimension, and the Ren from that dimension slid through?
“Do you feel okay?” I asked and he grinned.
Then he said, “I shouldn’t. I got shit sleep. And last night, I also got calls from both your brothers, up in my shit.”
Uh.
Say what?
Ren kept going.
“Then I got a call from Daisy, up in my shit. This means I got a call from Marcus, also up in my shit. And this morning I got a call from Shirleen, again, up in my shit. And last I got a call from Smithie, tellin’ me you’re workin’ a case for him and he would not be happy if I got up in his shit. Then I hauled my ass over here to sort our shit. Now, you gotta call and let whoever know I’m gonna be at the rehearsal dinner tonight, because I missed dinner with my woman last night and that shit isn’t happening two days in a row.”
Our first semi-official date was going to Luke and Ava’s rehearsal dinner.
How freaking cool was that?
I didn’t tell him I thought that.
I muttered, “I best call Tod.”
“And don’t bother calling Daisy. She already sent your bags back to my place.”
God.
