“Why?” she asks, confusion etching her forehead. “What happened?”
I open my mouth, then shut it. Maybe the truth isn’t that easy. What the hell am I supposed to tell her? Gods, when did this all become so complicated?
“You can tell me, you know.” She forces a smile, and the hurt I see behind it makes me feel like total and complete shit.
“I know.” Lucky for me, we start up the steps, giving me a chance to think.
We reach the top, walking into the box canyon of the flight field, and my heart swells at the sight of the dragons organized in the same formation we stand at in the courtyard. It’s a beautiful, terrifying, humbling kaleidoscope of power that steals the breath from my lungs.
“This is never going to get old, is it?” Rhiannon says as we follow Ridoc and Sawyer across the formation, her smile overtaking her face.
“I don’t think so.” We share a look, and I break. “Xaden wasn’t honest with me,” I say quietly, feeling like I owe my best friend something true. “I had to end it.”
Her eyes flare. “He lied?”
“No.” My grip tightens on Mira’s letter. “He didn’t tell me the entire truth. He still won’t.”
“Another woman?” Her brows rise. “Because I will absolutely help you annihilate that shadow-wielding asshole if you guys were exclusive and he—”
“No, no.” I laugh. “Nothing like that.” We pass by Second Wing’s dragons. “It’s…” There go my words again. “It’s…complicated. How are you and Tara? I haven’t seen her around much.”
She sighs. “Neither of us has enough time for the other. It sucks, but maybe it will ease up next year when neither of us are squad leaders anymore.”
“Or maybe you’ll be wingleaders.” The thought makes me bite back a smile. Rhi would be a fantastic wingleader.
“Maybe.” There’s a bounce to her step. “But in the meantime, we’re free to see whoever we want. What about you? Because if you’re single, I have to say that a couple of the guys in Second Wing somehow got hotter after War Games.” Her eyes sparkle. “Or we could secretly visit Chantara this weekend and hook up with some infantry cadets!” She holds up a finger. “Healers might be all right, too, but I draw the line at scribes. The robes don’t do it for me. Not that I’m judging if that’s your thing. I’m just saying that we are second-years and our options for blowing off steam are endless.”
A random stranger might be what I need to flush Xaden out of my system, but it isn’t what I want.
She studies my face like I’m a puzzle that needs to be solved as we continue down the field. “Shit. You’re hung up on him.”
“I’m…” I sigh. “It’s complicated.”
“You said that already.” She tries to school her expression, but I catch the flash of disappointment when I don’t elaborate. “Mira have anything to say about the front?”
“Not sure.” I glance through the letter, reading it quickly. “She’s been reassigned to Athebyne. She says the food is only a step above our mother’s cooking.” That gets a laugh out of me as I flip the page over, but it dies quickly when I see the thick black lines that eliminate entire paragraphs. “What the…” I flip to the next page, finding more of the same before she signs off, hoping to fly over to Samara during one of my upcoming trips.
“What’s wrong?” Rhiannon looks up from her own letter as we continue walking, passing by Third Wing’s dragons.
“I think it’s been redacted.” I flash it at her so she can see the black lines, then look around to make sure no one else notices.
“Someone censored your letter?” She looks surprised. “Someone read your letter?”
“It was unsealed.” I stuff it back into the envelope.
“Who would do that?”
Melgren. Varrish. Markham. Anyone on Aetos’s orders. My mother. The options are endless. “I’m not sure.” It’s not a lie, not really. I slip the envelope into the internal pocket of my flight leathers and then cringe as I button up the jacket. It’s too fucking hot for these things down here, but I know I’ll be grateful for the extra layer in a few minutes once we’re airborne.
A red in the second row huffs a blast of steam in warning at a cadet from Third Wing who gets too close, and we all hurry along.
Tairn is the largest dragon on the field by far, and he looks completely and utterly bored as he waits for me, the metal of my saddle glistening against his scales in the sun. I can’t help but sigh in disappointment that Andarna isn’t with him as his forelegs come into view.
“Hey, has Tairn said anything about another black dragon in the Vale?” Ridoc asks me over his shoulder as we make it past Claw Section, coming to Tairn first, who’s standing in the lead position despite Rhiannon and Sawyer outranking me.
It’s all I can do to not trip over my feet. “I’m sorry?”
“I know, it sounds ludicrous, but when we walked by Kaori back there, I swear I heard him say something about another black dragon being spotted. The guy was practically jumping with excitement.”
“Tairn?” If the professor of dragonkind knows about Andarna, we’re screwed.
“Only a few dragons saw her before she entered the caves for the Dreamless Sleep. You try keeping her hidden and see how it goes for you.”
Awesome.
“Maybe it’s Tairn they’re seeing,” I say to Ridoc. Not a lie. “Or an elder?”
“Kaori thinks it’s a new one.” His eyebrows rise. “You should ask him.”
“Huh.” I swallow. “Yeah, I can do that.” Still not lying.
The three continue on, mounting their dragons.
Tairn dips his left shoulder for me but then straightens. “On your left,” he warns as a shape approaches from behind.
I whip around quickly to face the threat and secure my shields in place.
Varrish saunters toward me, his arms locked behind his back, and the major must be inhuman because there’s not a dot of sweat on his high forehead. “Ah, Sorrengail, there you are.”
