“Thanks,” I say.
She pushes up the seat. “I get shotgun.” I don’t argue, just climb in the back.
Jeremy clears his throat. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
He pushes his sunglasses up onto his head. Now all I can see in the rearview mirror are his dark green eyes on mine. I break eye contact, try and tamp down the feeling that this is all a huge mistake.
Gen gets in and we pull away from my house. I shift in the faux-leather seat, look out my tiny window. Decide that I don’t like two-door cars. No escape route.
No one says anything for a solid five minutes, until Jeremy reaches the highway.
Gen breaks the silence. “Oh good, I thought it’d be awkward.”
An exhale from Jeremy, and a wan smile from me.
A buzzing comes from the front seat. Gen picks up her phone. “Yeah?” A pause. “Not yet, Mom.”
I tense up. I’m fairly certain Gen didn’t tell her she was spending the day with me. Though it’s not like Mrs. Rodriguez can see me through the phone.
“I’m with Jeremy.” No mention of me. I was right. “I don’t know.” Another pause. “Yeah, I told you, I’ll do it later.” She sounds annoyed. “I know, Mom. I gotta go.” She hangs up.
Jeremy looks at her sideways. “She bugging you about college applications again?”
“Yup.”
“You should go. Especially if you don’t have to pay for it.”
“I don’t want my uncle’s money.”
That makes me still.
Gen only has one uncle. Ramsay.
“Ever since last fall, he’s been acting like he’s so much better than all of us. I’m surprised he hasn’t spent it all already on his fancy new car, and that trip he took over the winter with his twenty-five-year-old girlfriend.”
“It’s stupid not to take it if someone’s offering to pay,” Jeremy says. “No matter who it is.”
“I hate school and I suck at it.”
“You want to work minimum-wage jobs the rest of your life?”
“You can end up doing that anyway even if you go to school. Might as well get a head start.”
I try and concentrate on this newfound information, but I can’t help but notice the easy rhythm to their conversation, as well as the fact that they’ve apparently forgotten I’m here. I feel an ache deep in my chest. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.
Then I focus back on Gen’s words. “Where did he get the money?”
Gen’s head turns briefly. “An old friend left it to him. Some guy on the force.”
“Left him enough to offer her a decent amount toward any in-state school,” Jeremy adds. “And she’s being too stubborn to take it. Hey, Addie, maybe you can talk some sense into her?”
And the conversation unspools from there. Almost like we’re three normal friends again.
The highway flies by outside, and when I look at my phone, I’m surprised to see an hour has passed. We’ve hit a lull in our conversation, but it’s way less awkward now.
I want to ask Gen what proof she has that this money Ramsay got is from “some guy on the force.” But I don’t want to ruin this sort-of truce we’ve entered into. Plus, I’m not sure how she’d know.
“I’m sorry about Seth,” Jeremy says abruptly, into the silence. “I didn’t mean for it to be that bad.”
“What did you mean for it to be, then?” I ask. Gen’s sitting at attention now. But she must know what happened if Jeremy isn’t explaining it to her.
“I was just—pissed.” He takes a hand off the steering wheel, tugs on his hat. “I wasn’t thinking. My mom had just given me this car and I couldn’t even really enjoy it because I was still so pissed, so I just got in and drove and…ended up in the city.” A pause. “I didn’t have anyone to talk me out of it yet.” He looks at Gen, and something in that glance breaks my heart a little. “I didn’t mean to hit him that hard. Or I thought he’d fight back more, I don’t know. But I am sorry.”
I guess that’s the best he can do.
“I’m sorry, too,” I say. “For…Seth.”
A tight, quick nod. He doesn’t want to discuss it further. So I shut up about it.
Another lapse of silence.
And then I can’t help but ask: “So you guys are…hooking up, but not together?”
The back of Jeremy’s neck goes red.
“Whatever we are, you don’t have the right to be mad about it,” Gen snaps.