Connor and Eli had kept up appearances until the old bastard had driven off one of the winding Copper Ridge roads five years ago, drunk as hell, and nobody had been in the dark after that.
In so many ways, it was easier with their dad dead. At least they didn’t have to take care of him now, too.
Well, you did a terrible job of taking care of him in the end.
He shook that thought off. What the hell was wrong with him today? Sex against a wall and this stupid stuff.
He didn’t like reflecting on the past, and he wasn’t really sure why he was doing it now. Maybe just because today sucked like that.
But did it really suck? Because, be honest, you’ve never had sex that good.
No, he hadn’t. And that made it even worse.
Because no matter how bad of an idea he thought it was, he wanted more. The temptation to shove her down onto the floor, hook her legs over his shoulders and have his way with her had been way too big, which was why he’d stormed out of there as quickly as he could.
Because he didn’t trust himself. He almost didn’t know himself, and for a guy like him, that was a terrifying admission.
“Well, genetically,” Connor said, “I think we can all agree that other than in the looks department, we lost the parental lottery.”
Eli almost laughed at that since Connor was currently looking shaggy enough that it would take a very close inspection to decide whether or not he was good-looking.
“But seriously,” Kate said, “brothers are actually good for a lot of things. So...I’ve never felt like it was so bad.”
Eli cleared his throat. “Dammit, Kate, why’d you have to get all sincere?”
“You have to warn a guy, Katie,” Connor added.
“Call me Katie again, and I won’t say anything nice to you for the foreseeable future.” And it was all back to normal already.
Okay, he’d screwed up earlier. No denying that. And things were going to be weird for a while. And hard for a while, which was a potential double entendre Sadie would have enjoyed. But he still had Kate and Connor. And his run for sheriff. So most areas of his life were fine. He was just going to rope off that little disaster labeled Sadie and avoid it for the time being. Pay attention to the good and ignore the wreckage.
The incredible, mind-blowing wreckage.
He took a bite of pizza, even though he wasn’t hungry. Tomorrow he was back to work. And with any luck, that would help keep his mind off things he had no business thinking about.
* * *
Campaign signs and posters weren’t enough, it seemed. Not for the general election. TV ads and radio spots were needed. According to Lydia at least.
He knew those things were probably necessary, and he’d done some checking into it already, but there was something about the way Lydia talked about the election, filled with spark and enthusiasm, that made it seem like a very daunting reality.
Made him fear it was just too damn much to take on. The feeling he was sinking beneath a pile of endless work was one he’d had for most of his life, so it wasn’t new. But it didn’t mean he had to like it.
He ought to slap a campaign manager button on her chest and hire her right here in the coffee shop. But that would mean constant exposure to this level of energy and ideas, and he wasn’t sure he could handle that now.
Not with hurricane Sadie encroaching on his borders.
Eli was starting to think he needed to buy coffee somewhere else. But other than The Grind the closest place with decent caffeine was fifteen miles away and it wasn’t his usual assignment. And he basically had no reason ever to drive there for a latte, even when it meant avoiding Lydia’s too-keen eyes.
After what had happened with Sadie it felt exposing, and made him feel a little guilty. Which was stupid, because if Lydia was interested in him, he’d never given her a reason to be. And he shouldn’t feel at all like he’d somehow led her on.
But he did. And he felt even worse because she was helping with the Independence Day Community Whatever and because she seemed so invested in his campaign.
And if she found out he’d slept with Sadie...well, the help would likely be withdrawn from both endeavors. Which, when he thought about it, was more tempting than it should be.
“I think you should do a full-color spread,” Lydia was saying now.
“Excuse me?”
“Like...put your picture on the posters and the signs. I feel like you have the looks to really grab voters.”
“Is that...a thing?” he asked.
She smiled. “It’s always a thing. I mean, when you’re as kind and dedicated as you are, handsomeness shouldn’t matter. But it certainly enhances things. It’s part of charisma.”
He was so rarely accused of having that.
“Well, the other guy running certainly has a lot of good qualities, and has years more experience than I do.”
“He isn’t from Copper Ridge, though. And since this is the largest town in the county, that matters. They just work here. It’s different.”
It was in his mind, too. Man, it would be so much easier if he found Lydia attractive. Ferret-like levels of energy aside, she was pretty amazing. They could work together on his campaign, and hell, in spite of his gut opposition to a wife and family, he could eventually settle down with someone like her and they could be the unofficial king and queen of Logan County.
Too bad a stick in the eye sounded more appealing.
He looked away from Lydia, across the street, and saw a messy blond bun bobbing on the far side of the cars parked against the curb. And he knew, instantly, who the bun belonged to.
He’d avoided her for three days. Three days without seeing her and kissing her, or putting her up against the wall and banging her.
