good.
I had kept up my wanderings with Bain and Zahnin but now Zahnin was chatting. We didn’t have deep conversations where he bared his soul but he talked. He didn’t ask for advice or share how things were going in his cham but he did more than grunt unintelligibly at observations I made, he corrected my Korwahk and
he often waded in to try to explain when I was speaking with my people on the (rarer and rarer occasion) I was messing it up.
Daily, however, I went to his cham to attend Sabine. At my request, Diandra and Claudine had sought and found the other girl not of Korwahk who was hunted with us. She was Fleuridian too, her name was Anastasie and although her warrior had been gentler with her, without the assistance I had or Sabine was getting, she was still lost in a culture she didn’t understand and more than a little alarmed by it (she had not, for instance, been sheltered from the selection or the celebration after). With Narinda, Diandra and Claudine gave all of us lessons in Korwahk and often Nahka would come by, sometimes bringing her friends, and lessons would descend into girlie time with Diandra and Claudine translating. With this, it didn’t take long for laughter to ring from Sabine’s tent.
And this laughter was ringing once when the flaps slapped back and Zahnin entered.
Sabine did not scurry away but her eyes did snap to him. She held her body tense but not tight nor terrified, just guarded.
I counted this as progress.
He took in the scene then his eyes went to his bride and he asked,
“All is well, wife?”
Claudine interpreted and after a moment’s hesitation, she nodded.
Then Zahnin tipped his chin up to her, walked forward and executed a smooth move right in front of all her new girlfriends.
He ran the backs of his fingers gently across her cheek even as she visibly failed to fight back a slight wince.
He wisely ignored this and whispered, “This pleases me.”
Then, without another word or glance at anyone, he turned and walked out.
Nice. Very nice.
Sabine stared at the tent flaps in open-mouthed shock.
Diandra, Claudine, Nahka and even Narinda and I shared knowing and amused glances.
In our time with her, Sabine did not share how things were going and we didn’t ask. But Zahnin’s move made me hold hope that even if he wasn’t raised with kindness, he was the kind of man who was born with it.
I had heard and processed Lahn’s warnings but still, I couldn’t help it.
I was hopeful.
* * * * *
It became clear to me the night of the day of the rainbow that Lahn had settled his horde and therefore he came home much earlier. This meant more lovemaking. It also meant more chats, some of them heartfelt (for instance, when I told him stories of my father, his men, horseback riding lessons and the like), some of them informative (Lahn explaining things about Korwahk, how he spent his days, how I spent mine, me telling him how I learned how to play guitar (though, mention of another man in my life was not looked on favorably so I made a mental note not to do that again)), some of the chats were amusing and I realized my husband had a dry wit.
I also realized that he found me hilarious in a resigned way that, even if resigned, he felt it was appealing. He thought I was quite mad, I knew, with half the shit I did and said, the way my heart guided me, the easy way my temper flared, but he found it attractive and he didn’t hide it.
I liked that.
He even once came home in time to take dinner with me in the cham and as he did, I realized I’d never seen him eat. I also realized he ate a lot. He was a big guy and he had a big appetite. With the way he ate, how he kept that six pack was anyone’s guess. But I liked that he enjoyed his food and he did not hide it.
He was also gentle with me in many ways and took time and patiently began to assist Diandra in her teachings about the Korwahk and The Horde. He was king, he could do as he pleased
and expect to do it without being questioned and his people had lived their way of life for eons but I liked that he took the time to explain things to me.
Truth be told, I was beginning to like everything about Lahn.
And, stupid me, I did absolutely nothing to stop it.
* * * * *
I often spent time with Diandra, Nahka and Narinda but I did not broach the subject of my magic and my possible goddess status with any of them and they didn’t with me either.
I didn’t know why they didn’t but I didn’t because I was stupid.
And I didn’t because I wanted Zahnin to win his wife and Sabine, who was very sweet, to settle and find contentment and even happiness after what she’d endured. I wanted her to have what Mahyah never found. I wanted that a lot. And I wanted to do what I couldn’t do for Mahyah, and that was to help her have it.
And I also didn’t because I liked wandering the Daxshee, talking to my people, gabbing with Bain, exchanging comments with Zahnin, learning Korwahk, getting to recognize faces and beginning to share in the lives of my people, knowing who was sick, who was pregnant, whose son was to go before my husband in the next selection and the like.
And I also didn’t because I liked my nights with Lahn, our chats, our lovemaking. And I liked our mornings, his baths, sometimes my baths with him, the soft talks we’d have as he sat cross legged in front of me while I sat on the pile of hides and braided or bunched his hair and… um, our lovemaking (that was good enough to repeat).
Diandra was right and so was I. After Lahn hit me, he listened to what I said to him and inadvertently I had taught him a lesson at the same time he realized he had a battle on his hands and set about winning it. He had changed, sharing with me his time, his wit, his sweetness and his patience as well as his body and in so doing, he succeeded.
And he was enjoying his spoils for he knew from one look at me in the parade that I was what he’d been waiting for for years (he told me this during one of his heartfelt chats). And he now had it and he was not only content, he was openly happy.
And I liked that he was but further, that it was me that was giving it to him.
Therefore, I wasn’t broaching the topic of magic because I was actually enjoying being with the Korwahk, with my husband, with my friends.
This didn’t mean I wouldn’t kill for a burrito or a cell phone where I could call Diandra or Narinda rather than traipsing all the way to their chams with one of my guards in hopes they were home when I wanted company, but as the days went on, these longings faded, my memories of home faded and Korwahk became my reality.
