It was happening.
And with that thought it occurred to me that I was, again, blameless. I was innocent. The only thing I did was fall asleep. And I’d borne countless nightmares since that time, bouncing back from each stronger and stronger. I had been a good queen. I had been a good wife. I had been a good lover. I had given him everything. My body, my world, my love and I was carrying our child.
Fuck… this!
I dropped my hand, squared my shoulders and locked eyes with my husband as outside, just above our house, without either of us seeing it, a bolt of lightning rent the air.
“I know it sounds unbelievable,” I stated, “because it is unbelievable. Fantastical. Extraordinary. Bizarre. But it… is…” I leaned forward, “true! ”
He opened his mouth but before he could speak I carried on.
“Right here, right now, what you’re feeling, I felt too and it was probably a hundred times worse than what you’re feeling now, Lahn, because in my world, they do not hunt women and rape them.
In my world, if you do that, you go to jail for a long, long time.
Everything, everything, ” I threw out my hands, “was different. Your clothes. Your language. The landscape. Your homes, food, furniture,
shopping. And I don’t mean a little different, like here warriors wear hides and up north, they wear armor, I mean a lot different. In my world, we don’t ride horses, we drive cars. In my world, we don’t have chamber pots, we have toilets. We don’t have slaves. That was outlawed years ago. Most countries don’t even have kings or queens!” I was now shouting, lightning striking fast and hot outside our windows. “And if they do, they hold no power but are only figureheads.”
He glared at me, it was scary but I didn’t care. I was too far gone.
I just kept talking.
“I was terrified when I got here. I don’t even know how I had it in me to breathe much less move or speak. This doesn’t happen in my world, this changing of beings, me taking her place, her taking mine.
But I suspect powerful sorceress Circe had had enough at men’s hands, her king, those pirates, your scouts, and she knew what was about to befall her during your fucking Hunt as she stood in that pen or she found out and therefore she got the fuck out of Dodge! And when she left her world, she changed places with me. I had no control and I’ll tell you, Lahn, so many times in the past months, I wished, I fucking prayed to go back home because you and your people and your practices scared me and they sickened me.”
“It is unfortunate for you, Circe, that just from your words, I cannot know this is true,” he stated.
“Yes,” I hissed, “it is. And guess what, big guy, even I don’t know if it’s true. The only thing I know is that I’m here and she’s not.
That’s all I know. I’m just guessing.”
“And I am guessing, because even as we stand here, you command the heavens, that you wield extraordinary power. You have not hid it, it is at your command and since it is, I can only wonder what other power you have wielded for what other results.”
“It isn’t at my command, Lahn,” I flashed and threw an arm toward the windows which now flared with lightning and roared with thunder as the rain pounded down. “That’s happening and
everything that has happened is because of what I was feeling. And you,” I jabbed a finger at him, “fucking know it.”
“I also know that you say you were sickened by my people’s practices, but it didn’t take long for me to win you, did it, wife?
Three days you gave it before you were rubbing against my hand and rearing into my cock,” he, unfortunately, stated the God’s honest truth with that. “It has taken Zahnin’s wife months to yield to his endeavors to win her. But not you,” he threw an arm out toward me before locking it back across his chest. “No, not my golden bride, not only was she riding my cock, moaning while I drove it in her, she was offering to take it in her mouth if I gave up the Xacto, doing everything she could to keep me drunk on her charms while she manipulated me into capitulating to her whims.”
“That’s insane! ” I screamed on an accompanying crash of thunder.
“I did not take free woman nor slave while I plundered, Circe, because you demanded it!” he shouted back.
“That’s because it was important to me!” I returned, just as loud.
“Yes, keeping me bewitched is indeed, for whatever reason, important to you. This, at least, I believe is true.”
I shook my head and went silent.
I couldn’t believe this.
This was unbelievable.
It was also heartbreaking.
Nope, I was wrong about that.
It was soul destroying.
I breathed hard through my nose and looked away, trying to calm myself as the thunder and lightning stopped but the rain continued to drive down.
Then I sucked in a huge breath and looked at my husband again.
And when I spoke, I did it softly. “I gave up a world for you.”
He glared at me, not giving me anything.
I kept right on going. “I thought, perhaps, when I learned I had powers, I might be able to use them to go home,” his eyes flashed but that was all I got so I kept on going, “but not for good. My father isn’t dead.” Another flash. “He’s alive and at home and living maybe with a fake Circe. He’ll know the difference, though, I know it. He’s out of his mind with worry, I know that too. He’s wondering where I am and if I’m okay and how to get me back. I also know that. I know that and I know that my life there was good. I loved my life. I loved my home. I loved my job. I had a lot of people who loved me that I loved back.” I sucked in breath and then whispered,
“But as much as your world scared me, as much as our practices repulsed me, I still chose you.”
His torso jerked, it was almost imperceptible, but I caught it.
I kept at him. “I gave up my world for you, Lahn. I sat at your side through things people in my world would find loathsome and I did it with my head held high. I even felt pride that I could endure, that I could be a good queen to you. I didn’t know how to be a queen but every day I walked amongst your people giving them my time and my ear and my attention, hoping that was what I was supposed to do. Everything I did in this fucking place, even before I fell in love with you, was for… fucking… you. ”
