“Yes, but I wasn’t nervous with you. Allegra’s different. She’s…” He stopped himself, trying to think of a way to say it that wouldn’t sound insulting. “I’ve always kept her on a pedestal.”
“I’d be happy to knock her off, if you think that would help.”
“You could try, but I think she’s out of reach. She’s way up there.”
“Why, Logan? Why would someone like you be fixated on a woman who doesn’t want you?”
He opened his mouth to respond, but his mind went blank. Why was he so determined to win Allegra’s affection? The truth struck him like a punch to the abdomen, as his stepdad’s harsh words blared in his memory.
Though Logan had shared more deep secrets with Ellery than he had with anyone in years, his stepfather wasn’t something he talked about. Only Josiah knew the whole sordid story.
Another red light brought their progress to a stop. Logan stretched and shook out his arms to cover his jitters. “In my circle of friends, winning Allegra would prove I was truly successful.”
“Haven’t you already accomplished enough to do that?” she asked. “If you really are a billionaire…”
He ignored her implication that he might not have as much money as he claimed. The idea amused him.
“My friends may not have billions of dollars, but their millions have more power. My money doesn’t raise my status with them. If I were with Allegra, I’d be golden.”
“What’s so special about her that she could make or break your image with…” Ellery let out a frustrated huff. “I’m just going to call them these people, because they certainly aren’t friends. Why would these people be so impressed with Allegra?”
Her assessment made him chuckle. “In this group, her parents are like the king and queen, and she’s the princess. Her dad is Duane Edwards.”
“The senator?”
“That’s the one. High society…the group we were in before my former stepdad divorced my mom. Marrying Allegra would’ve moved Mom and me back into that group.”
“You wanted to marry her to gain status? Do you even love her?”
“Of course, I do.” He gave a frustrated growl. Obviously, he hadn’t improved his communication skills in the last five years. “I know it sounds bad, but I don’t really care about the status. I’m trying to explain why she’s more of a prize than a normal woman.”
“Whatever you say.” Ellery’s head was shaking. “I hate to tell you, but bringing me to this wedding isn’t going to help your cause. I’m about as far from social elite as you can get. It’ll be like taking a mutt to the Westminster Dog Show.”
“You’re right,” he admitted. “Expensive dress or not, you’ve got way too much pride to pretend to be something you’re not.”
“That’s definitely not my style.”
Her voice wobbled. Had he hurt her feelings?
“I don’t mean that in a bad way. I’m saying they can’t touch you, because you don’t care what they think.”
Brake lights flashed in front of them, and Logan slammed the car to a stop, eliciting a frightened squeal from Ellery.
Her hands grabbed the armrests, braced for an impact that never came.
“Sorry,” he muttered. “I’m being careful. Would it be better if you were driving?”
“Ordinarily, it would be. But not in a strange city.” She relaxed her grip. “You’re doing great. I’m okay. Just a little nervous.”
“Listen, if you don’t want to go to the wedding, we can tell my mom you aren’t feeling well. I can drive you home tomorrow and skip the whole thing.” The idea was sounding more appealing by the minute, but not just because of Ellery. The closer he came to facing all his old friends, the less he wanted to do it.
She folded her arms over her chest. Though he couldn’t see her expression, he knew she was scowling.
“If you’ve decided you don’t want me to go, I won’t. But be honest. Don’t pretend you’re protecting me when you just don’t want me to embarrass you in front of your people.”
“No, you don’t understand. I don’t want you to fit in.”
“Really?” There was that skepticism again. Logan squirmed in his seat. It wasn’t a lie…not really.
“Originally, I did, when I was interviewing to hire a date for the wedding. But I could tell that would be impossible before I even asked you to come.”
“Then why, pray tell, did you invite me? Am I a curiosity to entertain your friends?” Her sarcastic tone betrayed her hurt.
“Nothing like that. You let me know from the minute we met my opinion of you was of no consequence. You’re totally self-confident.” He swallowed hard as he realized his reasoning might be insulting. “I thought, with you as my date, I could look like I’d moved on. Like I didn’t care what anyone thought. I don’t want to look like I’m begging to be readmitted to their circle...”
She went silent. He hit the button to increase the fan speed on the air conditioner, hoping to combat the sudden dampness of his skin. What was going on in her mind?
“But you still care what they think,” she said, her voice displaying empathy rather than anger. “You care about Allegra’s opinion. And I don’t believe you’re going to fool anyone.”
The liquid in his stomach turned to stone. “I’m trying not to care.”
“Are you still in love with her?” she asked.
“I guess so.”
But would winning Allegra back really solve anything? Somehow Logan wanted to gain back the dignity they’d lost. He’d already bought his mother a house twice as expensive as the one his stepfather lived in with his new family, and a diamond necklace worth a fortune. But it hadn’t brought him the relief he’d sought.
Maybe nothing ever would.
