He moved his hand up my leg. ‘No, but those leather trousers were sexy as fuck.’
I knew what the look in his eyes meant. And I was in the mood to let off some steam.
‘How do you feel about going somewhere and drinking something that isn’t out of a can?’ I held up my Fanta.
Daniel kept his hand where it was, squeezing. ‘Count me in.’
***
We chatted about mindless topics all the way back to Greenwich on the overground, even though both of us could feel that the air was charged. I might have been allergic to commitment, but I was not allergic to having a little bit of fun.
‘Yeah, we’re working on something new. An evolution.’ Daniel was asking about the future of Level, and I filled him in as I fished for my keys inside my bag.
‘It’s a good job you’re only looking for a fling.’ Daniel leaned against the front door whilst he waited for me to find them. ‘Sounds like you’re working overtime at the minute.’
He was right. Between the app and the wedding, time was tight. I’d spent many an evening in bed with my laptop and a glass of wine (even if I didn’t condone it for anyone else in the team). But it wasn’t just now; work was always full on. It was the reason Rory and Lottie had finally split – he hadn’t seen it coming, but the long hours had finally tipped her over the edge. He’d been gutted.
‘Oh, is that what this is?’ I laughed at his expression. ‘But yeah, it’s not for the faint hearted.’ I finally found my keys, jamming them in the door.
Daniel nodded. ‘I’m sure.’
I opened the door to see Rory on the other side of it, just about to leave. I froze for a second, like I’d been caught doing something wrong, even though he was the one at our flat unexplained. He looked like he’d been punched in the gut, but quickly rearranged his expression to one of mild interest. I knew this man like the back of my hand.
‘Hey Pen.’ He smiled at me, his lips tight. ‘Hi mate.’ He stuck his hand out in Daniel’s direction. ‘Sorry about the other week. I’d had a bit to drink.’
Daniel eyed his hand for a tense moment before taking it. ‘No harm done.’
Rory looked between the two of us, Daniel’s hand resting lightly on my waist. ‘Clearly. I was just leaving – see you on Monday?’
I nodded, exchanging another look with him. It was weighted. There was so much unsaid between us at the moment – what was going on with Daniel and me, what was going on with him and Maeve (even if he thought I was none the wiser), what was going on with our company – and part of me wanted to beg him to stay and ask Daniel to leave. I’d never felt this distant from him before. I sent him a telepathic message, willing him to understand.
He seemed to read my expression perfectly, because he reached out and gently brushed my chin with his thumb, leaning over and kissing my forehead, before confirming quietly ‘We’re good. See you at work.’
Daniel was staring at my forehead as Rory walked away, one eyebrow raised. ‘Marking his territory much?’
I scoffed, brushing off the incredibly misogynistic language. ‘I’m not anyone’s territory.’
‘Right. You know what I mean.’
I didn’t. I turned and watched Rory head downstairs, a pang of sadness settling in the pit of my stomach. Daniel was already taking his coat off and making himself at home.
26
As much as I wanted to make things right, I didn’t see Rory for three days after that. It was like playing a game of whack-a-mole, one of us always disappearing into thin air the moment the other needed us. I’d tried to catch him in the office, but due to a last-minute tech roadshow that Harriet had dragged him to, he’d evaded me yet again. We’d played rock, paper, scissors over text to decide which one of us would stay at the office and which of us would go on the road, but in a landslide victory my rock had overpowered his scissors three times in a row. I’d got to stay in the comfort of my own home and watch TV with a tub of Pringles, whilst he’d had to spend two nights in a hotel (not the punishment he made it out to be, given how great a hotel full English was). The office had been quiet without him, but we’d finally fixed the programming, overriding the bug and linking all users together in a huge web of Level. It was the kind of breakthrough that Rory should have been there for, all of us high from the rush of eventually cracking a code. By this point, I was practically aching to see him.
‘I’ll get it!’ I shouted it to no one in particular, rushing down Mum’s hallway to get to the front door and yanking it open.
‘Hey.’ Rory smiled, bunch of roses in one hand. ‘Long time no see.’ I fought the urge to squeeze him tight, gesturing for him to follow me down the hall.
‘Are they for me?’
He laughed. ‘If you play your cards right.’
I feigned a swoon.
‘Only kidding. You fixed the Level bug without me, and I can never forgive you for that.’ He kicked off his trainers. ‘They’re for Caroline. I’m hoping it’ll be a subtle hint that she can repay me in cake.’
I rolled my eyes and pointed to the kitchen, where Mum was holed away working. ‘She’d give you anything you wanted, you know that.’
Rory nodded. ‘I do know that. You’re not jealous, are you, Pen? I could get you an obnoxious bunch of roses and sunflowers instead if you’d like.’
It was the only acknowledgement of Daniel, and the last time we’d seen each other.
I rolled my eyes and pushed away the niggling feeling at the pit of my stomach. It was probably the yoghurt that I’d eaten two days past its best before.
‘Are you ever going to let that one go?’
‘Never.’ He left me, striding confidently into the kitchen even though he was beyond late for the tuxedo fitting going on in the living room.
‘Everything okay in there?’ I rapped my knuckles on the door and closed my eyes, not wanting to see more of my male relatives than I’d bargained for. ‘Rory just got here, he’s in the kitchen with Mum.’
I felt rather than watched myself being jostled, flinching at the surprise contact.
‘Does he think we all just sit around waiting for him to be free? Some of us need to be back at the hospital tonight.’ A pause. ‘Pen, you can open your eyes now. No chance of seeing Dad naked.’ Joe smirked when I warily opened them.
He was right, Dad was fully clothed and dressed to the nines. It still made me feel emotional sometimes, seeing him in our childhood home. The last time he’d been here was when Joe had finished his stint as a junior doctor, and Mum had thrown a party to celebrate – complete with cupcakes decorated to look like every part of the human body. And I mean every part. Her vulva cupcake had been particularly realistic.
‘To clarify’ – Dad swigged his Diet Coke – ‘at no point this afternoon have I been naked.’
