Maybe I shouldn’t touch him again, but it’s been impossible not to touch Bram for a while now, and tonight isn’t any different. I take one hand from the pole and reach out for his, trying to ignore the flutter of excitement when he instantly leans over to hold my hand between the horses. We’re smiling at each other as the tinny song plays, and considering the carousel is the only thing illuminated on Ever After Street, nothing is brighter than his smile.
I let go of the pole with my other hand and spread my arm out wide, letting the night breeze drift through my fingers. ‘I’m flying!’
‘Wrong movie. That’s Titanic and it didn’t end well.’
It makes me laugh so much that, never mind flying, I feel like I’m soaring, and it’s nothing to do with the up-and-down movement of the crankshaft the horses are attached to.
When the song ends and the carousel stutters to a halt, he asks if I want to go again, and again, and we’re on the fourth ride before I realise I have to do something. There’s magic in the air tonight. This is a big, important moment, and if I don’t do something, I’m going to regret it for the rest of my life. Bram says whatever he feels without hiding anything, and he deserves to know how special he is, without skirting around it or shying away.
This time, when the carousel has started moving and he walks back, I reach out and grab his hand before he can get back to his horse and tug him over to me instead.
‘You okay?’ He wraps a hand around the pole, right above mine so the side of my hand presses against the side of his.
I reach up and pull him down for a hug, and he slides one arm around me and keeps hold of the pole with the other hand, and the hug makes him laugh because I’m moving up and down while he’s standing still.
My mouth is suddenly dry and I have to wet my lips and swallow before any words will come out. ‘Thank you for tonight,’ I murmur into his ear. ‘This is spectacular. You are spectacular.’
I can feel his face shift as he smiles. ‘You missed the “nut” out.’
‘Yeah, that too, but no. I meant spectacular. In every way.’ I turn my head until I can press my lips hard against his cheek, and his breath catches. He pulls back just far enough to meet my eyes, silently asking permission to kiss me, and if the width of my smile wasn’t answer enough, my horse chooses that moment to glide upwards, smashing my lips against his.
‘I knew I loved this carousel for a reason.’ His words are pressed against my mouth as my hand tightens on the back of his neck and his fingers curl into my lower back.
It’s a soft, sweet, gentle kiss, nothing more than a press of lips on lips. I think we’re both nervous, both excited, and the fact that he’s standing still and I’m on a horse that’s moving up and down makes it… absolutely impossible to kiss properly. Our mouths are pulled apart and then rammed back together, but neither of us are willing to part for long enough for me to get off the horse or wait for the carousel to finish. Every time he makes a noise of disappointment and his lips chase after mine, and then find them when the horse unceremoniously pushes my face into his, until we’re both just clinging onto each other and laughing ourselves silly, and somehow it sums up our topsy-turvy Wonderland relationship so well that there couldn’t have been a more perfect first kiss.
‘Oh, thank God,’ Bram says when the carousel mercifully comes to a stop. ‘I can honestly say I’ve never had a kiss quite like that before.’
It feels good to feel so wanted that he can’t take his hands off me as I shift on the horse, swing one leg back over it until I’m sitting sideways and can wrap my legs around his body and pull him closer until we can finally, finally kiss properly.
This time, there’s nothing soft and gentle about it. My nails are digging into his shoulders, and he’s holding me so tightly that I can feel his heart racing. I get a thrill because every time my fingers graze across his skin, he shivers and goosebumps chase after every touch. I’m dizzy and it’s definitely not just from the four rounds on a carousel.
His fingers are digging into my body as he tries to pull me impossibly closer. He makes little noises of happiness against my mouth, and his tongue is hard, pressing, his teeth nippy, and I lose myself so desperately in giving in to the feelings I’ve been pushing down for weeks now that it feels like the ground under us is moving so much that we could be on a rollercoaster, not a carousel.
We’re both panting when we pull back.
‘Now, that was a kiss,’ I murmur.
Even his giggle sounds dazed. His forehead is resting against mine as he gasps for breath. ‘Am I awake?’
I blink my eyes open to see his are still closed and there’s a blissfully soppy smile on his kiss-reddened lips. ‘If you’re not, I’m not.’
‘Pinch me. Because I’ve been dreaming of doing that for a while now, and if this is a dream, the sooner I wake up, the sooner I can start getting over the disappointment of it not being real.’
‘I’m not pinching you!’ I love that, even in the middle of the best kiss ever, he still makes me laugh. I lean up and press my lips to his again and he sighs into it, his full weight resting against my horse like his body has completely melted.
‘The two hours I spent making that Reese’s cheesecake last night were worth every second.’
I laugh out loud. ‘Oh, Bram, you know how to make a girl feel special.’
He leans down and touches his lips to the corner of my jaw, just below my ear, still breathing hard. ‘So are we…’
‘Are we…?’ I repeat.
I love that even when we’re so close that I can feel the heat as his cheeks redden, he still blushes. ‘Are we… doing this? Are we in… this… together?’
‘I’m in if you are.’
‘I’ve been “in” since the day in the shop when my father came in, and you had every right to be angry, but instead you reached over and squeezed my hand. I’ve fallen fur-over-whiskers for you every day since then.’
‘Since the first time I came to your house and realised how different you were to the character you play. When we left to go to the supermarket and you tucked your hair under a hat because you didn’t want to be looked at. I realised we weren’t so different after all.’
When he kisses me this time, it’s a mix of the softness of the first time and the passion of the second time, and when we pull back, I’m light-headed and fizzy inside, desperate to kiss him again, to never stop kissing him, and I can’t help giggling about what anyone would think if they caught sight of us.
‘Never thought the best kiss of my life would be in the middle of the night while sitting side-saddle on a carousel horse, wearing Cheshire Cat pyjamas.’
‘I’ve never seen sexier pyjamas in my life.’ His fingers run up and down my outer thigh, teasing the fleecy material. ‘And the best kiss of your life, really?’
I smack at him.
‘Instead of giving me an ego, that gives me a challenge – to outdo myself every time I kiss you from now on.’ He kisses me again. ‘And just so you know, it was the best kiss of mine too. Even the split lip from the moving horse. I’ve never had a more enjoyable reason to buy Bonjela before.’
I cannot stop laughing. If I couldn’t sleep before, God only knows how I’m going to sleep after this.
I let him go long enough for him to restart the carousel again, and the tinny music of ‘A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes’ fills the night. Instead of getting on his own horse, he stands next to mine, stealing kisses every time it glides low and I cling onto the pole with one hand and don’t let go of his hand with the other, and when the music stops and the horses come to a halt, neither of us makes any attempt to move, and it’s by far the most magical evening of my entire life.
19
The Ever After Street castle is easily the most romantic place I’ve ever been. It’s such a real-life Disney castle that the only thing it’s missing is a pumpkin carriage parked outside. On Sunday morning, it’s decked out in wedding finery. Darcy is the gardener here and he must’ve been putting extra effort into growing pink and white roses because displays of them line the walkway and white rose petals cover the ground. In front of the castle is an archway made of brown willow branches interspersed with green foliage and pink and white roses, and inside, the castle has been decked with twinkling fairy lights, every pillar wrapped with garlands of roses, and sprays of wisteria hang from above.
