“I promise I won’t,” I said.

I reached over to hug him and when I felt his arms wrap back around me, I let go of an exhale that I had been holding in throughout much of that conversation. I would keep my promise and I wouldn’t give him any reason to doubt me or worry further.

Then, maybe someday far off in the future, if we ever decided that we wanted to have a baby, things would be better then and he would be more comfortable with the idea.

For now though, I was putting all thoughts of this ordeal behind me so that we could move on.

21

Tensions seemed to ease up that night after Michael and I had spoken in the greenhouse.

He seemed to be more relaxed and I was ready to close the distance that I had felt between us. Rob and Adam could see it too, and they seemed to be content hanging out in the cabin for the night while I spent an evening by the bonfire alone with Michael. We sat together, cozied up on the furs with filled wine glasses in our hands and a roaring fire that seemed to reach up past the tips of the trees on the horizon.

“We needed this,” I said.

Michael took a sip of his wine and pulled me closer against his chest as his arm wrapped around my shoulder and his fingers came down to rest on the top of my breast.

“I agree,” he said with a smile. “We really did. I’m not going to wake up to find you gone again this time though, right?”

“No,” I said, unsure whether to laugh at his tease or be swallowed up with remorse again.

He picked up on the hesitation in my voice.

“I was just kidding,” he said as he pulled me even closer still and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “Don’t feel bad. I shouldn’t have said that; I’m sorry. I was just trying to be funny and it failed gloriously.”

“No,” I said. “It’s fine. Honestly, if we didn’t joke around about some of this stuff, we would probably all go crazy.”

“There is one thing that is making me go crazy, though,” he said.

“What is it?” I asked as I turned to face him.

I didn’t want there to be anything else that could possibly ruin this perfect night. I just wanted one night where we could be together and reconnect after the pregnancy scare. But then, Michael leaned his face toward mine and when his mouth touched my lips, I melted.

I had missed him—this part of him—so badly.

His tongue slid inside my open mouth and I felt his hand lift the wine glass from my fingers before he set it on the ground beside us. I turned my body to face him as he came down over top of me, and I ran my fingers through his wild hair as my legs wrapped around his waist.

And when he lifted his head up for a moment, he grinned at me.

“This,” he said as he ran his hand up the side of my torso beneath my shirt. “This is what I have missed.”

I smiled and it felt like everything was right with the world again. I wanted another wonderful and passionate night under the stars with just the two of us again as happiness and arousal swirled around us in a palpable torrent that rode the mountain breeze. Only this time, after we made love by the crackling fire, we fell asleep in each other’s arms.

I would stay tangled up with Michael and wake up to look into his eyes in the morning.

This was my chance to erase the memory of leaving from my mind and to replace it with the memory of a wonderful night of lovemaking that ran right over into the morning. And I was determined as hell to overwrite that memory. Looking back on it made me sick, and I didn’t want anything we did as a couple to ever trigger that memory again. All I wanted was for us to focus on the good. For us to have good things to enjoy that overwrote the bad that we had all dredged through just to come out only partially scathed on the other end.

It was time for us to turn over new leaves, so to speak.

He gazed into my eyes as I laid there, enjoying the feeling of him against me. Michael was the only one that could cloak me with his body and make me feel safe, and I wasn’t sure why. His presence and his demeanor and his voice hit me differently than the other guys, and I had no idea why.

I had no idea why any of them affected me the way they did.

But, I loved it all the same.

“You know you wanna,” he said with a grin.

I giggled as I reached for his shirt. “Hold your arms up.”

He quickly flipped me over, causing me to straddle his lap, before he shot his arms into the air. We both laughed and enjoyed ourselves as I slipped it over his head, and when I looked down I saw that, somehow, he had already undone my pants.

“Uh huh. And when did that happen?” I asked.

Michael took his shirt from my hands and wrapped it around my waist, pulling me closer against him. “You really should pay more attention when I’m on top of you, you know.”

I dipped my lips down and breathed the air he afforded me. “Or, maybe you could simply explore all you want. How about them apples?”

His lips crashed against mine, answering my question as he discarded his shirt. We rolled over once more, my back planted against the ground again as my legs spread to accommodate his presence. His lips fell against my neck, teasing and sucking, while his teeth raked over my pulse point. And as I locked my legs around him, we both rolled around and undressed one another until there wasn’t an ounce of fabric blocking his body from mine.

Just how I liked it.

He pinned my wrists above my head with one hand and reached between our bodies with his other. I waited for the pressure. For the filling feeling of having him so close to me. But instead, his fingers parted my pussy lips and found that pulsing bud that his body always seemed to tickle at the exact right moment.

And as his fingers swirled around my swollen clit, my eyes rolled back.

“Oh, Michael.”

He released my hands and fell between my legs. “I need to taste you.”

My hands fisted his hair. “Shit don’t stop. Oh fuck, I love it when you do this.”

I didn’t even get a chance to catch my breath before his tongue pressed against my oversensitive nub. I rocked against him, feeling his tongue splaying out as his hands pressed my knees up to my chest. He held my legs up, effectively folding me in half as he devoured me whole. His tongue slipped into my entrance, caressing my walls as my body shivered. Goosebumps spread across my entire body and puckered my nipples to near-painful peaks. My hands fell away from his hair and I clawed at the ground, bucking relentlessly as his tongue teased my eager clit.

And once he pressed his tongue tightly against my pussy, I fell over the edge.

“Michael!”

He growled. “Come for me. All over my face. There you go, beautiful. There it is.”

He flipped one finger inside, and then two. He crooked them and stroked softly, causing my once-clenched eyes to fly open. He pulled the breath from my lungs with his fingertips as he played me like a fiddle, and I felt myself transported to an ethereal sort of plane. I felt weightless. Stressless. Like an angel floating away on a cloud up into the heavens. Fireworks burst in my vision, cascading slivers of silver as my body slowly climbed its way out of the clouds.

And when my vision cleared, I saw the most handsome face smiling down at me.

Until I felt a pressure at my entrance.

“Yes,” I whispered. “Yes, yes, yes.”