I held his eyes. He nodded, peeled off from Ren and Mace and disappeared out the door.
I approached Darius and Smithie.
“Stay back, Ally,” Darius ordered.
“Smithie,” I called, ignoring Darius, but Smithie’s eyes were already on me. “Calm down a sec. The cops are gonna need to talk to you. Then you can continue destroying your office.”
He threw out his hands. “What am I gonna tell ‘em? That I didn’t know dick?”
“They’ll have some questions, honey. Just tell them what you know,” I replied.
He leaned into me threateningly, and I saw Darius get close and felt the men at my back move forward.
“I can tell them what I know fuckin’ now. I know that motherfucker—in my own fuckin’ house—extorted fucking blowjobs from my girls.” He thumped his chest on the word “my.”
“Smithie—”
“Took their money.”
“Smithie, please, listen for a—”
“And they gave all that shit up, for me.” Another whack to his chest.
“I know, but—”
“For me!” he roared in a way that the entire room stilled.
He stood there, staring at me, breathing heavily, and I knew it was going to happen before it happened.
So I ordered quickly, “Everybody out.”
Then it happened.
His arms went to cover his face and head and his legs went out from under him.
I rushed to him, looking at Darius and mouthing, “Out.”
Darius nodded and moved.
I got down on my knees by Smithie and pulled his big quaking body in my arms.
“For me,” he whispered, his voice breaking.
“They love you,” I whispered back.
“For me,” he repeated.
I said nothing. Just held him in my arms.
This lasted a long time before, not looking at me, still curled into himself in my arms, he started to ask, “How do I—?”
“I don’t know,” I interrupted. “I just know you will.” I pulled him closer. “I’ll help.”
He dropped his arms and turned his head to look at me. My breath caught and my heart squeezed at the ravaged look on his face, his bloodshot eyes, the wet on his cheeks.
“They did that shit for me,” he said, and it sounded like he was pleading. Like I could take his words and make them and the fact that all this happened go away.
“They love you,” I repeated and lifted my hands to his cheeks, moving my face closer. “And that, Smithie, is a beautiful thing. You take care of them. They took care of you. It was awful how they had to do it. But every single one of them did it. That’s how much they love you.”
He shook his head, taking my hands with it. “I can’t fix this,” he told me.
“Everything can be fixed,” I returned.
“Not this,” he whispered.
“Daisy? Ava? Sadie?” I gave him examples of women who lived on, valiantly and magnificently, after being violated. I shook my head before I lifted up, kissed his forehead then looked back into his eyes. “Everything can be fixed. Everything.”
He held my eyes.
Then he nodded.
“Baby.” We heard, and I let Smithie go in order to turn around.
I saw LaTeesha rushing in.
I got out of her way, and as she helped Smithie off the floor, I gave them their privacy.
Mace was at the top of the stairs.
