He inhales deeply and runs his hand down his face. “I know you’re scared right now. I don’t want you to fear me, but I do want you to respect me. I want you to give me your body because you desire me as I desire you. I never wanted you to leave.” After a painfully quiet moment, he restarts the car.
I stare out the window, watching the houses and apartments zip by. I hurt Mikhail more than I thought I would by leaving.
And that hurts me.
Because I just want to make him proud of me. But I also don’t know how to give him all of me without losing a part of myself. And I can’t lose that part of myself. The part that is intrinsically me.
Mikhail pulls into the parking garage of our apartment building. “Here’s what’s going to happen. We’re going inside. You’re going to check in on your sisters because I know you’ll want to. And then we’re going into my play room, and I’m going to teach you another lesson. I will push your body in ways I haven’t before, Sofiya. You can, of course, say stop at any time. But if you want to feel better about leaving me, then you will do this. It’s the only way we can move forward. I will forgive you afterward.” He pauses, then says, “Your sisters will leave. I will not have them here causing issues. You are partly responsible for this. I am not angry with you. But I am disappointed.”
I flinch again. Hearing that makes me feel a million times worse.
“Now, we’re going inside. Are you ok with all this?”
Seeing as I have no choice? I am. I’m going to lose my sisters again, and that hurts more than anything. But I messed up by trying to leave, and I need to pay the price.
Mikhail opens his door, but before he gets out, I speak. “He didn’t touch me.”
He goes still.
“Andrei,” I explain. “He ripped my dress off, but then he made me lie on the couch. He didn’t touch me yet. I think he was … trying to savor the moment.” I shudder at the memory. The sight of his disgusting, lust-filled face looking down at me. “But he didn’t touch me.”
“Good.” Mikhail doesn’t look at me as he gets out of the car. “Now, let’s go inside.”
My legs tremble as I step out of the car, but they manage to stay strong enough to carry me inside, where my punishment awaits.
Chapter
Eleven
SOFIYA
My eyes meet Vik’s the moment I step through the door. “Are you ok?” I ask, rushing over to her and Mila.
“Are you?” Mila asks.
“I’m fine.” Technically, a lie. I am far from “just fine.” What Andrei did to me has left me shaken, and knowing Mikhail is going to punish me isn’t helping.
Mary stands behind my sisters like she’s a guard and my sisters are her prisoners. The glare she sends my way shakes me to my core.
Mila pulls me into a hug, and I don’t let her go until Mikhail clears his throat and tells me, “It’s time.”
I turn to Vik. “Make sure Mila is taken care of.”
She nods and opens her mouth to say something, but Mikhail is taking my hand and leading me away. I just hope I’ll get the chance to talk to them after Mikhail is through with me. This cannot be the last time I speak to them.
Mikhail takes me into his playroom. I stand still, clutching my ruined dress to my body. It reminds me of when I stood naked before him, holding my wedding dress to my body. I was scared of him then, and I’m scared of him now.
“Before we begin,” he says, facing me with his arms crossed, “I need to know. Why did you decide to leave, even after the punishment I gave you?”
“I already answered that.”
He frowns. Somehow, it makes him even more handsome. “I’m asking again because I didn’t like your answer. Tell me again. Why did you leave me?”
“I’m afraid,” I admit.
“Afraid?”
“Of you. Of this.” I wave my hand around to encompass the room and all the things in it. “Of us.”
“Why us?”
“Because you’re pushing me in ways no one ever has before. It’s scary. I didn’t want to lose my sisters, so I left with them.”
“But you had the option to let them stay if you gave your virginity to me.”
“I know.” I drop my eyes to the floor, breathing heavily. “But I’m not sure I can do that. I don’t want to be pressured into giving you my body. I want to give my body freely.”
“Nothing in this life is free, Sofiya. Not in the world I inhabit. Everything is a give and take.”
“But that’s not fair.” I almost feel like stomping my foot, but I resist at the last moment.
He raises one eyebrow. “Who said life is fair? You lost your father and have now found yourself in a position without any protection. But I give you protection. I will always make sure you’re safe. I did with Andrei today, and you ran into my arms. Don’t you feel safe there?”
“I do,” I blurt out.
“So, then, what’s the problem? You feel safe with me, but you don’t want to give yourself to me.”
“I know it doesn’t make sense, but that’s how I feel.” Both attracted and fearful of him.
