With this, Dairfyn jogs into the ocean and swims away, leaving me alone to confront Zhuliya and ask the truths she holds in her heart.

Just please don’t let them break mine.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Zhuliya

One second, Ilian is there, and the next, he’s gone. My head still spins with the memory of him covered head to toe in blood.

My tummy bunches at the thought, but it’s the anguish that was etched into his expression that really guts me. Through our bond, I felt his sorrow.

The early morning air hangs heavy with the scent of salt and damp earth as I wait for Ilian to return.

Before me, the sunrise paints the sky in hues of pink and orange, but I can’t enjoy its splendor.

Everything inside of me coils, tightened to the breaking point as I try to figure out what I want.

In the tempest of my thoughts, I find myself adrift on a tumultuous sea, the waves of confusion crashing over me relentlessly.

The very fabric of reality feels frayed, as if I'm navigating through the haze of an uncertain dream.

The question echoes in the caverns of my mind, its weight intensifying with each passing moment.

Every emotion—every connection—I've forged with Ilian threatens to overwhelm me with doubt.

How much of our profound bond is a manifestation of genuine emotions, and how much of it is a beguiling illusion?

I grapple with the elusive boundary between reality and enchantment, desperately seeking clarity in the chaos that swirls within me.

Out of nowhere, the haunting memory of my own parents’ love rises, taunting me with its purity.

Their love, marked by sacrifices and trials, casts a looming silhouette that now colors my perception.

Will I ever really have anything as profound as that—do I even want it?

I’m scared of not having someone, but deep down, I’m petrified of losing them. Of pouring everything I have into a love that will ultimately break my heart.

Can love withstand the inevitable trials that life thrusts upon it, or is it destined to eventually crumble under the weight of its own intensity?

Am I strong enough to withstand the fall when the world crashes at my feet?

Tears course down my cheeks, and I jolt when someone touches my shoulder. Whirling around from the rock I’m perched on, I expect to find Ilian.

Instead, it’s an Ithaqua I’ve never seen before. She’s similar in appearance to Aisyth, but unlike the vibrant glowing gazes I’ve grown used to, this Ithaqua’s eyes are vacant.

No color—just a pit of black that burrows endlessly into her skull.

I stutter in shock, scrambling back only to trip. The Ithaqua doesn’t say anything, merely holds her hand out for me to take to help me up.

“Wh-who are you?”

“They call me Ekana.”

The goddess of memories!

She leads me forward, her pace slow and steady as she links her arm around mine. Her fur is the same light gray as Ilian’s, and for the hundredth time, I wonder where he’s gone.

“You worry for him.”

“Do you read minds?”

“In a way. Every thought becomes a memory. Some linger, but most fade away. The more intense the emotion connected to the thought, the stronger it embeds into our psyche.”

“I don’t know what’s real.”

The dark abyss of Ekana’s gaze bore into mine. “Yes, you do.”

Her words, spoken so succinctly, unnerve me. “How can a love shaped by forces outside of my understanding be genuine?”

“Oh my child of the mortal realm, love is a tapestry woven with threads of authenticity and divine intervention. Has your heart not called out to your own god, praying for love?

It is the most divine connection one person can share with another, a gift passed down from the gods themselves, and will always carry undertones of destiny for all love is woven into the fabric of the universe.”

The goddess extends her palm, and a radiant orb of silvery light coalesces amidst her claws.

I stare at its beauty, mesmerized as the sphere of light shifts inside like a fortune teller’s crystal ball.

“Look into the essence of your bond with Ilian, sweet Zhuliya, peer through the layers of memory that form it.

The answers you seek are already inside of you, but sometimes the eyes must see to believe.”

As I focus on the luminous globe, scenes from Ilian’s and my journey unfold—a kaleidoscope of moments that I realize are my memories pulled from my mind.

“Your bond is a vibrant mosaic of undisputable moments of realness that even the cosmic dance of those kismet cannot saturate.

The threads of this reality intertwine with these mystical forces to give depth to the rainbow of love that colors your fate.

Embrace this complexity, for it is within these intricacies that the beauty of your connection resides.”

Inside the ball of light, Ilian smiles, and my heart clenches. He looks at me with such adoration, it’s hard to believe that he doesn’t not love me.

“I’m scared,” I confess in a small voice.

“Love is scary. It means opening yourself for the chance to be hurt, but remember that the other person is just as vulnerable. Real love doesn’t seek to wound—it heals. Are you ready to repair the ache in your soul?”

“I want to so badly—”