“Because they’ve crossed me. This is what I was talking about in the car. They’ve crossed me, and now they have to be dealt with. Please don’t worry about it. You don’t have to think about it at all. Come on.” I lead her out of the kitchen, but she’s holding back. I can feel it. I let go of her hand as we reach the entrance hall.

“I don’t want them to be hurt. It was me they were after. Don’t I get a say in this?” she asks.

I rub the bridge of my nose, getting irritated. “Penny, there are going to be times you can interfere. This is not one of them. They haven’t just tried to hurt you. They’ve gone against me. Their leader. This is more than just you getting hurt.”

“No,” she raises her voice, shaking her head. “I don’t want that hanging over my head. You’re going to hurt them or worse because of me.”

I can’t help myself. I lose it and roar at her, “He was trying to take advantage of you.” I glare at her. “I don’t even want to think what he would have done to you had I not tracked you two. And I already spared him his life once.”

Penny swallows hard and looks at me so sadly it stabs my heart. “So you are going to kill them.”

“I am doing what is necessary to maintain the balance and order of the family,” I say with steel in my voice.

“A family I don’t have a choice of being part of. Is that any better than what he tried to force on me?”

“I haven’t forced you…” I say, now angry.

“You’re forcing me to marry you. Right now, I don’t think I want to, so since I can’t leave my prison, I’ll just go up to my cage.” She turns around, and I frown.

“So you don’t want to marry me? All this lovey-dovey bullshit is just that?” I yell after her.

She pauses on the stairs and turns around. “I thought I saw something in you.”

“You thought you saw weakness, but it isn’t. I’m not a fucking hero, Penny. I’m the devil. You either marry me and get in on it, and I trust you to keep family affairs private, or we live together in separate rooms raising our child pretending to be happy, and you know nothing.” I stare her down, and her gaze bores into mine.

“I…” she hesitates.

“You what? You’re going to act like you don’t like the power? You don’t like what I can do?” I raise my voice, and then I move closer to her. “I’ve never hurt you. I’ve never been physical with you. If you don’t want this, then say so, but the wedding is on. You get to decide whether there’s a relationship afterward or not.”

I turn to storm off, and I hear her choke out a sob, and I pause. I want to make her feel better, but I’m too angry, so I walk into my office. I light a cigarette and pour myself a whiskey.

Women.

No, just her. Just Penny.

I would burn the world for her, but my heart feels like it’s torn right now because I want her to choose a relationship. I want her world and mine to be intertwined without me worrying that she’s going to go to the cops and rat me out. I don’t know what to do.

My phone goes off, and it’s a text from her.

I want to stay at Asher for a few days while I decide. I’m too upset to be here. Is that fine, sir?

Sir? Sir! I clench my jaw and then take a deep breath.

Luka has to give you two guards. Leon and maybe one other. He’ll check in on you daily to ensure you’re not trying to run away.

It doesn’t take her long to reply.

There is nowhere to run to.

I can hear the sadness in her response, and I want to throw my phone across the room. All I have ever wanted was for her to be happy. All I wanted was for her to feel as though she fit in and that she could relax around me. I’ve undone all of that now.

I doubt she’ll choose to have a relationship with me.

Danil might be right, she might be my ultimate weakness, but I won’t let anyone else know that. Not even her.

I need to protect her and our son at all costs. I was hoping to spend tonight choosing a name for our baby, but instead, the mother of my child is going to stay with a friend because she can’t stand the sight of me.

She’s realized I’m a monster.

No, she’s just remembered. The last few months have just been an illusion—the illusion of choice.

I thought I had a choice, but in reality, my life was already predetermined by my position in the family. I can never have normal. I can never be normal.

She accepts the darkness within me, or the only way we’ll be considered together is that we share a house.

Chapter 24 - Penny

I can’t tell Asher why I am spending a couple of days at her place, but she’s excited that I am. I pack a bag for two weeks at least, and as I do, I feel a sadness weighing heavy on my heart. This is my home now. It feels like my home, but is that all a lie?

I want to believe Kervyn loves me, but I don’t know. He just mercilessly ordered the death of his family members. What’s to say he won’t do that to me, too, one day?

What if he ordered someone to kill our son?

No. A part of me knows he wouldn’t hurt our child. But do I want to be a part of this world? This world where people are casually murdered simply for not following instructions. I don’t know the rules of this game. I don’t know the ways of this society, and I’m expected to be a queen within this family of families.

I wish there were a sneak peek or preview into what will be expected of me so I can make a decision.

The illusion of choice.

I don’t get to make that much of a decision because regardless of what I choose, whether I love Kervyn or not, I have to marry him. There is no going back from that now at all.

The detectives. I could tell the detectives.

A part of me knows I never would betray Kervyn like that, and strangely enough, it’s not because I fear him but rather because I feel protective of him.

That has to count for something, right?

Asher welcomes me with open arms even though it means we have two guards in the house with us at all times. She’s used to Leon, though, so it doesn’t make that much of a difference, and they mostly stick to the front room or the kitchen.

I spend my days with Asher hashing out more details about the wedding, trying to keep my mind off of Kervyn.

“I can’t take it anymore,” Asher says.

I look up from my magazine and raise an eyebrow. “Take what?”

“You! You’re not telling me why you’re fighting with Kervyn. You guys were so in love at the baby shower and so excited for the announcement, and then you rock up here out of the blue after he insists I have to come there every time to visit you…” she huffs.

I have to think quickly. “Well,” I say, “I needed to get out of the house for a bit. It was getting a bit like cabin fever. And this was the only place he’d let me stay.”