Religion — Livingston

Half Life — Livingston

But Daddy I Love Him — Taylor Swift

This book is for all the chronic people pleasers who are always putting others before themselves.

You are lovable without sacrificing yourself.

And if they ask you to sacrifice your happiness for theirs, fuck them.

AUTHOR NOTE:

I’ve been heartbroken that the crew’s series is over, but I’m in awe every day of everyone who has been here for the journey. Thank you a million times for reading and loving these characters because your support and enthusiasm have meant the world to me.

Each message, review, post, and shared moment has brought these stories to life in ways I never imagined. I could have never done this alone and you all made sure I never had to!

As we finish this series, I’m filled with so much gratitude and excitement for the future. You have all has inspired me and I can’t wait to share what comes next.

Thank you for being a part of this incredible adventure.

ONEDAISY

When I started college, I didn’t think it would end like this.

After two years in my sorority, I was leaving, packing up my room and moving back in with my dad until a dorm opened up or until I finished out the last two years of my degree. Somehow my life that seemed so shiny and new two years ago felt heavy and worn out. I kept trying to get ahead, but kept stepping backwards.

Now I’m moving into the room I grew up in, and most likely falling back under my dad’s strict rules. Luckily, the house was only ten minutes from campus, but not living here would change my entire experience. I could only hope that a dorm room would open up soon. They said my chances were high within the first two months, but I might not get my choice of dorms or rooms, which didn’t really bother me at this point. 

Anything would be better than moving home for long. 

Dean, my boyfriend of a year, walked in, grabbing another box for me. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes, I am,” I said, for what felt like the millionth time. “I don’t want it to end like this, but I think it’s for the best. I can’t stay here when half the girls have made it clear they don’t want me to.”

“I mean, I get there’s some fighting going on, but what about the fact that you will be further from me, and I will have a thousand fewer chances to actually see you, not to mention getting any alone time with you? You do still have friends here. It’s not like they are all mean to you.”

I looked back at the photo on my dresser still, the one of the entire house of girls on one of our event days. There were a few girls here I would still consider a friend, but the other half of them had taken the first opportunity to ruin my life. They had a new leader. Sydney wanted my place as president and after she nearly got me kicked out of school for all her complaints, I would willingly hand it over to be left alone. The excitement of joining the sorority had worn off and now I wanted to not be looking over my shoulder every day to see if someone was sabotaging me.

“I’m hoping it’s temporary,” I said, trying to sympathize with him, but it was hard when I had enough on my plate. “A month, maybe two tops. I’m waiting for a room to open up.”

“A month or two? Are you just going to be spending time at the frat house with me, then?”

I knew I made a face, but I couldn’t help it. “No, definitely not.” I didn’t know if I could stomach staying there again. The last time I did, I woke up and puked, the smell in the kitchen so unbearable I couldn’t even stomach making a cup of coffee. Not to mention the endless loud noises that left me with almost zero sleep every night.

“What? Why not?”

“I’m sorry Dean, I just don’t really feel comfortable sleeping there, and I like my sleep. I need my sleep. Which doesn’t happen easily when I try to stay the night.”

“So what? I’m going to be sleeping at your dad’s house? That sounds weird and inconvenient.”

“Umm, no to that, too. He’s really strict and will never let a guy sleep there with me. I think even if we were married, we would be in separate rooms at his house,” I said with a laugh, but when I turned, Dean was sneering.

“So are you saying we won’t be spending any nights together until you have a dorm room?”

“I mean, maybe? I guess I could try to sleep at the frat house, but could you change the lock code to your room or something? The guys there do not seem to have boundaries.”

“No, I mean, even if you do, what is that going to be, like, once a week tops? Daisy, you’re not serious right now, are you?”

“I’m doing the best I can. You know I can’t stay here. This place is so toxic ,I’m losing my mind.”

“Couldn’t you stick it out until a dorm room opens up?”

“That’s not how it works.” I smiled, trying to give a reassuring touch, but he was stiff. “You could always sneak into my room. That could be fun,” I said, trying to lighten the mood.

He rolled his eyes and scowled, not meeting my eye. “No, I’m not doing that. If your dad found us, he would be pissed, and then it would get back to my dad, and to coach.”

“And we’re adults, so I think that would be okay. Come on,” I said, grabbing his arm again. “I think it’s hot.”

“Not when I have so much riding on my dad paying for my school so I can play football full time.”

“You literally get drunk every weekend, if not every day during the week, and you don’t worry about getting caught with that?”

He stepped back, and I didn’t miss the coldness that came over him. “You know, we have a lot of games lined up for the next month and there are events outside of the games that I have to go to. Then, you won’t even be nearby, so…”

“So?”

“So maybe we should take a break for a month. You can focus on all these changes, and I can focus on football.”

Red hot anger rushed over me like a tidal wave. I knew exactly what he wanted to focus on, and this was the perfect opportunity for him to do that. “And maybe you can put a little more focus on Sydney, too?”

“Daisy, you know nothing happened. She hit on me, I turned her down, the end.”

“Fine, if we are on a break, are you going to sleep with her? Are you going to be sleeping with other people?”

“I mean, maybe, I guess. If we aren’t together, would it matter?”

“Are you going to sleep with Sydney?” I asked again, each word carefully said, because I knew the answer would make or break us.

“I said ‘maybe’. She has texted me a few times. I don’t want to tell you yes or no because I don’t know.”

“That’s pretty much a yes.” I took a step back. “Okay, then. Get out.”

“Daisy, we don’t have to make this bad. It will just be a month and then we can talk.”

“No need. We’re done.”

“Wait, no, please. I do love you. I wasn’t trying to break up permanently. We just both have a lot going on.”