“Then we have a deal?”
I looked at Ash, and for the first time that night, my chest tightened, the all too familiar feeling of my heart dying coming over me. Even if I went about it wrong, I was trying to do what was right, and I would keep trying.
“Yeah, we have a deal. Can I go for now?”
“Yes, but I can’t make any promises about what is going to happen.”
“Then neither can I.”
“Fine, go now, and leave Daisy here. I’ll drive her home.”
I got out and turned to Ash. “Should I tell her?”
“Are you able to tell her without going back on your promise? If you talk to her right now, are you just going to want more?”
“Yes.”
“Then go. I’ll give her the best explanation I can.”
I nodded and headed to my car, the guys surrounding me immediately.
“I’m going to go for a week or two,” I said, surprised that tears were threatening me now. “Unless I get a call to come back. I might just hang out for a few days. Okay?”
“Alright,” Fox said. “We understand.”
“It’s going to be okay, Kye. It will all work out fine,” Jax said.
Ransom knocked my arm. “Just let everyone cool down.”
“I think it’s worse than just cooling down now. If Dean or the Sheriff press charges, Daisy and all of you could get dragged into this mess. I don’t want that for any of you. I’ll see you guys soon.”
“Just be safe.”
I nodded and got in the car, heading to the apartment to grab a few things and then back out. Leaving the apartment, leaving town, leaving the state. The overwhelming pounding of my heart filled my ears. I loved her and I couldn’t risk ruining her life.
Even for a day, I needed to be as far away as physically possible from Daisy.
THIRTYDAISY
There were no texts.
No calls.
His name didn’t come up again on my phone.
Mine didn’t come up on his anymore.
And even if it did, I knew he wouldn’t respond. I had tried, but they never went through.
I was told that every day gets easier until one day I will wake up and it won’t hurt.
But when you make a million mistakes, that doesn’t happen.
It was always what-if. A thousand what-ifs that made me lie down each night and wonder: if I had done one thing different, would that mean I would be at his apartment tonight instead of my dorm?
If I would be spending every night with him.
I knew I loved Kye, but each day that passed without him, I was only loving him more.
That wasn’t what was supposed to happen.
It was supposed to get better, but every day got worse. A pain that kept burrowing deeper into my bones until it took over. Until all I could feel was the pain of being ripped apart.
And just like the hundred other nights before tonight, I grabbed his shirt I wore the first night I stayed with him.
And I lay down.
And I cried until I was forced to sleep.
Until my body had no other choice but to give up for the day.
And I knew tomorrow would be the same.
And every night after that.
6 Years Later
THIRTY-ONEKYE
