“What is this?” Grant asked as he stared at a picture of himself with his dad and his two brothers.
“That was the day he died,” Randy shook his head reverently. “Your mama took that picture before we left the house.”
“The little boy in this picture should remember him,” Grant said, finally looking away from the photograph in his hand. “We look close.”
“You were,” Randy nodded, emotions flooding his features. “He was so attentive to you. No one ever relished the role of big brother quite like Eisenhower did.”
Grant smiled as he handed the picture back to Randy.
“That day, I only had three boys to bring home to their mama, Grant…and I couldn’t do it,” Randy’s eyes became saturated, and his voice cracked as he placed the treasured photograph back into his wallet. “David was home from West Point on break; Ike had just been appointed for the following school year. I was the proudest man that day. It was supposed to be boys’ night out! We were going out to celebrate another Cohen man’s appointment to the United States Military Academy.”
“I saw you even put me in an Army t-shirt for the occasion,” Grant gestured.
“Ike and I had gone on a trip to visit David at school. Ike found that shirt in a little toddler size, and he couldn’t wait to bring it home to you,” Randy smiled. “You loved it. When your mother would try to dress you in anything else, you would complain, ‘No, Mama! Ike shirt!’ That’s what you called it…your Ike shirt!”
Knowing that the subject of his brother’s death was a difficult one for his father, Grant thought of changing the subject, but he couldn’t get his mind off of his father’s insistence that he was no hero. “What happened that night?” he asked softly.
“The driver of an eighteen wheeler fell asleep at the wheel,” Randy explained, his voiced strained. “David and I were thrown from the car. David was banged up, but he was alive, so I left him and ran back to the car as fast as my knee would let me. The car was on fire, nearly totally engulfed at that point. There wasn’t much time…I knew I had to act fast…and I wish I could tell you that I did something miraculous and heroic…but I was no hero…I was no combat-tested Army officer doing the impossible. I was just a scared dad who couldn’t react fast enough.”
Grant didn’t take his eyes off his father as Randy battled the emotions of his memory.
“I could see Ike,” Randy cried, his tears flowing with raw and all-consuming intensity now. “He was hurt, but he was moving; he was alert; he was fighting with his seatbelt. I knew he had a chance to pull himself out of that car. He had a chance…he had a fighting chance. You …my baby boy…you were on the other side…just two years old, trapped, strapped helplessly in a car seat, screaming for your daddy.”
The color drained from Grant’s face as his eyes widened. “Nobody ever told me that I was in the car, Dad,” Grant cried.
Randy put his arm around Grant and pulled his son close to him. “A hero, Grant,” he wailed, “could have gotten both of his boys out of that car in time! I quit being a hero that day, and I’m so sorry that you grew up with a father who was determined, at any cost, to prove to himself that he could be a hero again.”
Grant was crying so hard that his tears gripped his windpipe, and he struggled to catch his breath. Tears flowing, he made himself look up at his father. “Do you ever wish you had made a different choice that day?” he bawled.
“Oh, Grant,” Randy sighed, pulling his son back into his arms even tighter than before. “There was no choice to make, and, in a way, I’m grateful for that…because there would have been no way for me to choose between two boys who I love more than you can imagine. You needed me…more than he did, you needed me. I did what I had to do, and, if I could go back and trade my life for his, I would do it without a thought, but there never has been and never will be a day when I wish I hadn’t pulled you from that car, Grant.”
“Why has nobody ever told me this story?” Grant demanded.
“It’s not easy to talk about,” Randy lowered his head, forcing Grant to remain in his embrace.
“I could go to West Point; I could do it, Dad; I could do it for you and for my brother…” Grant’s words were flowing so rapidly that he had yet to take a breath.
“Grant, look at me,” Randy took his son’s face in hands to force eye contact, though Grant looked away. “Look at me, Buddy.”
Grant slowly allowed his eyes to meet his father’s. “I’m so sorry, Dad,” he cried. “I’m so sorry for everything…for every time I messed up…”
“I’m the one who should be sorry,” Randy wept. “God knows I never blamed you for what happened to your brother…but maybe subconsciously it was the reason I pushed so hard.”
The side door of the house opened, and David stepped outside, his face registering immediate concern. “Is everything okay out here?” he gulped.
Grant turned to his brother, tears flowing.
“Dad, what’s going on?” David moved slowly toward them.
Randy cracked his neck to one side and then the other.
“David, why didn’t you ever tell me?” Grant cried accusatorily. “Why didn’t anybody tell me that if it wasn’t for me, Ike would still be alive?”
David’s eyes flashed as he stared at Randy, terrified of what his father must have said.
“Grant, that is not what I meant for you to take from that,” Randy hung his head.
Grant looked only at David. “He said he never wishes that he hadn’t pulled me from that car, but I can’t believe that….it’s not realistic! All those times I messed up so badly…it had to be there, in the back of his mind. Every time I got in trouble, he had to wonder how differently things could have been. Every time I failed him, he had to think about it …”
“Don’t do this to yourself, Grant!” David grabbed Grant’s shoulders. “What happened that day was an awful tragedy…”
“You and Ike were so close,” Grant interrupted. “Don’t you ever wish that Dad had saved your best friend instead of your headache of a little brother?”
“Grant,” David sighed.
“It’s okay,” Grant shook his head. “You don’t have to say, no. I know that would be a lie…even if you didn’t mean anything by it.”
“I regret that I didn’t have the strength to pull myself off the ground and run back to that car until it was too late,” David said truthfully. “It’s one of those situations that has no right answers. But, I do know that I am so thankful that I have gotten to know you over the last sixteen years. That two-year-old that Ike and I both so adored has turned out to be quite a blessing to our family. I’ve always been able to see your heart when you look into the eyes of your niece; I see it now in the way you are with Hailey. Grant, Ike would be so proud of you! Did Dad tell you what Ike’s last words were?”
Grant shook his head. He glanced over at his father whose eyes filled with fresh tears. “I remember it like it happened yesterday,” Randy recalled. “Despite the fact that he was trying feverishly to free himself with wrists that were shattered, his voice in the middle of that horrific situation remained so eerily calm that his words seemed to rise above the flames. You were screaming for me and then for Ike. The flames were so close, and you were so scared. As I reached the car, I heard Ike trying to soothe your tears.”
“What did he say?” Grant swallowed.
Randy smiled, his pride in his middle son’s courage evident. “He said, ‘Close your eyes and say your prayers, Grant. Daddy’s coming. Daddy’s coming. He’ll always be with you, and so will I.’”
“Ike never made a promise that he didn’t keep,” David shook his head. “He was the most loyal and devoted friend and brother you could ever imagine. He said he would never leave you, and I don’t think he has.”
“I remember the strangers who held me back and kept me from going back into that car after it blew up,” Randy recalled with fists clinched. “At the time, I hated them for stopping me. I knew Ike was gone. I knew I couldn’t save him. But, in the moment, I wanted to be the father who died trying.” Randy reached for Grant again and pulled him into a tight embrace. “But I knew soon after, that, despite the fact that part of my heart was gone, there was a reason that God put those strangers there and gave them the strength to hold off a six-foot-six, career military veteran who was fighting with all he had.” Randy kissed the top of Grant’s head. “I have never wanted anything but the best for you. I have pushed West Point because that represented what was best for me. If Harvard is right for you, then don’t you dare think that I will be any less proud when I stand at your graduation than I was when David received that first salute.” He ruffled Grant’s hair. “And you’re right, Soldier. I want you to be all you can be…because it’s just a good motto to live by. West Point’s loss is Harvard’s gain! All I ask is that you be the best darn lawyer they have ever produced.”