“My name is Stella. And I have something to offer you . . . if you’re willing to listen.”
CHAPTER 34
THE INTERVIEW
2021
[Studio]
JODI LEE: Are you saying, Marlow, that you remember your real mother?
MARLOW FIN: [Takes a deep breath] I don’t know if remember is the right word for it. It’s more like . . . like I can sense her. You know how they say a newborn recognizes the smell of his mother? It’s like that. I just recognize something.
She left an imprint on me that can never be taken away. She existed at some point . . . she had to have. Even though I was abandoned, I am still her daughter.
JODI LEE: Do you ever think about your real mother?
MARLOW FIN: All the time.
JODI LEE: What about her?
MARLOW FIN: What she probably looked like. If she has the same mannerisms as me. If I would recognize her if I saw her walking down the street. There have been times I’ve seen a woman who looks like what I’ve pictured, and I have to keep myself from stopping her.
JODI LEE: And does it stir up any memory of her? These visualizations?
MARLOW FIN: I started to hear a voice. Someone saying “baby, baby, baby.” It repeats in my head like a mantra. I don’t recognize the voice, but it sounds very comforting in my head. Like she’s telling me everything is going to be okay.
I know it sounds like I’m nuts. Jesus, she says she hears voices, right? But it’s singular. Repetitive. At a subconscious level. It really tripped me up when I was modeling overseas. I mean, I did think I was going crazy at the time. I was using pretty hardcore. No, that’s not true—very hardcore is more accurate. I didn’t want to admit to anyone that I was lonely.
JODI LEE: Why? You were well into your career by then, right? Why did you feel lonely?
MARLOW FIN: You have so much constant attention on you, people literally swarming around you, touching your hair, your face, strangers seeing you naked as you change between locations. It’s a beehive you can’t get out of. Even with all of that right in your face, you feel like you are completely and utterly alone in a room. Who actually gets you? Who actually gives a damn about you?
JODI LEE: I think plenty of people did, Marlow, and still do. Yours was a face that couldn’t be shown enough. You were on top of the world.
MARLOW FIN: Was I, though?
I must have been that spun out because my agent sent me to this hypnotist in Sweden. She took me deep. Like deeper than I thought I could ever go. And that voice? It became clearer. Everything became clearer.
JODI LEE: But yet it all still remains a mystery. The origins of Marlow Fin.
MARLOW FIN: [Closes eyes for a moment, breathing in]
JODI LEE: Are you all right?
MARLOW: Mmm-hmm.
JODI LEE: What would you do, then, if you were ever able to uncover that mystery?
MARLOW FIN: What mystery?
JODI LEE: The mystery of how the little girl ended up all alone in the woods.
MARLOW FIN: [Smiles] We’ll have to wait and see, I guess.
JODI LEE: And the mystery of your sister, Isla . . .
MARLOW FIN: [Shakes head] You know what I don’t get, Jodi?
JODI LEE: What is that?
MARLOW FIN: There has been so much attention and focus on me. What was I doing before that night? What did I do while I was there at the cabin? What happened the next morning? The scrutiny is real.
But what about Isla? Where is she? Has anyone seen my sister?
JODI LEE: We all want to know the answer to that, too, Marlow.
MARLOW FIN: And here’s the other thing. What about questioning other people besides me?
JODI LEE: Meaning?
MARLOW FIN: We’re forgetting I wasn’t the only person with Isla. Why isn’t everyone questioning the one other person who was there that night?
CHAPTER 35
ISLA
2010
