Following a preliminary introduction of herself to a group of bright-eyed students, now a Professor Dawkins, a title she well deserved. Following opening remarks to her class, she outlined her preferred teaching style:
“First, astronomy is a hard subject and should not be taken too lightly. Most of you already know a little bit about astronomy are you wouldn’t be here. So, let’s get started. Your first, upcoming assignment is to read the first three chapters of your textbook and be prepared to discuss in detail at our next meeting.”
“This semester the class will be doing a more in-depth study of astronomy. Including optical telescopes, refractors vs. reflectors, sun’s granules and super granules, sunspot cycles, solar winds, and much more. Oh, yes! You will need to learn and study all about the Hubble Space Telescope which is probably the most exciting astronomy tool that has happened in our time.”
As an elective, and just for fun, Professor Dawkins offered a study in astrology aware that most of her enrolled Astronomy students read their daily horoscope with most reading it just for fun—while several students took their personal readings more seriously—often staying in bed on days that the forecast for that day was unfavorable; offering some risk if precautions were not taken.
“Astrology is a form of scientific study or a belief system akin to religion or philosophy. The study of astrology provides a way of relating the patterns made by the sun, moon, planets, and other heavenly bodies to life on earth. Relating action, reaction, emotion and thought process to the universe outside of them.”
Impressed with the way she taught astrology; Professor Dawkins’ students arranged to have a well-known fortune teller forecast her future. Legendary Madame Quaker was either 100 or 105 years old. No one knew for sure. She had clients as far-reaching as Europe, mostly rich and lonely widows. At one time, the wife of a popular United States President solicited advice from her regarding her husband’s international travels. Having these kind, gullible souls on a retainer certainly, did not hurt her bottom line! None of her clients, however, knew she harbored a deep, dark secret. A secret she chose not to share with anyone.
Madame Quaker, as revealed by a study of her past life, started out as a successful fortune teller in New Orleans. Confident she had a rewarding life ahead of her. But it all came to an unfortunate end following a visit from one of her regulars, Ms. Calabash. Ms. Calabash came from one of New Orleans’ oldest and richest families, and like most people of that genre, had a problem. She was grossly overweight.
Ms. Calabash, aware of being grossly overweight, came to Madame Quaker seeking her advice regarding her weight. Hoping that Madame Quaker might find a magic pill to return her back to her old, thin self of years past.
Madame Quaker, knowing absolutely nothing about nutrition, not wanting to lose a valuable client, referred to a few tarot cards, stared into a cup of stale tea leaves, announcing she saw a weight-reduction diet guaranteed to help her lose the extra weight.
Madame Quaker recalling a visit she made to one of those health stores specializing in herbal medicines. She quickly wrote down three of the most potent vitamin brands she remembered, noting all three guaranteeing rapid weight loss. This, she provided to Ms. Calabash. Three weeks after her visit, Ms. Calabash did in fact lose a lot of weight. Excited, she shared the information with friends. Giving full credit of her magical weight loss to Madame Quaker. It would have been a great endorsement to Madame Quakers’ career had not the following happened. Ms. Calabash dropped dead from unspecified causes a week later.
Although Madame Quaker was cleared by the authorities of having anything to do with her death, many of New Orleans’ finest citizens thought otherwise. Friends close to Madame Quaker suggested she leave New Orleans for a spell, at least until all the notoriety of the case blew over. Accepting their advice, she relocated to Iowa to be near a distant relative. She never returned to New Orleans.
The university students’ request for a consultation was turned down by Madame Quaker— claiming she already had as many clients as she could possibly handle. And secondly, she was thinking of retiring. When they mentioned Professor Dawkins name, she changed her mind. Professor Dawkins’ name was by now well known in many circles. Having her as a client would give an immeasurable boost to her already long list of clients.
When told of the meeting with Madame Quaker which the students had already paid for, Allison laughed. “You are asking me to meet with someone who I have spent this entire semester trying to convince you that astrology practiced by someone like her is voodoo science? You should know how people of that kind repulse me. However, a visit to the ‘Great Madam’ could be fun. Give me a chance to debunk her nonsense.”
Allison arrived right on the appointed time at the address given. An impressive, two-story constructed bungalow in a well-known district. The first thing she noticed, besides how dark was the interior, was the old desk covered with the usual paraphrenia that charlatans like Madame Quaker use. Mysterious charts with all types of Zodiac signs, the old crystal ball with what looked like rat droppings floating around inside. A little ash tray, with some type of incense sending up a small trail of smoke.
Madame Quaker’s appearance was shocking! Even Madame Quaker’s attempt at accentuating her forehead with a bright scarf wrapped around her head did not draw your attention away from a gigantic wart protruding from the end of her nose. It reminded Allison of an old John Candy movie where the school principal had a similar wart on her face and Candy recommending, she get a rat to gnaw it off. But perhaps that would be asking too much of the rat. As he must be tired from producing droppings for her to use in her crystal ball.
With an obvious fake accent, Madame Quaker asked: “What can I do for you, darling?”
“I would like for you to predict my future. I believe my students have already provided you with my age and date of birth,” Allison offered.
“Yes! Yes! Of course,” Quaker replied. “I was so, intrigued to finally meet someone of your fame and prestige which goes beyond just the state of Iowa, I decided to prepare in advance of your arrival a study of all the Zodiac signs you were born under. And from my analysis prepared a written summary of your future path.”
Handing over a pale sheet of paper, lightly sprinkled with some type of smelly powder, was the written summary she had prepared in a dark, almost unintelligible, language. Which Allison began to read:
You are both bold and confident. Freedom is the most important part of your life.The night you were born, the moon and the stars were unusually bright, shining down, off the snow drifts that surrounded your home. It was an easy birth with strong evidence of magnetic fields emanating from planet Venus. You are emotional and sensitive. Your home is filled with love. A love only a mother could give. Your father is often away from home. Paying little attention to his growing family which brings you great pain.
As a child, you were playful and inquisitive. You carry with you, an awareness of your surroundings that anyone can see. Viewed by your peers as both passionate and compassionate which explains your success. You need people around you to maintain harmony in your life. You are not a dreamer or romantic. Your career comes first. You will continue to succeed and do not be surprised if your boyfriend asks you to marry him.
Unfortunately, you will be tasked to make many difficult decisions. Some that could either make you great or bring you down in despair. Your biggest strength is that you are a perfectionist, and a workaholic. One who gets great joy in making life better for everyone. Your students display great loyalty to you which is a plus for anyone in the teaching profession. Besides people, animals bring you great joy. Overall, your future is bright.
After reading this tabloid which could fit practically anybody, Allison set back and responded, “First, I am about to tell you something shocking. Something that I have never told another living soul. I was not born in a home surrounded by snowbanks. I am not even from this planet. When I was four, an accident occurred on my planet, planet Zorbus.”
“This accident landed me in an Iowa cornfield where a loving family took me in to raise as one of their very own. It was like a miracle, the Dawkins, my earth family, having just lost a child of my age, seeing me at their front door, thought I had been resurrected from the dead and gave me the dead child’s name, Allison. I am only here and able to reach the level of success I have accomplished because of their loving care of someone they honestly believed was their biological daughter.”
“I tell you all this not without fear. As I have no doubt anyone, even if you repeated this story, would believe you as your entire life been nothing but a fraud; a guise to rip people off and take their hard-earned money. I can’t tell you how good it fills to finally tell someone my true story. By the way: I do not have a boyfriend. Now, if you have nothing else to say to me, I will take my leave as I have a life to live. One filled with hope, love and joy, something you will never experience.”
A real pity no one was around to witness Madame Quaker’s horrified facial expression. After all the years of handing out made-up prophesies, Madame Quaker finally met her match. A few days later, a sign conspicuously appeared on her door, Closed for good. A couple of days later an obituary hit the local newspaper. Announcing the death of Madame Quaker. She had died from a massive heart attack. She really was 105.
15
Sibling Soulmates
The old farm had grown over the years. Some additional property was purchased from a nearby neighbor giving the old homestead a new look. Additional livestock was added—including a horse to keep Sadie, although quite old and still living.
Uncle Bubba moved from his small place to live in the family’s old home. Which, up to this time had stood vacant. The family decided that Uncle Bubba should be the overseer of the entire farm. No longer called just a farm. In honor of Peggy the farm was renamed the Peggy Pink Pig Ranch. Peggy just loved just-born little piglets, which, at birth, were nice, soft, and pink— The three P ranch, for short.
Paul, after graduating from law school, moved to New York City. He joined a prestigious law firm. Pauline coincidently moved to New York City to work for a famous fashion design house. She and Paul met occasionally for dinner, frequently finding themselves reminiscing about the past.
Rebekah, in her third year of college, was studying to be a veterinary physician, employing her knowledge of veterinarian science to keep all the ranch animals in perfect health condition. Rebekah, with the passing of Riff and Raff, brought home a beautiful red cocker spaniel whom she named Jessica. In only a matter of time, Jessica won the hearts of everyone.
It was one of those rare Saturdays, when all the sisters, leaving their jobs behind, hung around the house. Not wanting to go outside to sunbathe; staying inside to avoid one of Iowa’s hottest summer days—with several old timers bemoaning, might break the heat record recorded in Ames, Iowa back in 1988 with the temperature reaching a record-setting one hundred- and two-degrees Fahrenheit. Everyone, except Rebekah, had been home for the day. Rebekah, running late from her internship job at the local vet office, marched up to Pauline and Allison who were rocking on the front porch, fuming.
“Well, it looks like someone’s having a bad day,” chimed in Pauline and Allison at the same time.
“It was worse than hell.” exploded Rebekah. “It was horrible. That old cow Ms. Pennington brought her sick dog in five minutes to twelve knowing full well that we close at twelve on Saturdays. Doctor Wells, the good soul he is agreed to see the dog. The dog had been sick for nearly three days, which meant plenty of time for her to bring him in before now. Worse yet, the dog was at least two years behind on his meds and rabies shots, a mandatory requirement in this State.”
"Then, Dr. Wells, fully aware of how upset his staff was, explained that the only way he could get his message across to Ms. Pennington about the care of her dog was to hit her in the pocketbook. Which he did."
“Too bad I’m not in charge of animal welfare in this country," Rebekah mused. "First, I would begin my duties by shutting down every puppy mill in this country. I would put an end to the importation of exotic animals. Making ownership of a domestic pet so expensive, only caring people would be able to afford them. Persons, who knowingly mistreat animals, would automatically get at least six months in prison.”
"What about the cats?" Pauline gloated.
“Cats? Don’t get me started! The most misunderstood, mistreated animal on the face of this planet. People either do not know or do not care, how quickly cats reproduce. In just three weeks or less, after delivering one litter she can get pregnant again. So, it should not come as a surprise to anyone, that nearly a half-million unwanted cats are born in this country every year.”
“Don’t tell me that people no longer put unwanted kittens in a burlap bag; with the unwanted kittens being dumped into the river. Because I know better. At birth, they are blind, cute, and beautiful. Who can resist them? With eyes closed, they have no idea how the world will accept them, lovingly or with hostility. Most times, the latter. Perhaps keeping their eyes closed permanently would be the better choice. At least that way, they wouldn’t see the torture coming.”
