Adrian laughed. ‘I have heard rumours that both of their respective cupboards at uni were a walking advertisement for Heinz beans.’
Joe joined in: ‘If we’d offered cheesy puffs in fancy bowls, we might have got a ten from them. Shall I whip up some chicken nuggets?’
‘See what you’ve done?’ I shot Rory a look. ‘We’re the butt of every joke.’ I choked back another handful of seeds to prove a point.
‘Fifty quid says she spits those out.’ Rory wiggled his eyebrows at me.
‘I’ll raise you sixty.’ Maeve pinched my arm lightly. ‘Although, we’ve now triggered the competitive streak. She’ll eat the whole bowl.’
I swallowed, raising my arms in victory. ‘Screw all of you.’
‘I really do think that would ruin the friendship dynamic we’ve worked so hard on as a group.’ Rory hid behind his sombrero as we all started chucking pumpkin seeds his way.
3
‘And another landslide victory to moi.’ Ella held up her green smoothie triumphantly, adding another check mark to her tally.
It was a stupid competition that had started a few weeks prior to launch, when we’d all been so hellbent on finalising every detail that we’d consisted of 99 per cent caffeine, 1 per cent human. The rules were simple: make the most of your Pret subscription and consume the most drinks to get your next month’s subscription free on Level’s expenses. As far as employee incentives went, it was proving to be pretty successful. I’d banned Rory from participating after he almost body-slammed me on his way into the office, too desperate to add a tally to his name.
Dexter fanned his nose. ‘I would not want to be Darcy. All those smoothies you consume have got to come out the other end at some point.’
Harriet snorted, barely looking up from her Itsu and the crime novel she had been devouring. ‘Relationships are all about compromise.’
Ella, who often looked to Harriet for back up (we all did), clapped. ‘Say it louder for the people in the back! You’re just bitter that your measly two Americanos a day couldn’t beat my total.’ She took a long glug of the smoothie to prove her point.
It was lunchtime on a Monday, and everyone was surprisingly energetic, the product of a good week of downloads. It was my favourite part of building a company from the ground up: how much everyone genuinely cared. Rory had burst into the office this morning laden with bulk-bought custard doughnuts to celebrate. My enthusiastic group email had paled in comparison, but I was used to being bad cop. Rory had good cop laced through his veins. He chose this moment to walk back into the office, two Diet Cokes in hand. He chucked one in my direction with no warning, and I scrambled to catch it, shooting him daggers.
‘How are we all?’
Dexter high fived him on his way past. ‘We were discussing the sad fate of Ella’s other half.’
I winced at the phrase ‘other half’ – a personal bugbear and one that came up quite frequently in the world of dating apps.
Ella pouted. ‘Dexter is just jealous that I’ve experienced real-life success with a dating app. How is your lizard doing?’
Dexter crumpled up his napkin and threw it at her. ‘Peggy is an iguana. And she’s doing brilliantly, thanks for asking.’
Rory was watching the camaraderie, one eyebrow raised. ‘I feel like I’ve massively missed something here.’
Harriet filled in the gaps without looking up from her book.
‘Not that I don’t wish Level was my relationship origin story,’ Ella continued. ‘Link is a sad side effect of having met her a few years ago, in a lonely, Level-less world.’
I decided to chime in, swallowing a bite of pasta salad first. ‘You are solid proof that apps can work. And if Link can produce a relationship as steady as yours, just imagine what Level can do.’
Rory had come to a halt, leaning on one of the desks and cracking open his can. I was still hesitant to open mine, aware that my white jeans probably wouldn’t survive an explosion.
Dexter pointed his fork at me. ‘If you’re so confident, boss, why aren’t you using it?’
This was the downside of employing people you’d known a long time – Dexter had been our friend during the university days, and he had plenty of experience in ribbing me.
Before I even had the chance to register his jab, Rory had jumped in. ‘Penny? Come on, she’d never test the goods herself.’
Everyone laughed – including Harriet, who had pulled out a bookmark, deeming our chat more interesting now that we were mocking my dating history. I tried not to feel offended. I wasn’t a complete loser. I’d dated, I just … hadn’t in a while. We’d been busy. I didn’t have time for grown men looking for a substitute mother, or emotionally unavailable men trying to get me to doubt my self-worth. But it didn’t mean I couldn’t date. I narrowed my eyes at the sight of Rory laughing along with the others.
‘Is that a challenge?’
Rory whipped his head round mid-laugh. ‘What?’
Aha. Maybe I didn’t have to be straightlaced, workaholic Penny. Maybe I could surprise the team now and again. Maybe I could be the custard-doughnut-buying, product-testing kind of boss.
‘If that’s an official team challenge, I think I just might accept it.’
Rory was the one person in my life I looked to when I needed someone to challenge me. He looked momentarily thrown that I was giving it back.
‘I was only kidding –’
Dexter interrupted. ‘Don’t ruin this for the rest of us, Snory. Penny using Level? I might cancel my streaming subscription.’
‘Funny.’ I thought about the logistics of inputting my likes and dislikes, waiting for the matches to load. I reckoned I could box it off whilst brushing my teeth or waiting for my pasta to cook. ‘Challenge accepted. Watch me Level up.’
I didn’t necessarily believe that the challenge would be successful, but it was worth it for the look on their faces. Like I’d gone out for lunch and had a brain transplant.
Ella was beaming. ‘Yes, Penny. This is the post-launch spirit we need.’
Rory was communicating to me via facial expression again. This one said ‘Do I need to take your temperature?’
I ignored the look.
