“But,” she continued, fixing bright eyes on Christian. “I’m thrilled that we are going to be a family.”
Was there a touch too much defiance in her delivery? Christian assessed her for a long moment before extending his arm to signal the attentive waiter. “We’re celebrating,” he told Antonio. “A bottle of champagne to toast the newly betrothed.”
Inwardly seething, Christian waited while crystal flutes were placed upon the table and filled, and then gave the newly engaged couple his most political smile. “May you enjoy a lifetime of happiness.” She would assume that he meant her and Coomb.
Christian set the glass to his lips and drank the excellent vintage with little pleasure. While a part of him clamored to be the one she chose, more than anything he hoped she would be happy. Idiot. Why couldn’t he stop doing the right thing where she was concerned? In all other aspects of his life he was a selfish bastard, but when it came to Noelle, he wanted what was best for her.
Of course, the solution was simple. He just needed to believe that the best thing for Noelle was for her to marry him.
In the days since he’d spoken to her at the latest royal wedding and discovered he was a father, Christian had lost numerous hours in daydreaming about his future with Noelle and Marc. Imagining long passion-filled nights in bed with her left him grinning in anticipation.
In contrast the thought of being a father distressed him. Nothing he’d done in his life had prepared him for such a daunting task. What part of buying troubled companies to tear apart and restructure gave him the skills to win the trust and affection of a four-year-old boy?
As a prince, he’d never had to work at making people like him. Those who didn’t enjoy his company respected him because of his position. Foolish or ambitious women, who appreciated his money and position, vied for his attention. Sensible ones and those unsuitable for romancing he charmed without effort, but invested little of himself in the exchanges. His days and nights were consistently filled with an endless supply of business associates, social acquaintances or potential lovers. He cared little about any of them and his encounters blurred together in an indistinct gabble of memories.
Nothing about this shallow, drifting existence had bothered him until Noelle entered his life. She was a magnifying glass that sharpened his perceptions, making him see things as they were instead of as fuzzy renderings on the edges of his awareness. She’d provoked him to question why with all the money he made he wasn’t using some of it to make a positive social impact. But when he’d donated to charities, he’d picked ones that would eventually provide a benefit to him and hadn’t enjoyed the accolades heaped upon him.
Without meaning to she’d pushed him to do better. Be better. She’d never criticized his actions or made suggestions of things he should do, but as he discovered what was important to her, he’d begun to change. All his life he’d barely taken responsibility for himself, much less taken on the burden of anyone else’s welfare. Suddenly he had this insignificant woman in his head all the time. In the morning he’d woken and wondered if she’d missed him in her bed. Throughout his day he noted things he wanted to share with her. She took up space in his narcissistic reality, and he resented her intrusion.
Realizing her effect on him had set off a chain reaction of bad behavior. She’d always forgive and forget, but that hadn’t been the end of it for him.
He’d felt guilty.
And hated it.
Which had naturally led to even worse behavior and eventually the accident. Five years after the fact, that awful night continued to haunt him. He relived the pain and terror every time he caught a glimpse of his reflection or touched the puckered scars that marred his right arm and the right side of his chest, neck and face. The skin tingled in phantom pain. He could have undergone reconstructive surgery for the damage, but preferred to leave the scars as a reminder of his supreme failure.
Christian shook himself out of his dark thoughts and caught Noelle watching him. Worry, longing and regret raced across her face in rapid succession before she looked away. Christian stared at her as she laughed at something Coomb said to her. Was it possible that she still cared and was fighting desperately not to? Something inside Christian clicked into place like the resetting of a dislocated bone. He hadn’t realized how out of whack his psyche had been until the pain vanished. In the peaceful aftermath, he began to plot.
Noelle might be engaged, but she wasn’t married. The ring she wore represented a promise to wed, and he was notorious for making even the most stubborn, committed individuals change their minds.
* * *
Heart thumping in wild abandonment, Noelle gulped down the beginnings of panic. Despite the heartache and the half decade of separation, Christian continued to fascinate and disturb her like no other man. He’d been back in her life for three days, and her judgment was already lousy. She’d invented a fake fiancé and convinced Geoff to play along. All the while she fought against the longing to rake her fingers through Christian’s thick, wavy hair and pull his mouth to hers.
Nothing good would come of getting caught up in the reckless desire that had hampered her innate common sense during the two years she’d loved him. He’d driven her to the highest peaks of ecstasy one day and left her wallowing in uncertainty and disappointment the next. Even accepting that she was responsible for her own happiness, Noelle hadn’t once barred her door or her heart against him. And in the end, he’d been the one to walk away.
Which was why she needed to be so careful now. There was more at stake than her foolish heart. She couldn’t risk that Christian might hurt her son.
His son.
Noelle lifted her fork and held it suspended over the plate the waiter had placed before her. Her thoughts were too complex to sort out the ingredients of the elegantly plated meal. She saw her dinner as a mass of color: shades of brown from caramel to espresso, a range of greens and a golden sauce.
“Something wrong?” Christian prompted, his deep voice silky and sensual.
She made the mistake of meeting his burnished gold eyes. He looked as if he wanted to devour her right then and there. “It’s too beautiful to eat.”
His slow smile curled her toes. “I assure you it will taste even better.”
Breathless in reaction to his dizzying charisma, Noelle jerked her attention back to the meal and admonished herself for letting him get to her. The cuisine that should have dazzled her palate tasted like sawdust in her dry mouth. When would Christian stop dominating her senses? She would have thought five years apart had dulled her body’s reaction to him.
At least she maintained some control over her mind.
It probably helped that she had very little trouble resisting Prince Christian. Arrogant and confident, the royal persona represented everything that had broken her heart five years earlier. Especially when he’d shown up unannounced at her farmhouse after Nic and Brooke’s wedding and presumed she’d marry him to legitimize Marc.
She gave her head a barely perceptible shake. Of course he’d take the easy way out. Why go to the trouble to win a bride and get her pregnant when his former lover had already produced a potential heir. And then there were the two dozen red roses he’d had sent to her office. While grandly romantic, the gesture had barely aroused a twinge of temptation.
It was the vulnerability she’d infrequently glimpsed in him that destroyed all her self-preservation and led to repeated disappointments. During those moments, when his shoulders hunched and the cocky playboy vanished, her defenses crumbled. Whether or not he could accept it, Christian yearned for someone to believe in him, and until he pushed her out of his life, Noelle had naively thought that someone was her.
And now he was back. And making demands on her once more. Concern that Christian had appeared suspicious of her hasty engagement swept over her. Half acting the part of smitten fiancée, half because she needed reassurance, Noelle reached for Geoff’s hand. He responded with a tender smile that would have made her heart flutter if she was actually in love with him.
Christian observed their exchange through half-lidded eyes and Noelle was convinced she and Geoff were successfully selling the fabrication. But when the stilted meal at long last concluded, it was Christian’s hand, warm and too familiar, at the small of her back as they made their way from the restaurant. Geoff had deferred to Christian’s rank, and she was now far too aware that her willpower wasn’t as strong as she’d hoped. As she wove between the tables, a slowly expanding coil of heat threatened her peace of mind.
Christian’s car and driver awaited him at the curb, but instead of bidding them good-night, he lingered while the valet brought Geoff’s car around. They made an awkward trio.
When Geoff would have opened the car door and handed Noelle into the passenger seat, Christian used his height and broad shoulders as a not so subtle barrier to keep Geoff from reaching her.
“I’ve got this.” Christian set his hand on the car door and lifted the corners of his lips, shooting Geoff a perfunctory smile that was quickly gone. When he shifted his gaze to Noelle, his eyes glowed with possessive intent.
“Thank you for a lovely evening,” she said as Christian handed her into the passenger seat.
“I enjoyed meeting your fiancé, but we didn’t get the chance to talk about Marc or our future. I’ll call you tomorrow and we can discuss the best time for the three of us to get together.”
Before Noelle could protest, Christian shut the door and with a brief, wicked grin at getting in the last word, backed away from the car.
Geoff glanced at her before pulling away from the curb. “Are you okay?”
“Sure,” she lied, tearing her gaze away from Christian with effort. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
