“Then why did you kick him out of Heaven?” He sighs and reaches out to grab my hand then pauses, looking at me for permission.
I nod, and He takes my hand in His large palm.
“Many reasons. Some of which no longer matter, but he is where he’s most happy.” That is the worst non-answer I think I’ve ever gotten.
Squinting my eyes at him, I tell him so.
“You should be a lawyer or politician with non-answers like that,” I snark.
He lets out a boisterous laugh, and shakes His head.
“I could be if I wanted to, but I don’t. I kind of have another very important job.” I snort and roll my eyes.
“Yeah, being Ruler of the Universe is kind of a big deal, I suppose.” I give Him a small smirk.
“You’re very much like him, you know.”
“Oh?” He nods.
“You’re extremely witty and smart. And very, very powerful.”
I swallow.“I wish I wasn’t. Powerful, I mean.”
He shakes His head.
“No, Harleigh. You’re powerful because there has never been anyone else like you in the world, and never will be again.”
I choke.“What?”
Squeezing my hand, He explains.
“You are a direct descendent of mine. Therefore, you’re also a descendent of Lucifer.” I nod, because I already know this. “But you were raised with human parents. You had no influence from either Heaven or Hell, good or evil. You’re the only one that has never been raised with one side or the other.”
“So, I’m weird.” I smile, and He grins.
“I know how much you enjoy being different, so if that’s what you want to call it, then yes. You, Harleigh, are weird.” He winks, and I find myself giggling, feeling lighter than I have in a long time. Even Orion can’t bring me this level of peace.
“But I killed someone.” I feel the tears building, and He nods, squeezing my hand.
“You did. But that had to happen.”
“Say what?” I blink.
He sighs.“You had to kill him, Harleigh. It had to be done.”
“Yes, I know he had to die. I get that, but I wasn’t supposed to be the one to do it. It’s not who I am!” Even He doesn’t get it, and He’s God. I really am delusional.
“He did have to die, but you also had to be the one to kill him. Nothing really happens by chance, Harleigh.”
“What?” I whisper, trying to wrap my head around what He’s saying.
“Because you were raised human and never did anything bad, you had to be tested,” He states calmly.
I narrow my eyes at Him, feeling sparks trying to build in my fingertips but I take a deep breath and push the power down.
I’m more than aware that I can’t kill God, but I still refuse to let my power take over again.
“And you think making me kill someone was the best thing to do?! Do you know how bad my suffering has been?!” I shout at Him, standing up to pace. “I’ve felt like I’ve been drowning for months without a word from you, when you could have saved me that pain by telling me I had no control over it!” I scream into the air before turning back on Him.
“I could have, yes. But that would have defeated the purpose.”
UGH!
“What fucking purpose?!” I ask, shouting.
He sighs and shakes His head like He’s disappointed in me for swearing. Well… He can get fucked for the moment.
“Deep down, you would have always wondered if you were truly good, or if you took after your mother and Lucifer. I needed to show you, with something greatly dark, that your light still shines through. There is zero evil inside of you, Harleigh. You need to remember that going forward.”
All at once, it feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders with what He’s saying. Yes, I killed Paul, but it was predetermined by Him. I was never in control of that moment.
Sitting down beside Him again, I cry happy tears.
“So, this wasn’t my fault.”
He shakes His head, wrapping His arms around me.
“Never your fault. Just a rite of passage you had to make in order to stop doubting who you truly are deep down.”
