“I’m not even sure I knew it was Jak’s little paradise until a few days ago. I mean, I must’ve, but it didn’t really register. Where’s he staying?”
Dagan smiled warmly, thinking of the evening when Jak had confessed to him. Since then, he’d been by regularly, dropping off books, paper, ink, and any other little thing he thought Dagan might like. He was like some strange, beautiful bird who occasionally left gifts. Dagan understood it was Jak’s way of befriending him, since flirtation was off the table. As a fellow person who generally made friends via flirtation, Dagan was deeply touched by this. “He’s off doing terribly important things for Sister Eva. Probably has the best rooms in the Complex.”
“There are no good rooms in the Complex,” Hen replied with a snort. “Then again, if anyone can make something out of nothing, it’ll be Jak.”
“Is it still odd? Being here? Not just in the City but the Lantern?”
“Yeah. And also no. It’s odd because I feel like—” He opened his eyes and reached out, one dripping hand, tracing the curve of Dagan’s cheekbone gently. “I feel like there couldn’t have been a time before I knew you. Except there definitely was, and this room was a part of that. But now I’ve spent more time with you in this room than I ever did with Jak.”
“I would find that very confusing,” Dagan allowed, taking his hand and kissing it.
“I’m starting to find it very frustrating.” Hen licked his lips, then ran his wet thumb over Dagan’s lower one.
“Becoming more and more yourself every day.” Dagan kissed his hand again.
“If you mean hornier every day, then yes.”
“I did.”
“Absolutely.”
Dagan knew he probably shouldn’t, but he couldn’t resist; he sucked Hen’s thumb into his mouth and licked at the soft, meaty spot between the thumb and forefinger.
“Mmm…” Hen slipped a little lower into the water.
Dagan slipped the thumb out of his mouth. “Not too far down, darling.”
“I’m not likely to forget I’m missing half a leg, Dags, don’t worry.” Hen chuckled. “I mean, look at it.”
Dagan did, sliding the thumb back into his mouth and sucking gently all the way down. It was true, Hen wasn’t likely to forget for long, but he was in fact very likely to forget. Several times already, he’d tried to use a foot that was no longer there or claimed to feel pain in a shin that didn’t exist. The healers said that was normal; Hen seemed to find it mostly irritating, so far.
Hen pulled his thumb out slowly, then traced Dagan’s lips with it, wetting them. “You’re so beautiful,” he said with a sigh.
“Thank you, love.” Dagan returned his attention to Hen’s face to find him watching, wide-eyed. As if he’d forgotten what Dagan looked like. There was something…not quite confused, in the expression. Sad, maybe? “What is it?”
“What do you mean what is it? You were just looking at it,” Hen replied with a snort.
“It’s alright to mourn what you’ve lost,” Dagan said, not for the first time, but probably the first time since Hendrik had been totally lucid. “I’ve lost a mentor. I’m sad, too. And for a while I was angry.” He kissed Hen’s palm once more. “But now you’re on the mend, all I can think of is what we gained. I’m far happier than sad.”
“I know you don’t care. Logically. But I am different than I was when we came here.”
“Yes, sweetness.” Dagan nuzzled his hand and kissed his wrist. “We all are, but you’re forced to deal with your changes more directly, I’m afraid. I’ve got you, though.”
“I know.” Hen slipped his hand downward to toy with Dagan’s braid. “Will you take it down?”
Dagan preened even as he faked disapproval. “You really won’t be able to help yourself if I do.”
“Should’ve thought of that before you started sucking my fingers. Fucking beautiful menace.”
Dagan sat back on his heels and obliged, slowly, artfully. He had missed a lot about Hendrik, while he lay fevered and fighting for weeks. Being appreciated by him wasn’t first on the list, but it was somewhere very high, all the same. After Dagan undid the braid, he ran his fingers through his hair and shook it out, so it fell over both shoulders and down his back in gentle waves.
Hendrik twirled a piece of it, then wrapped it around his forefinger. “I’m glad you’re not angry at me anymore.”
“I never should’ve been in the first place.”
“Yeah, you should.” Hen smiled, looking almost embarrassed. “It’s funny, every time you get mad at me, something happens where I need you so much. And you still come through, even when you want to punch me through a wall.”
“Just the one time,” Dagan insisted, a flush rising into his cheeks. He felt ridiculous enough about that one time, as it was.
“No. Remember, back in the Wildcrafter Settlement? You were mad because I was being thick. I said I thought your life would move on without me after this. But you still sat with me while I cried on the edge of the woods. I didn’t even know I needed you. But you did.” Hen tugged at his hair gently.
“Oh.” Yes, Dagan had to admit, he had also been angry then. “I forgot about that. Willfully.”
“Did you also forget the part where you flirted with Gareth so I’d get—?”
“I’m trying to. Very hard,” Dagan cut in, swatting at his hand.
“Don’t.” Hendrik laughed and patted the side of his face, stroking with his thumb. “I love it all. I love that you know exactly what an idiot I am and you still love me. Enough to be here, right now, in this godsforsaken shithole of a City for almost a whole moon, now.”
“You’ve only been awake a few days and you’re already seducing me again, darling,” Dagan said with a smile. “Fine. I love that you asked Jak for little talon-rings so you could leave marks all over me right before we went into the belly of the beast.”
Hen’s face lit up. “Did he find some?”
“He gave them to me ages ago. And I cried like a baby.”
“Aw, no, they were supposed to be a good surprise.”
“They were.” Dagan chuckled and reached for the sponge, squeezing it in the water. “So good that I couldn’t be angry at you anymore, in fact.”
