‘Okay, fine,’ Jacob agreed with a huff. ‘I guess the old guy was just screwing with us with that letter.’ He shrugged. ‘Well, you’re off the hook, Ben. You don’t have to keep coming up here for walks,’ he said, with another wink, before following Darius out of the barn.
Bennett didn’t have to keep coming here. He shouldn’t keep coming here. He didn’t need another Nicole in his life. Not that Kira was anything like her, but the situation was too tempting for him. It was like a sugar addict getting a part-time job at a candy factory.
He glanced at the ceiling, where the beams had separated and the roof had caved in. Snowflakes swirled in through the opening. There was nothing else in here except for some old farm equipment and damp hay. Nothing of much use.
Except for maybe that…
Bennett spotted the old shovel and the bag of rock salt shoved into the corner of the barn. He doubted Kira had thought about how she would clear her path tomorrow. She wasn’t used to the snow.
He could just bring these down and leave them on her porch for her.
And then he would go.
He wouldn’t think about her digging herself out of her house, alone, tomorrow. Nope. He would drop these off and then go home.
It was a good plan. A compromise with himself.
He looked down at the sleeping dog in his arms and the two circling his feet.
‘Hey, Jacob, wait up.’ He followed the other men and found them loading their tiny tree onto the back of a sled. Perfect.
He put the salt and the shovel next to their tree, but kept Pudgy with him. She was too old to go bumping around on the back of a sled. They all slipped and slid their way back down the hill, with Jacob and Darius spontaneously breaking out into a very spirited version of ‘Let it Snow’ on their way down.
It reminded Bennett that this was what he’d wanted. A white Christmas. A quintessential New England December. Noah was right, the farm looked like the set of a holiday movie. But it wasn’t enough. Bennett’s thoughts kept returning to his other Christmas wish.
And his resolve to leave the snow supplies and run was weakening with every step.
‘Can you guys drop the dogs off at Logan’s for me?’ he said when they got back to the cars. Logan’s farm was on the way back to town or he wouldn’t have asked, but he didn’t know how much longer he’d be here, and he wanted the dogs taken care of.
Because, who the hell was he kidding? There was no way he was leaving until he was sure Kira was equipped for this storm.
‘Sure, Ben.’ Jacob smiled at him, shaking snow from his coat. ‘Sticking around a little longer, huh?’
Bennett didn’t reply. He was getting tired of this book club and their knowing smiles and remarks.
‘Have fun, anyway!’ Jacob sang.
Bennett bundled the dogs into the car and watched as they drove away. The dirt parking lot was completely covered in several inches of snow now, but the car made it out and onto the road safely.
Bennett stood there, the snow seeping through his jeans, thinking about how he should leave, about how bad of an idea it was to go check on Kira, about how he was repeating patterns that had only made him miserable in the past.
But the thing about bad habits was that they were very hard to break.
Chapter Fifteen
Kira was less than pleased that she had to untangle herself from her blanket pile to go answer the door. She was all hunkered down in front of the fire, ready to sit out the storm. She’d already called Iris and the few farm hands from Logan’s and told them not to bother coming today. So who could possibly be at her door?
She pulled it open to find a scowling Bennett on her porch.
‘Uh… Hi.’
‘Here.’ He pushed a rusty old snow shovel into her hands, like he was either mad at her or the shovel. She couldn’t tell.
‘Thanks? Bennett … what are you still doing here?’
His frown deepened. His cheeks were red from the cold and his pants were soaked up to the knee. What the hell had he been doing since she left him over an hour ago?
He blew out a long sigh. ‘I … well … the book club showed up.’
‘The book club?’
‘Yeah.’ He shook his head, sending clumps of snow tumbling off his hat. ‘I just wanted to make sure you had a shovel for the morning.’ He winced like this whole conversation was killing him.
‘Oh.’
‘And I brought some salt, too.’ He glanced down at the bag by his feet and then clearly noticed the shovel and bucket of rock salt that was already next to the door. The one she’d bought yesterday on her trip to the hardware store. ‘Christ. You already have one…’ He huffed a brittle laugh.
‘Yep. My first one. Bought it yesterday.’ She gave him a smile, but he still looked like a man in pain. ‘I even called Logan. He’s going to clear the parking lot for me tomorrow once he digs himself out.’ She probably didn’t need to tell him all this and she definitely shouldn’t feel as proud of herself as she was, but she was. She was figuring shit out and … apparently, she wanted Bennett to know about it.
He nodded, still frowning, still not celebrating her ability to buy her own snow shovel. Rude. ‘That’s good. Uh … I’m glad you have it under control.’ He cleared his throat. ‘I should go.’
Kira’s heart sank. ‘You can’t go.’
‘I really should.’ He gave her a grim smile. ‘You don’t need me here.’
‘So?’
He raised his eyebrows. ‘What do you mean, “so”?’
