Mena squared her shoulders and went down to the kitchens to make sure Cook had all the preparations required for the meal that night. Once she was assured all was well, she went to corner Anders about the decorations, but as usual, he had things well organized. Two footmen were already starting to weave greenery through the staircase railings, with mistletoe and holly berries scattered throughout. The scent of laurel tingled Mena’s nose. Normally that was all it took to get her engaged in the Christmas spirit, but unfortunately, she couldn’t manage to summon the appropriate joy.
Mena set her hands on her hips and surveyed the work going on about her. Everything was running smoothly, so in essence, she had nothing left to do. The attic was finished, the library was being restocked as her book orders had arrived, and even Laurence’s chamber had been cleared and renovations were beginning to take place. She’d already decided to redo the parlor, but only after the holidays were over.
So that left only one more room on her list of projects. She had intended to wait for warmer weather for it as well, but since there was no time like the present…
Mena rolled up her sleeves and walked toward the back of the house where the small, glass-enclosed conservatory was located. It took a bit of a struggle to push open the door with its rusty hinges, but she finally gained her way inside. The first thing she noticed was the musty scent of earth and old weeds. The unpleasant odor nearly caused her to regret her decision to start work now, but she was determined to do something, rather than stew in her own regrets all day.
Besides, she rather thought about starting a small, flower garden this spring, so it would have to be cleared out at some point. It was a shame that she had let it fall into such disrepair in the first place, but after Jacob’s death, she’d had little interest in anything, especially nurturing a new, healthy life. The day he died, she’d shut the door and kept it closed with firm instructions that it was to remain untouched.
And she’d kept that vow. Until today.
Three hours passed before Mena finally stood and stretched her aching back muscles. She’d been crouched down all morning, gathering up decaying plants and sending them to the rubbish bin, and then scrubbing the floor. All she had left to do was wipe down the windows and then it was time to haul in new soil, planter boxes…
A bead of perspiration trailed down her forehead, so she lifted her arm to wipe it away — just as a familiar voice broke the silence. “You’ve been quite busy today, I see.”
Mena spun around to spy Julian lounging against the doorway, his green eyes watching her steadily.
She turned and busied herself with tidying up a flowerpot. “I really must speak with Anders about letting strangers into my house without warning.”
“I’m afraid the poor man didn’t have much choice. I rather bullied my way inside.”
Mena wondered if he might have been serious, but when she glanced at him, his eyes were dancing with amusement. The sight only drove the knife deeper into her heart. She took a deep breath, her chest aching from the pain. After last night, she wasn’t sure how to act around him. Or even what to say.
Last night she’d been willing to sell her soul for just a few minutes of his time, so that she might tell him how she felt. But with the clear light of day, those mischievous doubts had returned.
After a brief pause, he asked, “Are you going to ask what I’m doing here?”
Mena frowned lightly. “I imagine you’re here to tell me that your business is concluded and you’re on your way back to America.”
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, but you’re wrong. I’m not going anywhere.”
Mena cast her gaze at the floor.
“I heard that you went to Robbie’s townhouse last night.”
“I did,” she admitted.
“Why?”
She sighed. “I had something to tell you.”
“And you don’t any longer?”
She didn’t reply.
“Mena, please. Look at me.”
She slowly lifted her eyes.
“I haven’t been completely honest with you.” He scoffed. “Actually, I haven’t been honest at all.”
She remained silent, waiting for him to continue.
He shoved a hand through his hair. “I was the one you were waiting to see at the opera last night, Mena. When I arrived, only to see you leaving in a hackney, I felt…” His throat worked convulsively. “Devastated.” He shook his head. “Then when I confronted you at the park, you seemed so…detached that I wasn’t sure I would ever win your love.” He stared at her, his green eyes bright. “You may not know this, but years ago, back in Kent, I went to your father to ask for your hand. He rejected my suit, claiming that not only had you been promised to another but that I had nothing to recommend me. I was only a vicar’s son, my father the youngest son of a baronet. I would never come into a title, while you would marry an earl. Right then, I knew that the only way I would have a chance to marry you was if I proved my worth.”
He clenched his jaw, as if the memory was still raw. “So I left and went to America. It took me a while to gain my feet, but once I did, I became rather successful. I invested in various shipping companies and eventually started my own business. By the time I felt I was invested enough, I wrote to your father, but he told me that it was too late. Two months earlier, you’d married Lord Lipscomb.”
His voice lowered. “Even though you were gone, I never stopped loving you. It was why I never married, although I did have one mistress that I might have wed, if we’d been given the chance.” Again, he swallowed heavily. “She died of typhoid fever the same year Laurence did. She was five months pregnant with our child.” He shook his head. “A year later I heard your son was one of the casualties of the war with Napoleon. I wanted to be here to comfort you, but we’d been apart for more than twenty years. Back in Kent we’d been friends, but I wasn’t sure how you would feel about me now.”
“So what brought you back to England?” Mena asked softly.
“The future,” Julian murmured. “The rail system was starting to take off here, but there were still doubts and reservations about doing the same in America, so I was sent here to investigate the matter, to convince our investors that it was worth taking the risk. It was only after my business contact in England invited me over to his house for dinner one night, and I met his wife, did I realize that the second chance I’d always wanted had just been given to me, so I came up with a plan to woo the woman I’d always loved.”
“My secret admirer,” Mena murmured, as her heart filled with joy.
Julian grinned. “I don’t suppose it’s a secret any longer.”
“I’m glad,” Mena’s lower lip trembled. “Oh, Julian.” Her eyes started to mist. “You can’t imagine how these past few days have brought new meaning to my life.” She shook her head. “And I’m not speaking of the gifts. As wonderful as they have been, all of it was unnecessary because you are the one who breathed hope back into me. After Jacob died, I was an empty shell. My grief consumed me, and even though I had Marigold to rely upon, I still felt alone.” She sighed. “Then one day, I received a dozen roses. I couldn’t even remember the time I’d gotten flowers. Laurence never was the romantic type.” Her lips twitched. “The next day I saw you, and it was as if twenty years just melted away.”
She held out her hands, which Julian took. Then she looked at his face. “All my life I’ve done the proper thing, what was expected of me. It’s time that I did something for myself.” She smiled, although a single tear trailed down her cheek. “I love you, Julian. I easily could have so many years ago during that summer, but my future had already been set for me. Now, I am free to choose my own path. I choose you, if you’ll have me.”
He raised her right hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles, before doing the same with her left. “I never did get a chance to give you my last gift.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box. Taking her left hand in his, he bent down on one knee. “Philomena Wallace, heart of my heart. Breath of my breath.” He opened the lid to reveal a solitary ruby ring in a gold setting. “Will you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?”
Mena gazed adoringly at the man before her. “Yes. Of course, I will.”
His grin could have lit up a cloudy sky. He removed the ring and carefully slid it onto her finger, and then he rose to his full height and captured her face in his hands. “Let’s seal our bargain with a kiss, shall we?”
