“My first partnering was with Koln—we’re still together,” Fenn said, carving a talon into the frozen stream. “We didn’t always see eye to eye—still don’t.” He chuckled to himself, plucking out a sliver of ice. “I might’ve been to blame. I was jealous that Lykor spent more time training him instead of me.”
Fenn’s eyes flashed back to the past. “Lykor wanted nothing to do with me because of my father.” He curled his fist and water dripped from his palm as he melted the ice. “I can’t number the times Koln and I thrashed each other to a pulp. But I discovered later that he gives it as good as he takes it.” Fenn lifted the side of his tunic, pointing to an old, wicked injury wrapping around his ribs, reaching back to his spine. “I took his eye for this.”
Speechless, Serenna gaped, jaw dropping open as she studied the puckered blemishes, a roadway of brutal scars. Settling his shirt back, Fenn barreled on, forgetting to mention how they’d reconciled their differences before what was between them developed into…more. Letting him speak, Serenna tucked that skipped story away, saving it to ask about another day.
“Koln is a lieutenant now too, so we’re not on the same patrols anymore.” Fenn idly swirled his talons across the frozen water. “But we still manage to see each other every few days at the Lagoon.”
An expression Serenna nearly considered dreamy spanned over Fenn’s face as his eyes unfocused. “And then there’s Liah. She has the most stunning—” Fenn coughed, quickly catching whatever he was going to say. He dashed a glance at her. “She and Koln hardly tolerate each other though. It’s of no help that Koln doesn’t favor females. And…” The light in Fenn’s eyes faded like a star vanishing from the sky. “I guess I don’t really see her anymore.”
Serenna bit the inside of her cheek before daring to ask, “Is she with the reavers?”
Fenn nodded. “She was there that day with the humans on the snows.”
A bleak sadness smothered Serenna, constricting her ribs for his loss. She expected insecure jealousy to ricochet around her chest for each partner named—for each person more important than her. Instead, something empathetic unfurled, her turmoil relaxed by the open truth.
She quietly said, “I’m sorry you lost both Liah and your sister Taryn to the reavers.”
As they silently watched the moons drift closer toward each other, Serenna’s heart extinguished like an ember, growing cold like the stars. Why does knowing that Fenn has an interest in me while he carries affections for others not hurt like Vesryn’s secrets? I was so jealous of Ayla.
When Fenn didn’t speak further, Serenna prompted him, if only to distract herself from her spiraling thoughts. “And what about your other partners?”
Fenn shrugged, eyes bright with mischievous guilt. “That’s it.”
Serenna sputtered, “That’s—that’s it?”
“I’ve been with others,” Fenn said almost defensively, rubbing the back of his neck. “But I’ve come to prefer something more…consistent.”
Serenna laughed, shaking her head. “Thank you for spending your evening here with me.” She placed her hand on top of his, the heat from his skin radiating into hers. “If someone had told me a few weeks ago that I’d be watching the solstice with a wraith who I consider a friend, I wouldn’t have believed them.”
Turning his claw over, Fenn’s fingers enveloped hers. Serenna studied their intertwined hands, searching for her next words.
“In a way, I’m glad I’m here because I learned the truth about your people. I only wish everyone else could too.” Each of her blinks became a battle to hold his gaze, steady like stone. The wind outside the cavern seemed to still like her heart. “But I need to be honest, like you’ve been with me. Regardless of what happens in the capital tonight…”
Losing her nerve, Serenna glanced away, wishing the frosty stars provided solace. “I think my broken heart is still with the prince. Even if I’ll never see him again.” Brushing a stray tear away, her voice cracked, strained by the vulnerability of her words. “I wouldn’t want to give those pieces to someone else.”
Serenna’s pulse leaped when Fenn leaned closer, consuming everything in her sight until all she saw was him. “I’d gladly accept just a piece if only to protect it.” He squeezed her hand, an offered comfort. “If you trusted me with a shard of your heart, I wouldn’t break it further.” His gaze dropped to her tether peeking out from her cloak, glinting between them in the starlight. “I’m sorry Lykor gave you no choice but to be with the wraith and separated you from your prince.” His fingers tightened around hers, eyes brimming with an apology that wasn’t his responsibility to give. “But you could have a life with us.”
“A life shackled to Lykor?” Serenna whispered, her voice barely audible. “A life where I’m simply used for my magic? Where I’m locked in a tower or dragged around the world?”
Dejection flashed across Fenn’s face before he withdrew. “Of course you’d wish for freedom and to have your magics back. I don’t fault you for that.” He looked on the verge of saying more.
“Would you want magic?” Serenna blurted, an idea suddenly wheeling like a swirling of snow. Fenn had mentioned it before, musing that he could use the power to help others. She couldn’t put him in a position that compromised his loyalty to Lykor, but… If I could offer him something to provide aid…
Fenn spun a ring in his brow, frowning as he watched a streak of cosmic light dart across the sky.
“What if…” Serenna began. Her voice tapered out, the pirouetting of her mind stealing her words.
She glanced over the frosty expanse, wondering if Vesryn would open a portal in the valley below. Even if he’s in Kyansari tonight, he’d travel here if he sensed me. He wouldn’t abandon me. She clung to a sliver of hope that she’d be able to inform the prince of his brother and the truth of the wraith. Vesryn would tear the capital down with his bare hands if he knew about Aesar. We could change everything.
“What if I gave you one of my abilities?” Serenna couldn’t think of a stronger incentive to encourage Fenn to remove the tether. “Like Lykor did for your father?”
Fenn’s eyes went as round as the moons.
“You could have defended yourself today,” Serenna rushed on, finding his claw to squeeze. “You could have defended me.”
She hated herself as soon those words flew from her mouth. Fenn flinched, tugging his fingers out of hers.
Heart wrenching for exploiting his protective nature, Serenna clutched Fenn’s arm. “I—I didn’t mean… I only meant…” Waging an inner war, nausea burned her stomach for leveraging his guilt, for being the cause of that shame curving his shoulders. “Magic would’ve made a difference.”
Fenn tensed, like he was ready to shake off the weight of her hand. His gaze blazed through the sleeve of her cloak, to where Larek’s claws had scraped into her skin. A whirlwind of emotions flared in Fenn’s eyes when they slowly lifted to meet hers. Serenna wondered if he could hear the deception in her words—wondered if he could hear the pounding of her guilty heart.
Fenn’s voice was quiet. Disbelieving. “Why would you offer me such a thing?” He scanned her face, seeming to scour for what she withheld.
Because I’m manipulating you to get this tether off. Serenna tightened her fingers around his strained muscles, staring so deeply into the flaming depths of his eyes. This is the only way I know how. We could save lives by uniting Centarya and the wraith. We could end this war before it gets worse.
Conflict split Serenna’s chest, but she pushed forward, abusing Fenn’s devotion to his leader. “Can’t you see the advantages of helping Lykor protect the wraith or subduing the reavers if they rise? My power isn’t useful locked away.” She frantically considered which ability she could sacrifice and manage without. “I could give you my force talent and you could be the one who clears the snow from the lifts.” The joke hung in the air, silent like the moons, as hollow as her heart.
“I don’t even know if it’s possible,” Fenn eventually said. He retreated out of her grip, clasping the key hanging around his neck.
“There’s a way to find out.” Serenna hesitated before slowly presenting her wrist. “If Aesar is still out tonight, I can ask him how to draw out my power. And if he doesn’t agree or if he’s of the same mind as Lykor and doesn’t want me untethered, you can put it back on.”
“But what about you?” Fenn’s fingers curled around hers, searching Serenna’s eyes with a deep-rooted concern that tightened her chest. “You’d become more wraith if we do this.”
Serenna’s smile was fragile, threatening to shatter, her throat too tight to form anything but hoarse words. “We’re not so different.”
Letting go, Fenn drew the chain over his neck, turning the key over and over in his palm. His brows pulled together, studying the tether on her arm. “Are you sure?”
Heart tumbling down her ribs, Serenna battled the raging hurricane of her doubt, tempted to tell him everything. I’m scared you’ll inform Lykor of the bond. So I’m taking that choice away from you and hoping I can live with myself after the prince appears.
