‘I don’t think so,’ Freddie said desperately. ‘Look, I think someone may know about the ice house, and now that I’ve got all that stuff in there, what the hell am I going to do with it?’
Christoph downed his drink. ‘I’ve told you. Just sit tight. Say nothing. Now, I have to get back to work. We’ve got to get rid of that lot before we go, and we’ve only got a few hours left.’
‘You’re leaving?’ Freddie gasped.
‘Tonight,’ said Christoph, turning to leave the room. ‘The bloody balloon’s gone up. The announcement will probably come sometime tomorrow or maybe on Sunday.’
Freddie leapt in front of him. ‘You can’t leave me here,’ he said desperately. His eyes were wild. ‘You know who my uncle is. What’s he going to say if you arrive in Berlin and tell him you left me to my fate?’
‘I’m sorry but it’s too late, old man,’ said Christoph, his voice softening slightly. ‘We’ve only got hours to get out ourselves. We’re sailing from Harwich first thing in the morning.’ He took Freddie’s arm and ushered him towards the door. ‘Look, if you want to come with us, go back home and tidy up any loose ends. There’s a couple of ships heading for Holland tomorrow. We might be lucky enough to get you on board.’
‘But I’ll need tickets,’ Freddie said desperately.
Christoph took in a breath as his nostrils flared. ‘Gunther,’ he shouted and, as the junior secretary appeared in the doorway, he added, ‘You see to this, will you? Just give him what he wants.’
Out on the street, Freddie was so angry it took a few moments to collect his thoughts. He kicked himself that he’d left all his paperwork and his passport back home. If only he’d had them in his coat pocket, he would have simply left his wife and gone. Even now he toyed with the idea of going straight back to Worthing and telling his mother-in-law he was just popping out for a minute before disappearing for good. But then it occurred to him that she’d probably set up a hue and cry, which could mean he’d be stopped before he even boarded ship. Besides, Christoph said he should tidy up any loose ends, and he had one which was more than an irritation. Once that was sorted, he would be free to leave. Harwich was about three hours from London and the return trip to Worthing about the same. He glanced at his watch. There was still time to do it, if he could find Pearl quickly enough.
As luck would have it, when Milly knocked on the door of Muntham Court, her mother was alone in the house. After a lot of thought, Milly was sure she should tell her mother and sister of her suspicions. They might not listen; in fact they would most likely be horrible, but Milly knew she would never forgive herself if something happened to them because of her silence.
Agatha seemed far from pleased to see her daughter. ‘What do you want?’ she said curtly.
‘I just wanted to see how you are.’ They stood motionless, just staring at each other. ‘Can I come in?’
Reluctantly Agatha stepped aside. The hallway was littered with suitcases.
‘Going away?’ Milly asked.
‘Pearl’s husband is taking us to his ancestral home in Germany.’
‘Is that wise?’ Milly blurted it out without thinking. Her mother gave her a cold glare. ‘I’m sorry,’ she added quickly. ‘I didn’t mean to interfere.’
‘Then don’t,’ said Agatha, turning towards the sitting room.
‘It’s just that I worry about you and Pearl,’ said Milly, following her. ‘What with all this talk of war . . .’
‘Freddie assures us that’s just what it is. Talk.’
‘When do you go?’
‘Tonight,’ said Agatha, pouring herself a whisky. ‘We sail from Harwich in the morning.’
Milly stood with her mouth open. They were leaving the country and they hadn’t bothered to tell her? How could they? ‘When will you be back?’ she asked faintly.
‘Oh, we shan’t,’ Agatha said as she sat down and gracefully crossed her legs. ‘Why should we? This country is finished.’
‘How can you say that, Mother? This is where you were born. You do realise that Germany will soon declare war on Britain.’
‘Don’t be a fool, girl,’ said Agatha. ‘Herr Hitler has said on more than one occasion that if Britain rests with Germany, war will not come again.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘If we don’t interfere,’ Agatha snapped irritably, ‘Hitler will not declare war.’
Milly closed her eyes. It was no use. Her mother was adamant.
‘Anyway,’ Agatha continued, ‘we shall be fine. We shall live with Freddie. Did you know that he’s a baron?’ She paused, then added, ‘Of course you did. So you can have your damned house back right now; no need to wait until you’re twenty-one.’
Milly’s throat tightened as she lowered herself down into a chair. ‘Why, Mother?’ she asked. ‘Why do you hate me so much? What did I do to make you feel this way?’
Agatha gulped her drink in one go.
‘Please, Mother,’ said Milly. ‘I have to know. Whatever it is, I deserve to be told.’
Agatha leaned back in her chair. ‘I never wanted you in the first place. You were a means to an end, that’s all.’
Milly blinked and pushed up her glasses. ‘I-I don’t understand.’
Agatha sighed. ‘I married your father to secure a future for Pearl and me.’ She reached for the cigarette box and took one out. ‘I made sure I was already pregnant with you before we got married. I never loved Charles and he knew it but, fool that he was, he still took me on.’
Milly’s heartbeat quickened. ‘But you had Pearl before me. Why didn’t you marry my father before she was born?’
Her mother put the cigarette between her lips and lit it. Blowing the smoke above her head she said, ‘Since you’ve asked me, I may as well tell you everything.’
Milly could feel herself beginning to tremble inside. She was afraid and yet she had to know the truth.
‘I was in love with Charles’s best friend; the most wonderful man who ever drew breath. We were going to marry but the war came. He was killed.’ Agatha’s eyes moistened as she smoothed down the folds of her skirt. ‘The army sent Charles to tell me. I was devastated, not only because Simon had died, but because by now I knew I was pregnant. I was well aware that my parents would disown me if they found out, so I went away to have Pearl. But when she was born, I knew I couldn’t give her up. There was too much of Simon in her, you see. Charles kept in contact, but I needed more than that. I needed support, financial support, marriage.’ Agatha rose to her feet and went to the window. With her back to Milly she said, ‘So I let him seduce me, and when I was pregnant with you, Charles being Charles, he offered to do the decent thing.’ She snorted. ‘He always was a bit of an ass, wasn’t he?’
Milly was staring at the floor. It all sounded so cold and calculating; so loveless. Her mother turned slightly. ‘I loved Simon. I only ever loved Simon. When you were born, I made it clear I didn’t want your father ever again, but I told him that if he wanted to be a part of your life, he would have to accept it.’ She turned back to face Milly. ‘And there you have it. You want to know why I was distant towards you? I only ever wanted it to be Pearl and me. I never wanted you in the first place. You were, as I said, simply a means to an end.’
