‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean, you should talk to her.’
‘No, I don’t think so.’
Her mother was stunned. ‘What? You think you’re just going to carry on and pretend it didn’t happen?’
Poppy thought it over. ‘She knows, but she doesn’t know I know. If she doesn’t bring it up, I can just... not.’
Her mother folded up the jeans, sighing. ‘Good luck with that.’
‘Mum! I need your support!’
‘And you’re getting it.’
‘No, I’m not! You’re supposed to tell me whatever I do is fine.’
Her mother tutted and smiled. ‘Oh, Pop. That’s a total misunderstanding of my job,’ her mother told her.
‘Then what is your job?’ Poppy demanded.
‘To lovingly prepare you for reality. And the reality is that she’s your friend, and you’ve been as thick as thieves for months. And now there’s this big thing in the middle of it. It’s not just going to go away, as much as you might want it to.’
Poppy was furious at her mother. She’d only wanted a comforting lie, just one beautiful little fib. But it wasn’t her way.
‘Mum... What if she hates me now?’ Poppy asked her mother.
‘She won’t.’
‘How do you know?’
‘I don’t. But I believe it. Norah’s a good kid. She’s not going to turn her back on you over this.’
Poppy sat up on the sofa, her spine functioning again. ‘But she won’t like me like that, will she?’
Her mother stopped folding and sat down next to her. She slid an arm around her shoulder. Her mother wasn’t a big hugger, but when Poppy needed it, she always seemed to know. ‘I don’t know. But for her own sake, I hope she does. She’d be lucky to have you.’
‘Thanks, Mum,’ Poppy said, her bottom lip wobbling.
Now
Poppy was in the same living room where she’d come out to her mum, watching TV with Luna, some movie with Barbie and unicorns. It was nice to remember her mother in that crucial moment of her own young life. The woman could not be thrown by anything. Poppy could have announced she’d murdered someone, and her mother would have simply grabbed a shovel.
But now Poppy was the mum, and it was her job to be that for little Luna. Be the woman of iron. Poppy didn’t feel so tough, though. She missed her mother. It had been two years now. She could have used her perspective on things. She’d have known the shove to give Poppy.
Looking back, though, Poppy had to wonder. Her mum wasn’t infallible. She wasn’t superwoman. Maybe all she’d done was show strength because she knew that it was needed. Maybe she hadn’t always felt that sure of herself. Maybe she was playing the role she had to.
‘Mummy, can I have a magazine today?’ Luna asked.
Poppy immediately tensed up. ‘Err...’
‘There’s a new Frozen one,’ Luna told her. ‘Agnes at school said it’s got a bracelet on it.’
Those bloody magazines. They were branded rags from popular kids' shows and movies that came with plastic toys attached to the front. The magazine was just a front to sell fifty pence worth of plastic crap for six quid. Luna loved them, of course.
‘I don’t know, Lu.’
‘Pleeeease, Mummy? I didn’t even get the last one. And it had lipstick,’ Luna complained.
The wheedling Poppy cracked like an egg. ‘OK.’
‘Can we get it right now?’ Luna asked.
Poppy nodded. She needed the break from Barbie and her money worries anyway.
They walked into the square and Luna dragged her straight to a newsagent, where her head was immediately turned by the amount of choice.
Poppy watched as Luna's attention was drawn to a bright pink magazine with a sparkly charm bracelet on the cover. "Can I get this one instead?" Luna asked eagerly, holding up the glitzy publication.
‘I thought you wanted Frozen?!’
‘This one’s got unicorns.’
Poppy hesitated. The bracelet was made of bad metal and would probably turn Luna's wrist green. But her daughter's eyes were lit up with anticipation.
‘Alright, let's get that one,’ Poppy relented with a weak smile.
Luna beamed and clutched the magazine to her chest as they brought it to the counter. They passed an old lady who smiled at Luna.
