And the crew? They were family, too. Perhaps not in the deep, spiritual way he felt Theo and Yarrow were his family, but he’d felt more valued and protected by them in the past few months than he had by his biological family since he was small. In his gut, he knew they would kill for him. And he would do the same.
Realizing this, Zander’s heart slowed, his anxiety melting slightly under his conviction. Hell be damned. No God worth his salt would make creatures with such a great capacity for love without expecting some violence. If he was damned for protecting those he loved, so be it.
Zander realized he was holding Ace too tightly—he relaxed his arms around her and began to focus more on his surroundings.
He was in Ace’s bedroom. The only other time he’d been there was to go over travel plans, and then he’d taken pains not to gawk at her belongings. Now, he took the opportunity to study the room and its many small treasures. A well-worn tapestry with geometric patterns hung on the wall in front of him. Beneath it hung a small charcoal drawing of a naked woman’s silhouette—he recognized it as one of Jubal’s sketches.
Something near the floor caught his eye. It was letters carved into the wood. The writing was large and unruly—a child’s handwriting.
MOM. DAD. ARACELY.
Zander smiled at the tiny time capsule. He had wondered if this sloop was the same one she and her parents sailed when she was a child. He liked knowing this is where she spent her childhood. He found a strange comfort knowing where she’d been, as if her whereabouts had been a question that burned inside of him his whole life.
Then he thought of her kneeling, cleaning up the pool of blood on the deck.
This place was her home. And now, having made the choice of a lifetime—having jumped from land into the cold bite of the ocean in pursuit of love and adventure—it was his home, too.
In that moment, Zander resolved himself to his choice. Perhaps he was playing at being a pirate, he thought. Perhaps this wasn’t his adventure at all. But that no longer bothered him, because it was hers.
If his choice was to live alone, each day tedious and predictable, or to sit on the sidelines and watch the woman he loved be the main character in her own adventure, he would choose the latter. Even if death beckoned at every turn.
Unbeknownst to Zander, our hero would soon have an adventure of his very own.
8
The journey to Azores lasted ten days. The stop was brief, much of it focused on avoiding the Portuguese naval ships that filled the waters around the small island chain. The crew found what supplies they could and continued on toward Portugal, a journey that would last six days. After resting in Portugal, they would head South toward Morocco, where Ace promised to find Zander the most delicious tagine he’d ever tasted. Zander had no idea what tagine was, but he was excited to find out.
As they neared Portugal and the promise of several days of rest and recreation, the mood of the crew became considerably lighter. Everyone was eager to spend time on land, and to spend the considerable sum of gold they’d recently acquired. Zander heard all sorts of plans from the men about what they would do. Some envisioned fine tailored clothes and good food. Others daydreamed about brothels and endless cups of wine.
Zander dreamed of nothing but Ace.
As he gazed at her now, her feet up and her eyes focused on the book in her hands, he imagined how luxurious it would feel to have her to himself, no matter how briefly. He’d been staying in her cabin every night for two weeks, long enough for the crew’s jokes to die down. And while he marveled at the fortune of getting to share her bed each night, interruptions were plentiful. He looked forward to staying in bed for as long as they wanted without any pirates barging in.
They would dock in Portugal for four nights—long enough, Ace said, for the crew to unwind “without getting too comfortable.” Comfort was a risk she’d seemed particularly concerned about since the raid on the Spanish vessel and the captain who recognized her face.
When he’d asked her the morning after the raid about the captain, she hadn’t told him much.
“That man,” he’d said to her. “He knew you. And you knew that boat as well.”
Ace had taken a deep breath then, like she was bracing herself. For just a moment, something had brimmed behind her eyes, like a wave about to crest over the top of a cliff. But then it was gone, the sudden furrow of her brow pushing it back down from whence it came. When she took his hand and spoke, her voice warbled with the weight of regret.
“There are things in my past I’ve worked very hard to leave behind,” she’d said. “Things I’d rather forget happened. That man knew me during a part of my life I never want to think about again.” She’d brought his hand to her heart then, reminding him of the night in the cave. “Someday, I’ll tell you all about it. But not today. Today, we sail.”
It felt like a promise, and that had been good enough for him. At least, he’d said as much to her.
But the questions he had nagged at him. What didn’t he know about this woman he loved so blindly? She already knew more about him than he did about her. She asked questions every night as they lay in her bed. Questions about his childhood, his family, his work. He wasn’t sure how much more he could tell her about growing up as one of eight kids, working since he was ten to earn money, his father drinking it away, and his mother sleeping all of the time. Looking back at his past, it all seemed grey in comparison to his life now, like he was finally living in color. Nothing else had ever been real.
When Zander asked Ace questions about her life, she kept her answers brief, always insisting she’d rather hear more about him. If he could find a topic that excited her—books, for instance, or her adventures as a pirate—she’d talk for ages, and he would soak up every bit of it. He lived vicariously through her stories, visiting jungles and forests, palaces and temples, busy markets and abandoned beaches. They were all places she promised to take him.
They talked at length about ideas—what may lay out there in the wide world they hadn’t discovered yet, for instance. They talked about religion, government, art. Ace had a subversive approach to so many aspects of life, Zander found himself questioning everything he thought he knew. The world grew larger, more mysterious, and with it he grew as well.
She also read to him. He’d never been good at reading, having only learned to read when he neared adulthood. Right now, she was reading from a book about a man stranded on a deserted island. She sat in her chair, her feet propped on her desk as she read. Zander sat on the bed, leaning against the wall, his eyes closed as he listened.
She reached the end of a passage and stuffed a dried leaf between the pages to mark her place before closing it. She looked at him expectantly, smiling.
“You were right about the story,” he said. “I like it.”
Ace’s smile widened in satisfaction, and she set the book down.
“It’s my favorite,” she said. “My father gave it to me as a gift shortly before he died.”
“Tell me about your parents,” Zander said. Ace had a way of avoiding talk about her parents, but Zander felt a sudden urge to ask her about them again.
“They were wonderful,” she said. The tension that normally lined her eyes when she mentioned her parents was absent. “My mother was very keen, and almost always working. My father was always making friends with strangers. They were both gentle and good natured. And fun. We had a lot of fun.” Ace’s smile was wistful. “They would have liked you.”
Zander just smiled, hoping she’d continue. After leaving her chair to come sit beside him on the bed, she did.
“They had high hopes for me, my parents. I think they regretted raising me on the ocean. They thought it made me hard when the world expected me to be soft. When we moved to Spain, they tried to correct their mistake by settling down and entering high society. They took on the role of the people we used to sell to. It was almost like a game for them, playing at being respectable, landowning merchants. I got a more formal education, which I loved. But in the end, I just couldn’t meet their expectations.”
Zander put his hand over hers.
“What happened to them?”
“It was a fire,” she said quietly. “They both died in a fire, and within weeks of their deaths I’d run off and become a pirate.”
Zander leaned in so he could kiss Ace’s temple, then her cheek.
“Quite lucky for me you did,” he said softly, squeezing her hand.
