“Oh, so you guys are locked up in here, are you?” asked Norm.

“Yeah, the hotel manager didn’t like it that I gave a free concert for the benefit of his guests,” Harriet lamented. “I guess he wants to monopolize all the entertainment, so he can ask for more money. Free entertainment clearly isn’t part of his business plan.”

“I would open the door for you guys, but I’m afraid I don’t have the strength,” said the fly. “Though I could always ask a friend—or a couple of friends.”

“More flies, you mean?” I asked. “I don’t see how that is going to do us any good, Norm.”

“Except when they show up in considerable numbers,” said Harriet. “Like, a couple of thousand flies? That would get the manager’s attention, wouldn’t it?”

We all shared a smile, and Norm said, “I’m on it!” And moments later was buzzing through that same ventilator grille again, on his way to carry out another important mission.

“So great that the murder has been solved,” said Dooley. “Though I wonder why they did it.”

“Probably because the prince proved to be a tough customer,” said Brutus. “He didn’t want to buy their bug spray so they killed him.” He shrugged. “That’s what you get when you read all those books on cold calls and the tough approach to sales and taking no for an answer.”

“It’s probably a new sales technique,” Harriet suggested. “When you can’t close, you threaten to shoot the customer. And when he still doesn’t want to play ball, you kill him.”

I didn’t think this approach would prove a big hit, but then I’m not a salesperson, of course, and I’ve never taken a sales course. Maybe it was de rigueur right now to use tough measures when trying to make a sale. Though I still found it a little odd that this couple, of all people, would have killed the prince. Especially since they claimed to have been standing outside the door when the guy was being shot. Unless they had lied about that, of course. Killers often show a certain reluctance to tell the truth. I guess it comes with the territory.

“How long do you think we’ll have to wait here, Max?” asked Dooley. The four of us had jumped up onto the manager’s desk to have a better overview, and we sat on top of a stack of documents—possibly contracts that needed to be signed, and bills that needed to be paid. Some of them bore the monikers ‘past due,’ ‘overdue’ or even ‘final notice.’

“Well, Norm will have to amass his troops, so that can take a while,” I said. “And also, he has to guide them to this office, which will also take a little time.”

“It won’t be long,” said Harriet confidently. “There are flies everywhere, and they’ll be only too happy to assist a fellow fly in his attempt to spring us from jail.”

A sort of buzzing sound now reached my ears, and I got the impression that Norm was on his way. Very soon an entire horde of flies were pouring through that grille above the door, and the room was starting to fill up with the winged creatures. There were hundreds of them—possibly thousands, and as the four of us hunkered down on the desk to await further proceedings, Norm positioned himself in front of us, a triumphant expression on his tiny face. “Well, what did I tell you? I was going to get you out of here, and I’ve kept my promise!”

“Are these all friends of yours, Norm?” asked Harriet, a sort of awe in her voice.

“Friends? No, this is my family!”

“But… there must be thousands of them.”

Norm shrugged. “I have a fairly small family, but I still love them, you know. Hey, you gotta work with what you’ve got, right?”

We all marveled at the sheer volume of flies filling up the room, and when Norm told us this was just his closest relatives, with the rest of his family all lingering outside the door, I didn’t want to be in the manager’s shoes right now, with his hotel nicely filling up with flies.

I just hoped he’d get the message and open that darn door!

CHAPTER 14

Vesta and Scarlett had managed to get their usual seat on the Star Hotel’s alfresco dining area, and had ordered their usual drinks: a cappuccino for Scarlett and a hot chocolate with plenty of foam and chocolate sprinkles for Vesta. And she was just about to reveal her grand scheme to get rid of those annoying bugs that were eating the lawn when a fly landed on her spoon. She waved it away with an annoyed gesture.

“Isn’t it a little too early in the season to have flies harassing us?” she asked as she watched the annoying insect with a baleful eye.

“It’s never too early in the season for flies, Vesta,” said Scarlett as she took a dainty sip from her cappuccino. “So what’s all this about a new bug spray that Tex is trying out?”

“Well, it doesn’t work, that’s the long and the short of it.” She saw that another fly had descended from the rafters and had taken up position on the table and was eyeing her hot cocoa with a longing eye—or a thousand longing eyes, since flies have those weird facet eyes that make them see a lot of stuff at the same time. A pretty cool feature. Even though she wasn’t a big fan of flies—who is?—she had to admit she had a certain admiration for the creatures.

“Okay, so the bug spray doesn’t work?” Scarlett prompted when she faltered once again.

“Hm? Oh, yeah, it doesn’t. And now our plants are all being devoured by these weird-looking beetles. And so I was thinking that I could ask the cats to open negotiations with the bugs. Maybe convince them to pass along to greener pastures, you know.”

“Can they do that?”

“Oh, absolutely. I mean, there’s nothing those cats of mine can’t do. They’re very clever and extremely resourceful.”

“You’re so lucky that you can talk to your cats,” said Scarlett, not for the first time. “I wish I could talk to Clarice. She’s such a sweetheart, and I’ve grown so fond of her, so if only we could chat, that would be amazing. She could tell me all about her hopes and dreams.”

“I still contend that you could learn their language,” said Vesta. “It’s probably just a knack you can pick up. Like driving a bicycle or parallel parking.”

“I can’t parallel park for the life of me,” said Scarlett. “And as far as riding a bike goes, I haven’t done that in years.”

“But surely you could learn to talk to your cat, couldn’t you? Look, all you have to do is listen very carefully when they’re trying to tell you something. Really focus, you know.”

“I’ve tried,” said Scarlett. “Lord knows I’ve tried. But it’s all just gibberish to me, honey.”

“Okay, I’m going to talk in cat language now. Listen very carefully, all right?” and she proceeded to tell her friend that her hot cocoa was very delicious.

Scarlett laughed. “That sounded so funny!”

“Well, it wasn’t funny,” said Vesta. “Let’s try again. Listen carefully to what I’m saying. And try to listen with your heart, not your mind, if that makes sense.”

Scarlett made a face. “I don’t even know what that means.”

“It means that you can’t look at this rationally. It’s a knack, something you need to work on—one moment you don’t understand a single thing, and the next you’ve got it. Okay? Here we go.” This time she told her friend that there were too many flies around for the time of year and she was going to make a complaint to the hotel manager if he didn’t get a handle on things and remedy the situation. She eyed her friend expectantly. “So what did I say?”

“Um… that you’re hungry and you want a cookie?”

“No!” she sighed. “You’re not trying hard enough, honey. Do you even want to do this?”

“Of course I want to do this!” she said. “But it’s difficult, you know.”

“It’s not difficult. It’s easy. Okay, one more time. Listen carefully.”

“I am listening carefully with my ears and my heart and whatever else.”

“Okay, here goes.” But before she could launch into another sentence spoken in the language of cats, a dozen flies all attacked her cup of hot chocolate at once, and as she watched in dismay, she saw that several of them managed to end up floating on top of her chocolate! “Oh, my God!” she said. “Did you see that? A mass suicide attempt!”

“Death by drowning in chocolate milk,” said Scarlett as she made a face. “Fish them out, the poor creatures.”

“I will not fish them out!” said Vesta. “They did this to themselves!”

“Fish them out I’m telling you!” And when Vesta didn’t make a move, she proceeded to use her little spoon to fish out the flies and save their lives. “Always be kind to animals,” she explained.

“Flies are not animals,” said Vesta. “They’re bugs, and not the best bugs either. They spread all kinds of diseases, didn’t you know? One minute ago they’re traipsing around Farmer Giles’s cows, feasting on their poop and urine, and the next they’re all over my hot chocolate! It’s disgusting, that’s what it is.” She pushed her cup away. “I’m not drinking this—no way.”