Flash – endless concrete skyscrapers.
Flash – #newyork1950s.
Flash. Flash. Flash.
“Ava,” I say.
“Yes Ms. van Kamp?” She comes in the room looking different from before, less than perfect. There’s a pimple on her forehead, a large white head pressing out from a glowing red base.
Flash – Silky smooth.
Flash – Krakatoa.
“What do you see outside?” I say. She ambles to the window, limping slightly. She shrugs.
“Buildings?”
“Nothing unusual?”
“Nothing,” she says.
“Thank you Ava. You can go.” I sigh.
#whyisitalwaysme
When she leaves, I message Dsense corp. Five seconds later (poof) they project a representative over the intercerebral computer.
“It’s not an error with the iPerceive app. It must be a problem with your operating system ma’am,” she says. “Turn iPerceive off.”
“You can do that?”
“Do what?”
“Turn iPerceive off,” I say. She winks.
“You’d be surprised how many people don’t know that. But then again, why in God’s name, would you want to turn it off? Anyway, if you have it on while it’s glitching, it can be dangerous.”
“Dangerous?”
“Yes, just between you and me, a client jumped in Niagra Falls last year thinking the water was cotton candy. Anyway, have the InComp run an update tonight while you sleep. That should solve the problem.”
“I’m not paying for services this month,” I say.
She is as sweet as strawberries. “Here at Dsense corp customer satisfaction is key. You won’t be charged for services for the next two months. Plus we’ll...” She pauses, scanning through her records, trying to find an app or addon that I don’t have. “...we’ll unlock AllGourmet level 5 for two months.”
“Fine,” I say.
I stare out the window. The shadows of concrete monstrosities darken the streets below. It’s depressing, like being smothered with a soiled pillow.
“Serotonin levels decreasing. Go ahead and take the day off,” advises LifeCoach app. It’s good advice, and I should follow it. Since subscribing to LifeCoach my self-satisfaction levels have increased 523%, according to LifeCoach app. A message blinks from the dark streets:
@rickstock538: U buy?
I exhale, and LifeCoach tells me about the dangers of critically low neurotransmitters.
@laurenvankamp923: Technical problems, Plz take account till 2morrow! #vactionday
•
I board a transporter. Without iPerceive, darkness fills streets where sunlight formerly shone. There are considerably fewer flowers than usual, considerably fewer birds too. In fact, I realise, no birds and no flowers; it’s all trash and beggars, concrete and darkness.
I get home, and in the place of the #operasingingfirehydrant is a beggar. He’s young, the left half of his face is scar tissue, his eyes are sunken, and his cheek bones are too sharp. Instead of singing opera, he’s begging. He wants food. A wave of crumminess sweeps over me. LifeCoach calmly informs me about dangerous levels of something or other. I flip iPerceive back on.
Flash – The Barber of Seville.
Flash – homeless beggar.
Flash – Count Almaviva.
Flash – beggar.
iDentify kicks in:
*Ping – Sergeant Steven Johnson, 32, earned a Silver Star and a Purple Heart in the second battle of Pyongyang...
I interrupt the facial recognition app. Wait, a second battle of Pyongyang? When did that happen?
*Ping – The Second battle of Pyongyang began on April...
