“It’s a freak show.”
“It is not.”
“You told me that you hated that feeling! And that it was forceful and controlling—”
“Not yours. It’s not always like that, and I was wrong to only tell you that side of it. But there’s another side, too. Your aura is also the essence of who you are, Jae—your true, unfiltered self all around me and communicating with me. Calling to me. It’s pure and beautiful and I love it. It feels good to me.” I finally have eye contact, so I take advantage and say, “Can we please try? I think we can absolutely do this, as long as we go slowly, and you truly forgive me for hurting you. Can you?”
Now that he’s been honest with me and aired his grievances, I know we can do this. He’s already less tense, and even though there are still hurdles to overcome, I can finally see the finish line in the distance. Somehow, I already know what the promised land looks like, and it is flowing with milk and honey. It is truly good.
When he nods, I exhale a breath that I didn’t even realize I was holding.
“Yes,” he says. “I forgive you… but don’t touch me until I figure out how to control this thing inside me.”
I bite my lip and look away from him because I do not want to make that promise. And I could help him learn and manage it, if he let me. Is he serious?
“Jun?”
I whip my head to look at his angelic face all frowned up. He’s dead serious. Fuck. “Alright. I won’t. Except…”
“What?”
“I have another surprise for you. To finish it, well, I might be required to touch you.”
Jae raises his eyebrow. “What are you talking about?”
“I have a suit for you. It’s almost finished, but I need you to try it on so I can make sure the fit is perfect. I estimated your height, but it seems I was an inch off.”
He sits back slightly, laughing. “You’re telling me that you’ve tailored an entire suit for me without my physically being present for measurements? How is that possible?”
I shrug. “This is what I do, and I’ve been doing it for decades. Besides, I’m quite familiar with the intimacies and dimensions of your body, aren’t I?” I’m staring into his blue-rimmed hazelnut eyes, and in a pleasant turn, he doesn’t immediately look away from me. He matches my hooded gaze, but then smiles in a knowing way as he stands from the bed.
“Fair,” he says. “I need to respond to some emails for work, and I have meetings this evening. I’m trying to squeeze everything in before the flight tomorrow so I can be offline in Milan. I’ll try the suit on a little later today.”
“Sounds fine. I’ll make some coffee?”
“Cheers. If the weather stays clear, let’s walk out to the lake for lunch.”
“I would love that.”
He smiles as he walks past me, heading toward the door. Lulú, who has been curled up in the center of the bed this entire time, suddenly pops up, hops off the bed and pads through the door behind him. I shake my head. Traitor.
Milan
Forty-Six
Jae
“You can let Lulú out into the garden if she wants to go, Audrey. She’s… quite intelligent, and Jun is assuring me that she won’t get lost.”
Glancing out of the car window, Lake Como is a sparkling expanse of turquoise as we zip past. Across the water, the mountains are green and high, chock full of trees in multiple shades and set against a pristine blue sky.
It’s unbelievable that I’m in Italy, riding in the back of this luxurious town car in a custom-made suit and driving toward a place called Villa del Balbianello. I did an Internet search of the property, and it looks like something out of a multi-million-dollar romance movie that is a hit with audiences everywhere. The house we’re staying at (someone Giovanni knows) is also ridiculous. Correction, not a house. It’s a medieval castle. Our bathroom is like if you dropped a large freestanding bathtub into the middle of a stylish greenhouse.
“Yes, all that is fine. Thank you for checking on her,” I say into the phone. “Don’t hesitate to call if you need something… Yes, we’ll be back on Saturday… Okay, thanks, Audrey.”
“Is everything alright?” Junichi asks. He’s sitting beside me in the back seat. His suit jacket is a deep tan color, but his trousers and vest are black over a starched white shirt. The lapels have a black paisley design. As expected, it’s all fashionable as hell, but subtle. The suit he’s made for me is classic black, the only deviation being my tie and pocket square, which are the same rich tan color as Junichi’s jacket. I laughed when I saw him, but honestly… it’s nice, isn’t it? Plus, if I get lost, it’s a little bit like “please return to chaperone with matching jacket.”
“Yes,” I say. “Audrey is just nervous about the cat getting lost or attacked by wildlife.”
Junichi sits back, adjusting his long legs, and I glance down at his beautiful, shiny black Oxfords. “Lulú might outlive all of us, and she can defend herself. Audrey has nothing to worry about.”
“I suppose so, considering even your average cat has nine lives. How many more for a vampire cat?”
Junichi grins, nodding, then looks over and meets my eyes. “Are you nervous?”
“Yes. All of this is very surreal.”
“How so?”
“I feel out of place. But… I don’t know. I always have. Never quite fitting in anywhere. And now I’m here. It’s preposterous.”
“Well,” Jun says, clasping his hands in the gap of his legs. “You’ve always had dormant purebred energy inside you. You were trying to live your life as a human, but that wasn’t exclusively what you were.”
“Maybe. But there are other layers, too. Like, when I was a kid in London and going to school, I couldn’t ever find my footing. I was a bit too swirly for the white kids but not quite Asian enough for the others. When we moved to Bristol and I met Cy, I felt a little more settled, but then Cy and I have our own host of issues, don’t we?”
Junichi breathes in a laugh. “You have an interesting friendship, without question.”
Glancing out of the window again, we’re driving down a narrow road hooded with cypress and pine trees. The villa stands before us, large and square like a stucco palace. There’s a long line of cars toward the front, and I can see fancifully dressed vampires stepping out of their vehicles and heading inside. The hum of all their energies radiates against my skin. If I focus, I can pinpoint my senses on any particular one. If I don’t, all I sense and smell is Junichi. It’s like always being covered by a soft, lavender-scented blanket, but if I want, I can lift up the edge and peek outside.
