Lynette turned to the bowl on her bedside table and popped a piece of mango into her mouth. As the cold, sweet fruit dissolved on her tongue, she gave Yulia a small smile. “Maybe, let’s see.”
Irma said she had exciting news for Yulia the next time they met.
Apparently, Sabbir had told Wati, who then told Irma, that his friend, Kamrul, was attracted to Yulia but was too shy to ask her out. They wanted to arrange a date for the both of them to get to know each other better.
Initially, Yulia brushed it off. She told Irma that she just wanted to focus on doing her job well so as to earn the money she needed and head home as soon as she could. She didn’t want any distractions, and besides, the agent had specifically warned them against becoming romantically involved with any of the men here. It would be sure to lead them to some sort of trouble or other.
As the weeks went by, Yulia found herself frequently thinking about Kamrul and his bright, gentle eyes. She wondered what he was like, what had led him to Singapore and how his life had been before he came here. Coupled with Irma’s persistence, Yulia eventually relented and agreed to have a meeting set up by Wati and Sabbir.
Yulia and Kamrul met on a Sunday afternoon at the Botanic Gardens.
It was Yulia’s first time there. At the beginning, Yulia felt extremely uneasy being there with Kamrul, as if they were trespassing on someone else’s land. After some time walking in silence along the pathways, they reached an open clearing, where groups of women were relaxing on picnic mats. One group was laughing and talking over Filipino music that was playing from a portable radio, while a young woman in another group was strumming a guitar and singing in Bahasa Indonesia. Yulia recognised the song and began humming along.
Smiling shyly, Kamrul pointed to a spot in the shade, where they sat and started to chat. The only common language between Yulia and Kamrul was English, which wasn’t the first language for either of them. At first, they struggled to make conversation, but soon found ways of expressing themselves that could be understood by the other. Like Yulia, Kamrul hadn’t been one to seek out city life. His family circumstances had left him with no choice but to come to Singapore at the age of twenty-two, in search of a better future for his family and himself. Unlike Yulia, he was more realistic about his prospects. He understood that the odds were against him, and as much as he missed home, he didn’t have any hopes of returning anytime soon—not until he had earned enough to pay off his family’s debts, build them a proper home in the village and set up a small, self-sustaining business in Bangladesh.
Sitting there with Kamrul in the open and watching him as he related his story and aspirations, Yulia felt a strange sense of calmness—and perhaps, if she allowed herself to be honest, even happiness.
Although she would never admit it, Lynette heeded Yulia’s advice and made the first move to speak to Caleb. One conversation led to another, and soon they found themselves texting each other and chatting on the phone daily. Within a few weeks, the news travelled to the rest of the class—she was officially Caleb’s girlfriend. Lynette was radiant with bliss. Caleb was her first boyfriend, and would surely be her last. They had so much in common, and she could already envision them getting married and spending the rest of their lives together.
Since they became a couple, Lynette would hang out with Caleb instead of heading home after school. They would go to Orchard Road, walk around in the malls, huddle together in their usual corner booth seat at McDonald’s, catch the latest blockbuster movie—remaining in each other’s company until dusk fell and he accompanied her home. Her mother didn’t know about Caleb; she would be enraged if she found out. Yulia knew everything that was happening, but Lynette knew her secret was safe with her.
Yulia continued to see Kamrul after their first meeting. She felt an affinity with him, and with each Sunday that they spent together, they developed a growing affection and closeness to each other—so much so that one day, Irma started teasing her about having a boyfriend. Yulia blushed and tried to shrug it off, but her cousin was indefatigable. It reminded her of the times they had giggled while talking about the boys in their village, discussing who was the most handsome and who they were likely to marry when they grew up.
Yulia confessed that she enjoyed Kamrul’s company. He was a kind, honest and hardworking person who could empathise with her struggles, and she admired those qualities in him. But she was unsure about getting into a relationship here. The notion of it seemed so out of bounds to her, and she didn’t want to put her job at risk.
Irma snorted. “Yulia, you’re only young once. Who knows when you can return home? It’s difficult to find a good man, be it in Indonesia or in Singapore. Trust me, I know what I’m talking about. If you like Kamrul, you should go for it!”
Stirred by Irma’s words, Yulia decided to be less restrained with herself. She began meeting Kamrul more often and in her state of exhilaration, even agreed to meet him at the void deck of her employers’ block on some weekday evenings, for a short while, after he had finished his shift for the day and before Madam and Sir returned from work.
Once, when Lynette was confiding in her about her relationship with Caleb, Yulia, in her exuberance, let slip about her own budding relationship with Kamrul. Like Irma, Lynette was excited for Yulia, insisting that Yulia tell her all the details. As they exchanged stories of their experiences, a thought crossed Yulia’s mind—it felt as if she and Lynette were sisters. At the end of the evening, Lynette promised that she, too, would keep Yulia’s secret safe from her mother. Yulia trusted her.
Lynette couldn’t understand why, but over the last few weeks, Caleb seemed to have become more and more distant. To her dismay, they spent less and less time together—he claimed to have to return home after school to help run unspecified errands for his family—and she received fewer and fewer text messages from him, until one day he broke the news to her: he was calling it quits. Disconsolate, Lynette wanted to talk things out, but Caleb ignored her. Beyond the absence of his replies, what was most mortifying to Lynette was the nonchalant way he acted in class, around their classmates, as if it were perfectly normal that they were suddenly no longer on talking terms.
Lynette was plunged into a state of devastation. Caleb’s rejection of her ripped away the last shreds of pretence she had previously swathed herself in, exposing the bitter truth that everything and everyone she had ever loved, would ever love, would eventually leave her, be forcibly taken away from her. She lost interest in everything. She barely ate. She began locking herself up in her room after school. Yulia’s attempts to make her feel better did nothing to assuage her despair.
One morning, concluding that it made no sense for her to go to school, Lynette stayed home. Her parents had already left for work, and Yulia was accompanying her brother to school. Lynette went into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. The thought of Caleb, of her mother and her father made her retch. She wanted to purge herself of it all, to rid herself of the toxicity in her life, once and for all.
When Lynette eventually stepped out of the bathroom, unable to rinse the sourness from her mouth, she saw Yulia standing there, staring at her. She knew Yulia knew. Just like before, Yulia always knew. Lynette paid no heed to her and started walking back to her room.
Yulia followed after her. “Lynette, you can’t do this. It’s very bad for you.”
“Leave me alone.”
“Yulia help you. Please, don’t do this.”
“Help me?” Lynette let out a laugh. “You know nothing.”
“Yulia know. Please, stop. If Lynette don’t stop, Yulia no choice. Yulia must tell Madam.”
“Who do you think you are? You’re just a maid! You want to tell on me? Fine, I’ll tell your Madam about your boyfriend.”
Lynette slammed the door behind her. Within the safety of her room, she collapsed to the floor, boiling with rage.
Two days later, Kamrul asked to meet Yulia at the void deck. He had something to tell her, he said. Yulia was in low spirits, and the thought of being in Kamrul’s presence sounded comforting, especially after days of cold, stony treatment from Lynette. That evening, Yulia collected the bags of garbage around the flat and made her way to the central refuse chute of the block. Before she rounded the corner, someone tapped her on the shoulder. It was Kamrul.
As they stepped into the shadows of the stairwell, a boyish grin lit up his face. He had something for her, he whispered, carefully taking her hand in his. He opened one clenched fist to reveal a thin chain, from which a small pendant in the shape of a heart hung.
Seeing no immediate reaction from her, Kamrul began mumbling. I know it’s not much, he tried to explain. Yulia shook her head. I love it, she gestured, squeezing his hand. Gently, he put the delicate chain around her neck. Then, he stepped back to admire her.
“Cantik, cantik,” he murmured, his smile widening.
She smiled back. He leaned in. She closed her eyes. He kissed her—for the first time, claiming her first. Her heart exploded in her chest.
“Oh my goodness!” A woman’s screech broke into their reverie.
Yulia turned to see Madam standing at the top of the stairway.
“So this is what you’ve been doing all this time, shamelessly meeting strange men instead of caring for the children and the flat! To think we trusted you and treated you so well, and this is how you repay us. I’ve heard so many horror stories about terrible maids, but I thought you were different, I thought you were a good one. Oh, how you’ve proven me wrong.”
The accusations from Madam pelted down in torrents. Yulia was in a daze. All at once, she felt Madam seizing her arm and forcibly dragging her away. She saw a flustered Kamrul pleading with Madam, attempting to explain that the situation wasn’t what it seemed to be. She heard herself crying and desperately begging Madam to give her a second chance, all the while knowing that this was a wish that wouldn’t be granted to her.
Lynette was scribbling in her hot pink diary when the sounds of a commotion came through the front door. She ignored it and carried on writing. Twenty minutes later, there came a knock at her door. She snapped her diary shut and shoved it into her desk drawer just as someone pushed the door open. Lynette turned to glare at the intruder. To her surprise, it was her mother.
“I’m sending Yulia home,” her mother announced.
“What?” Lynette’s scowl softened with confusion. She had planned to tell her mother about Yulia’s boyfriend later that weekend, since she hadn’t expected to have the chance to speak to her before then. “Why?”
Her mother began describing the scene she had come across earlier that evening and her outrage at what she deemed to be Yulia’s blatant breach of responsibilities. “Good thing I happened to come home early today and caught her in the act,” her mother continued. “Can you imagine how long she’s been doing this? Anyway, we’re lucky the agent can come tomorrow at such short notice.”
