Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Author’s Notes
This story deals with an unhealthy past relationship. It includes mentions of criticism and ridicule, guilt-tripping, pet theft (no animal harm or death), and sexual coercion. I have tried to treat these topics with compassion and respect and to focus the story on growth rather than trauma. If the inclusion of these topics means that this story isn’t for you, that’s okay. Take care of yourself first and foremost.
This book also includes a number of words and phrases in Spanish. Traditionally, non-English words within English works are italicized for “clarity.” I’ve chosen not to do this. This practice of italicizing has been called into question more and more recently, especially by those who feel othered seeing their languages treated as exotic or confusing. Because English is my primary language, I have chosen to listen to the voices of those who are most impacted by this practice and treat all languages equally within the text. My sole goal with this choice is to minimize harm. If you find unfamiliar words in this book—in any language!—go ahead and look them up. There’s never a wrong time to learn more about the world around us. *insert The More You Know gif here*
1
A library had never seemed so daunting.
It shouldn’t have. It’s not as if it were some massive Renaissance-Era edifice, domed and imposing. It wasn’t the New York Public Library, flanked by two stone lions acting as silent, judgmental guardians. It wasn’t even that spaceship-looking monstrosity in San Diego, all hard corners and glass walls and angular concrete supports.
No, the Ashville Public Library was a single-story brick rectangle on a quiet corner in a quiet town forty minutes outside Wichita, Kansas. That corner is where Jo Rainier stood on a Tuesday evening in late April. For nearly five minutes, she’d been staring at the front doors, psyching herself up to go inside.
“You’re being ridiculous, Jo,” she muttered to herself. “It’s going to be fine.”
A middle-aged white woman emerged from the library, paperback in hand. She had seen Jo and smiled at her on her way inside. Now, she smiled again—and then did a double take. “You lost, sweetheart?”
Jo shook her head, about to toss out an “I’m good!” before she remembered she wasn’t in California anymore. It might be rude not to give an actual answer. “No, I’m just…” She scrambled for a valid excuse. “I’m waiting until the event starts.”
The woman’s eyebrows raised with interest. “Is there a new book club or something?”
“No, it’s, um, a game night?” Jo said, twisting the statement into a question.
“Ah,” the woman replied. “Not for me, sweetie, but you have fun.” She waved like she and Jo were old friends.
Leaning on her newfound manners, Jo waved back as the woman headed toward the parking lot. “Have a lovely evening, ma’am!”
Her phone buzzed. She slid it out of her jean jacket pocket, half-hoping she was suddenly needed to cover a shift at White Hills Senior Living and Care Center, where she was the newest member of the nursing staff. No such luck. Just her calendar app with one final reminder.
MnM night
6:30 p.m. – 8:30 p.m.
Ashville Public Library
Sure enough, it was six thirty on the dot. Jo silenced her phone, took a deep breath, and finally walked into the library. She’d been here a handful of times in the three weeks since she’d moved to Kansas. Ashville’s library was tiny compared to the ones she frequented back home in Orange County, but there was a decent variety of titles and plenty of cozy spots to read. And since moving so far from home was ostensibly about saving money, she was trying really hard to borrow books instead of buying them.
Now that she’d made it into the lobby, Jo’s nerves eased. It was hard to feel anxious surrounded by that familiar old dusty-book smell. She glanced around, but there were no signs indicating where to go for the game. The flyer she’d seen on the events board hadn’t listed a specific spot either. She approached the front desk, where a young Asian American woman gave her a crooked grin. Jo had seen the librarian once or twice but had never spoken to her. She had long black hair dyed blue at the tips. Her name tag read “Leni,” and above it, she wore an enamel pin that said “Ask me what I’m reading.”
“Evening, hun. Can I help you find something?” Leni asked.
“Yes, where’s the Monsters and Mythology game happening?”
“Oh, yeah, Felix’s thing.” She pointed to a set of stairs across the lobby. Jo hadn’t been to the basement yet, though she’d noticed the stairs on her first trip to the library. It was impossible to miss the large, caution-tape-yellow sign that read “Tornado Shelter” with an arrow pointing down. She suppressed a shudder. She’d take California’s earthquakes over tornadoes any day.
“The community rooms are downstairs so that it stays quiet up here,” Leni continued. “I’m not sure which room it’s in, but it’s the only event tonight. It’ll be the room with the light on.”
“Thanks.” Jo started to turn away but paused. “What are you reading?”
Leni lit up and pointed at her pin. “Hey, it worked! I just finished a sci-fi book called A Circle of Stars about two guys trapped in an adrift spaceship who fall in love. It’s so good. We have it here if you’re interested.”
“I love sci-fi. I’ll grab it after the game,” Jo said, relaxing into a smile.
“You won’t regret it.” Leni’s grin grew even bigger and more crooked. “Tell Felix hi for me.”
Jo’s heart beat a little quicker as she started down the stairs, a strange mix of excitement and nerves flaring up. It’s going to be fine, Jo. It’s only one game.
The fluorescent light on the ceiling buzzed loudly in the quiet meeting room. Seated at an otherwise empty table, Felix Navarro double tapped his phone screen. It was six thirty-three.
