‘My ma never wanted me to become a sellsword. Even though, even though I was a “cost”, the price to pay, she loved me like any of my brothers,’ Thelonious said with a gentle chuckle, rubbing the bridge of one horn. ‘I think Pa always knew I wasn’t made for the farm though.’
Syline let out a small chuckle.
‘I don’t know, I can easily see you bailing hay and tending cattle.’ Thelonious shot her a smile, but didn’t respond, letting Amberly continue.
‘Well, when we were crossing the border into Dawnsteel’s domain, our caravan was ambushed by demons, awful stilt-legged things, claws the length of swords.’ A shuddering sigh left her, as the memories returned back to her in a swell, her pace was slowing, and the other two slowed to match her. ‘The guard did what they could to defend everyone, but I saw demons shred them like they were nothing but wet paper. Then my mother hid us under a blanket, hoping the demons would pass us by. Gods, I barely remember my father, but my mother. I’ll never forget that moment, it haunts my dreams even today. Her holding me to the bed of the cart, the smell of brimstone and blood hot in the air, as my mother told me again and again to just keep looking at her, and that it would be okay.’ She stopped walking, wiping an eye with the base of her thumb. Syline spoke up.
‘We don’t need to talk about this if it’s bringing back bad memories, Amberly.’
‘No, no, it’s fine, I’m fine, it’s just been a lot these last few days. I only really talked about this with Laes.’ She sighed. ‘It wasn’t okay though, one of the demons must have heard her, smelled her, I don’t know, but a claw went right through her back to stab into my breast. Still have the scar. It, she didn’t die right away, she hugged me close, told me to stay quiet, told me to wait. Gods, she was so brave, so strong, she knew she was dying, but told me to stay right where I was, she wanted to protect me even as she breathed her last. I did as she said, I stayed right where I was for hours, in the arms of her corpse. She was smiling, I remember that, she died hoping I’d be okay, died knowing they’d passed us by for now. Once they stabbed her, they moved on to eat other prey.’
‘She sounds like a wonderful woman, Amberly,’ Thelonious offered.
‘She was, I wish I’d gotten to know her better.’ She sighed gently. Her arms slid around herself. ‘In the end, they arrived just in time, the Dawnguard. I could hear the demons snuffling around the cart, looking for more meat. I heard one growl. I knew it had heard me crying and I saw its claws easing under the blanket. Then I heard them, their battle cry and the creature’s attention was elsewhere.’
She smiled sadly, almost wistfully, as a memory surged up.
‘When Leoric pulled the blanket off my mother and me, I nearly gutted him with her paring knife. He took me up in his arms then, told me it would all be okay, told me I was safe, that the dawn had come, and the night had fled in its path. I just cried. I’d kept myself quiet for so long, it was all I could do. I cried until I had no tears left. After that, the Dawnguard took me in. I could have been a simple priestess but well, I wanted revenge, I knew what was out there now, waiting for us in the dark, and once I had no tears left to shed, I wanted to make sure no other kid would wind up like me. Leoric was like a father to me and wanted me to follow in his footsteps, become one of the leaders of the Dawnguard but I never really fit in.’ She sighed. ‘All of them were so concerned with rules and what Soel wanted. Worship came before any real practical concern. They didn’t.’ She let out a growl. ‘To me, it always seemed like they wasted so much damn time. So many more lives could have been saved if they didn’t spend all this time with procedure and ceremony. If they did whatever had to be done to stop the demons, instead of all this posturing about purity and “ensuring we remain uncorrupted”, maybe if they wasted less time, my family would still be alive.’
Syline’s breath halted in her throat. She wanted to speak, but couldn’t bring herself to, she simply placed a hand on Amberly’s wrist. Amberly gave her a little smile, brushing her white locks behind her ear.
‘Then I met Laes, the half-devil. You saw him’ – she sighed – ‘being burned. He was everything they weren’t: witty, practical, willing to get the job done. But he was a devil, we were meant to hate each other, but I always found it easier to talk to him than any of them, even Leoric. Maybe it was always going to work out like this. But Laes.’ She bit her lip. ‘Laes cared. He saw me as a person. He knew I struggled sometimes, he knew I had nightmares, and he wouldn’t tell me to just “pray to Soel and he may shed light on the taint of your soul”. Laes would sit with me, he’d tell me “No it isn’t alright, but it’s not happening now, and now you can do something about it”. He was good to me, in a way priests just didn’t know how to be. Never thought you’d get that from a devil, huh? We’d work together when we encountered each other, everything went wrong when he and I were taking down skin-stealers who’d kidnapped a bunch of children. Apparently, one of the kids was the child of one of his warlocks. That was when Leoric and the other paladins found us together.’
‘I met him at the stocks,’ Thelonious put in. ‘Seemed like a good fellow, as far as devils go. I offered him a quicker way out, but he said he didn’t want you to burn alone.’
Amberly laughed, but it was a choked, painful thing.
‘Did he really? Gods, maybe all that flirting really had something behind it.’ She trailed off, her smile turning from sad, to an angered grimace. ‘I just wish Leoric understood. I didn’t want it to turn out like this but he’s just so damned blinded by his stupid faith, his stupid rules. I did love him, you know? He is my father, really but… he let this happen.’ She gestured vaguely. ‘Obviously the church is more important to him.’
The silence hung for several moments, Thelonious didn’t know what he could say to that, but Syline eventually cut in, breaking the uncomfortable air.
‘I’m not so sure,’ Syline offered. ‘I met him, he was organising my trip home, but at your execution, well, he was so close to acting, it looked like it was killing him to stand by. I tried to get him to act, but something in him couldn’t cross that line.’
The anger in Amberly’s eyes didn’t fade. ‘Sounds like he made up his–’
‘But he knew Thelonious and I were going to stop it, he said he’d have to stop us or he’d be betraying the church. Then did nothing to stop Thelonious knocking him out, so he couldn’t. He looked’ – Syline shrugged, the moment playing back in her mind – ‘grateful.’
Amberly looked up, confusion warring in his eyes with pain and hope. Slowly, they all turned to a grateful sorrow.
‘Idiot,’ she murmured. ‘He always was an idiot. Never could act when it really mattered.’
She wiped at her eyes, something halfway between a laugh and a sob left her.
‘Always had to have someone else take the first step. Maybe he does believe I was doing the right thing after all?’
Syline stepped close to her, holding her hand to give her comfort.
‘I would have done exactly the same thing. I don’t think you did a single thing wrong, and if Soel and the Morning’s Fury think you did, more fool them. Though’ – Syline chuckled, giving her a weak little grin – ‘maybe we’re both in this mess because the two of us think like that,’ she said with a little sigh.
‘What, like heroes?’ Amberly offered with a grin, forcing herself to perk up from the melancholy she’d fallen into.
‘Aye,’ said Thelonious as his eyes roved ahead of them. ‘I’ve never had time for knee scuffers. The church is far too up themselves. Don’t like devil lovers either, but this Laes fellow seemed more reasonable. Even if it was for his own reasons, he was still helping you save those kids.’
‘Exactly.’ Amberly sighed. She felt lost. She knew in her heart she was the one in the right and it was comforting knowing her newfound friends agreed with her on that point, but still, the church had been the basis of her life for so long. She didn’t know what she would do now that she was gone from it. She was glad for the pair of them, because it seemed like Syline had a mission all her own, finding her way home and free of those hunting her. Until it was done, it could be Amberly’s mission too. At least until then, she had a focus for her life. Something to guide her.
‘You look a lot like him, you know. Laes, I mean. You’ve got a bit of a longer face but there’s a resemblance past the red skin and horns.’
‘Is that so? Know how old he was?’
‘No, though I know hellblooded like you live a very long time, so who knows how long a true half-devil could live. Maybe he doesn’t even know. Why do you ask?’
Thelonious shrugged as he suddenly stopped walking, the two women pulling up behind him. Syline nearly walked into his back.
‘Never knew my father, my real father. Only knew my pa. If he looks like me – and you said he talks like me too, for all I know – he might be my father after all. Shame.’ He shrugged again as if reinforcing that thought didn’t overtly bother him. ‘Hey, is it just me, or have we been going down a really long time?’ He had suddenly shifted topic before Amberly could reply. The thought clicked with them as soon as he said it. Syline looked around with a newfound curiosity, having been lost in Amberly’s tale up ’til now.
‘Well, we probably don’t have to worry about any bears at this point. We’d have found them by now. I know there are a few passages to the deep elves’ subterranean home scattered around the kingdom. Maybe this is one of them?’ Syline offered.
‘Into the Sea Without Sky? I don’t think so…’ Amberly replied, looking further ahead. The tunnel seemed to suddenly drop not all too far from them, only darkness past that. It looked like that drop connected it to some other tunnels beneath, but she couldn’t see properly from this far off.
‘Think we should turn around now?’ Syline asked, looking to Thelonious, the experienced adventurer among them, for guidance.
He gave a little smile. ‘Have to admit, I’m kind of curious.’
Syline grinned a little, herself; she’d always wanted to be an adventurer. She’d grown up reading the stories of them and was the daughter of two herself, even if both of them now moved onto more “proper” professions. Out of everything they’d done so far – aside from rescuing Amberly – this felt the most… adventurous.
‘Then I’m all for it!’ she declared. ‘Maybe we’ll find a deep elf outpost, or treasure, or some kind of terrible monster. Oh, or a beautiful princess in need of saving.’
‘That last one doesn’t happen as much as it does in the books, Syline. Besides, the king doesn’t have any daughters and I think the Prince of Russenholde can probably handle himself,’ Amberly said with a little chuckle.
