Rita gives a bob of her head and gestures for Mina to enter, mean-mugging her as she steps into my office.
There’s this moment. My gaze lands on hers and joy riots through me. A weekend apart is too much because all is right with the world when we’re together. I want to rush to her, wrap her in my arms and apologize over and over for going so long without talking.
But I don’t. I will myself still until I know why she’s here. I watch as Mina closes the door and takes a seat.
Her hair is down. She looks paler than usual. Her eyes are sad and her smile is weak and my heart stutters at the sight of her.
“I’m sorry to barge in like this.” Mina tucks her hair behind her ears, tightens her hands into fists, then places them in her lap. “I know I promised I’d give you space, but there are things I need to say and I can’t wait any longer.”
She meets my eyes with so much trepidation, I feel like even more of an asshole for the distance I’ve maintained. Unless, of course, Dom was right. In that case, I’ve done exactly what I should have.
I hate myself for being this suspicious.
Why is nothing in life cut and dry and easy?
“I should have told you I was friends with Fallon,” Mina continues, her bottom lip trembling, her voice reedy and thin. “Any time in the last several weeks would have been better than letting you find out the way you did. I promise you; I wasn’t keeping the secret intentionally nor did my involvement with you have anything to do with my friendship with her.”
Her words are rehearsed. She’s nearly in tears. I hate to see her like this.
“Mina, I—” I start the sentence with no idea how to finish it, but Mina holds up her hand.
“I understand it seems that way,” she continues. “I really do. And I also understand why you think I was trying to take advantage of you. I wasn’t. I’m not. But what I need you to hear most is that I’m deeply, incredibly sorry for not being honest, especially knowing how Blossom treated you.”
I close my eyes at the parallel and Mina hurries on.
“I went to see Fallon the other day and…” She closes her eyes and huffs a laugh. “I think I met the real her for the first time. I guess I have blinders when it comes to people and their motivations. I assume the best in everyone, and I was wrong to put my trust in her. She’s not a good person and I don’t want her in my life anymore, but I made her post a clarification about you on her blog. It should go live sometime today, and I only tell you so you don’t get upset when you get the alert on your name. I figured the least I could do was tell her readers who you really are, maybe undo some of the damage to your reputation. As soon as that article goes live though, I’m officially done with Fallon fucking Mae.”
Mina holds my gaze, smiling weakly as she emulates my intonation every time I say my archenemy’s name.
I muster a weak, “Thank you,” and Mina swallows hard.
“There’s a few more reasons I came to see you today.” She ruffles in her purse and pulls out a check, places it on the table and slides it my way. “I’m returning the advance you gave me. And the extra twenty percent we agreed on for…” She drops her gaze with a sigh, then brings those soulful blues back to me. “For this whole thing?”
Her voice breaks and every instinct I have is to close the distance between us, to cup her cheeks, to hold her close…but I’m glued to my chair, still and waiting.
“I won’t be accepting the extra money,” Mina finishes. “I can’t accept it.”
I glower at the check and slide it back across the desk. “I don’t want your money.”
“It’s not mine. I shouldn’t have taken it in the first place. I like being with you, Nathan. It’s weird to be paid for it.”
A million thoughts fight for dominance, all of them conflicting. My jaw clenches while I decide which to listen to.
I swallow hard before, “I like being with you too.”
A smile warms Mina’s face. It’s the first time she’s looked like the woman I know since she walked in. “That’s gonna make what I have to say even harder. Everything we’re built on is flimsy and fake, Nathan. We flirted because we signed a contract. Because we negotiated a price on our affections.”
I huff in disgust. “I flirted because I wanted to.”
Mina lifts a brow. “At first, you flirted because you wanted to sell a story about a relationship that didn’t exist. I have to wonder; did we get so caught up in faking it that we fell for our own lies?”
“No.” The answer is simple. Powerful, and right there. I don’t have to think to find it. “I fell for you because of who you are.”
“Then why is finding out I was friends with Fallon enough to make you hide for a whole weekend? And why was knowing you’d be mad we were friends enough to keep me from telling you in the first place? Maybe we don’t trust each other as much as we should.”
I sit back with a growl.
Mina reaches across the desk to take my hand. “A man like you deserves something real and honest and true. You deserve to be with someone you trust. Someone who makes you happy. Whole.”
A man like me. Blossom’s favorite phrase. Only this time, it doesn’t feel like manipulation. It feels like a compliment.
“You made me happy.”
Mina’s practiced demeanor cracks and a river of pain ripples across her face. “Then why didn’t you call me back? Why did I have to come to you, here, at work, and force you to hear me?”
“Because I’m a petulant child.” I scoff and look away. “Is that what you want me to say?”
“No, Nathan. I’m not here to toss around blame. I’ve recently come to respect a certain measure of blunt honesty and…well…I’m just trying to be real with you. Because that’s what a good relationship needs. Real emotions. Real thoughts. Honesty in all things, even when it’s scary. Even when it might break us. Otherwise, we’re built on lies.”
I stare so long, weighing everything she says against my bullshit meter, that Mina starts to fidget. It’s endearing. And heartbreaking.
“So anyway, I guess I’ll just get to the hard part. I don’t think we should see each other until I’m financially stable. So you can trust I’m with you for you and not what I can get from you.”
“You don’t want to see me anymore?”
Mina sags, eyes sliding closed, brows drawing tight. When she meets my gaze again, it looks like her heart is breaking. “I think we need to take a break so we can unravel what was real and what was fake.”
“I don’t want to take a break.”
