My head slammed against the underside at Dad’s voice. “We didn’t expect you for Christmas.”
I hadn’t expected to be here either. When I left last week, I’d swung by the house with Victoria to pack my bag without telling Mom and Dad I was leaving. I rubbed the back of my head as I crawled out. “The client signed late last night, it made more sense to come home.”
“How long are you here?”
“Flying back on January 1.” My eyes darted into the kitchen, where Mom and Grace sliced potatoes and hummed to Christmas carols. Jean knit and Ruby perched on a stool playing with the dusty old pony I’d found in my aunt’s basement.
“Why didn’t you call us to pick you up?”
“The train station is only a mile from the hospital,” I said, which was factually accurate but dodged his real question: ‘What the hell are you doing with Grace?’
I hadn’t come home one night last week. At the time, so focused on making sure she was ok, I hadn’t considered my parents' reaction, when she asked me to stay, or when I'd gone to class with her, or when I’d been called off to work.
I definitely hadn’t thought about how to respond when Dad grilled me like he was polishing his shotgun on prom night.
“I didn’t like how I left things," I said, turning to the china cabinet for plates and glasses. Digging around in a drawer of kids’ plates and cups, I found a rag to rub off the light dust that had settled inside. Without realizing it, my attention re-focused on the women in the kitchen as Ruby spoke to my mom, who burst into laughter.
“That Ruby’s a charmer, huh?” Dad said.
I couldn’t hold back my grin. “She reminds me of Mallory at that age, always wanting to put on a show for her adoring fans.”
“I guessed I missed that,” he sighed, his shoulders slumping. I shot him a quizzical look — how could he forget her impromptu dance recitals? “I worked too much when you were kids, missed so many milestones: your first steps, Nick’s first words. Terry coached your baseball team because I couldn’t get off work. Thankfully your mom knocked sense into me to make me realize what I was missing.”
I stared at him, incredulous. I’d always thought my parents had the perfect marriage. From the moment they met, their love had seemed inevitable. Mom went to a real estate closing with one of her interior design clients at Dad’s office, and he’d been dumbstruck by her beauty, charm, and poise. He chased her out into the parking lot to beg her for a date that night, and they were married six months later.
But maybe it hadn’t been as perfect as it seemed. Had he really been absent? And what had she done to knock sense into him?
Before I had a chance to ask, he cleared his throat. “But that’s a story for another day. Let’s not ruin Christmas by rehashing all my mistakes.”
Mallory entered the kitchen, wine glass balanced between her fingers, and lit up when she saw that Grace had arrived. She pulled her into a tight hug, then Grace introduced her to Ruby.
“Rainbow Dash!” Mallory shrieked in a tipsy voice, dropping onto the stool next to Ruby.
“Santa brought me this one,” Ruby bragged, displaying her new toy. “My best friend MacKenzie’s Rainbow Dash has spikier hair.”
“Mine looked just like this. She even had a mark from when … ”
When she tapped a dent in the toy, her eyes shifted to Grace, whose lips parted as she caught my eye. My sister twisted, first surprised to see me, followed by a glare of betrayal for my theft. I nodded to Ruby. Mallory blinked twice, then grinned. “Wanna see if we have Applejack?”
When my sister held out her hand, they disappeared together to the basement. Grace’s gaze dropped to my mouth before she reached for her wine glass and responded to something Jean said.
Dad’s gaze locked on my face, eyes softened but brows furrowed. “Alexander, do you know what you’re doing?”
“Yeah, Dad. I’ll be careful.” We both looked at Grace laughing with Mom, that gorgeous smile lighting up the room. “Nick gave me advice.”
Now it was Dad’s turn to look surprised. “You and Nick are talking again?”
“Grace dared me to call him.”
I examined my fingernails to avoid Dad's eyes, remembering that morning’s conversation with my brother.
“You know there are other girls to hook up with, right?” he’d asked.
“If I wanted meaningless sex I would have stayed with Victoria.”
“You two are still doing that?”
“Not for a while." It seemed inevitable at the hotel, but I realized that while the opportunity was always there, it had been over a year since either of us had taken the initiative. Even if I had gone upstairs, she probably would have been passed out in paperwork. I would have jerked off in the shower and crashed alone.
“Good. The problem with long-term casual sex is that it rarely stays meaningless for both parties.”
“Is that why you find a new woman every month?”
“One of the many reasons,” he said smugly. “But I meant you could find someone unattached to Mallory. Download an app, buy her a drink, get it out of your system. Don’t drag Grace into your drama.”
“But I don’t want that.”
“Why? You only want what’s off-limits?”
“Being Mal’s friend only complicates it. And it’s not like we grew up with her, like Kate. That would be gross, like kissing my little sister.”
“Like Kate would lower her standards to kiss you,” he teased. “So if it’s not chasing what you can’t have … why Grace?”
“It’s not just one thing. She’s smart and funny, and she calls me on my shit but she’s also sweet, and when she laughs, it’s like …”
“Oh my gosh, you like this girl.”
“She’s impossible not to like. You should see how everyone at the hospital fawns over her.”
