She turned her attention to Rick as I left the room and shut the door behind me. Devon liked me. But would she admit it later? To me or even to herself? I didn’t know. And it wouldn’t matter anyway, because she didn’t plan on staying. She’d never said it out loud, but of course she’d leave.
I certainly wasn’t enough to make her stay. My history with women proved that the second I started something remotely serious with them, it guaranteed they’d leave town.
Mom: left.
Leighton, the girl I dated in high school: went to college out of state and never came back.
Rebecca, who I dated for two years in college: left after graduation for her career.
Grace, a preschool teacher: got a job in another state.
Allison, an accountant who planned to run a national bank by the time she was forty: took a promotion in Birmingham and didn’t look back.
Kristen, who lived in a neighboring town—see what I did there? Not local!—and ran the local library system: tapped for a job at the National Archives in D.C.
I wasn’t mad they’d all left. This was a small town and I didn’t begrudge them their careers. But when would I ever be enough?
If I were smart, I’d stop dating. But smart packed its bags the second I saw Devon at the coffee shop, blinking up at me with those baby blues.
I thought back to what Chief said, about taking the chance. Despite his meddling, he was right. There really was something there. It’d been around all those years ago, and I’d dutifully squashed it. So now, when I actually had a chance? I’d regret it if I didn’t at least try.
8
DEVON 5 MONTHS, 21 DAYS TO GO
THERE’S A LOT to be said for being waited on hand and foot by people who love you. Some of those things are even nice. But after a week of being forced to stay at my brother’s house, I was ready to crawl out of my skin.
The twins had proven their reputation as angels was more fantasy than truth, but I was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. Especially when they were standing in front of me, water guns loaded and aimed, smiling maniacally.
“Hello, my sweet loves,” I crooned, sounding ridiculous but unable to do anything about it. My ‘s’ sounds came out like ‘sh,’ so sweet sounded like shweet.
“You thirsty?” Luke started.
“We brought water!” Eva finished with a flourish.
I took in their dual blond-haired, blue-eyed expressions of helpfulness and sighed. “When was the last time those things were properly rinsed out?”
“Never,” Ceci said as she walked in. “Why in the world would you think three-year-olds are going to clean their water guns?” She turned to the kids. “Go outside and see if you can find Samson. I bet he’d like them.”
“Yeah!” Eva squealed.
Luke took off with Eva right behind him. “Samson!”
I heard the kitchen door slam shut and smiled up at Ceci. “Thank you for saving me.” I stood, happy that the movement no longer caused me brutal pain. For days, any movement that caused my blood to pump faster meant that my jaw would throb painfully. Getting a jaw wired shut was not for the weak. “And now, I’m going to beg that you drive me by the Piggly Wiggly to load up on baby food and smoothie mix, and take me home. Please. Because if I have to endure one more night of Rick’s dad jokes, I might actually die.”
Ceci laughed. “I told Rick he was being a little overbearing.”
“A little? Ceci, it’s been more than a little. I definitely needed to be here two or three days, but I’ve got this whole no-solid-foods thing down pat.”
“How’s the pain?”
“Other than an incessant need to put balm on these poor lips, I’m pain-free. Haven’t popped one of those pain pills in two days.”
Ceci nodded. “Okay. Let’s get you out of here.”
A few minutes later, my bag was packed and the kids were loaded into the back of the minivan. Samson sat on the driveway watching the proceedings, his grungy little face forlorn.
“I’m just changing venues, Samson,” I said. Stupid dog wouldn’t stop coming around, which of course had led to the twins begging their mom to keep him. I’m sure Samson would have had plenty to say about that if Ceci had relented, but she knew the dog’s deal as well as anyone.
Samson cocked his head and perked his ears.
“See ya at the house, buddy.”
He woofed as we backed down the driveway, then hopped up and took off to go who knew where, scraggly tail wagging.
It took well over an hour to make my way through the grocery store. And had it been because Ceci had decided to do her own shopping, that would have been one thing. But no. No, it was because the town gossip mill was on full alert the second I set foot into the store, and I got stopped in almost every aisle.
First, it was my English teacher from high school, asking if I still wrote poetry. (I don’t.) Then it was a lady from Gigi’s church, offering condolences about Gigi and pretending she didn’t know I wasn’t staying past the required six months. After that, there was an old classmate and an old neighbor. And all of them, every last one, looked at me with a mix of pity and curiosity, saying how sorry they’d been when Jason died, how happy they were to see me again. How were they still talking about Jason? It’d been five years.
I could practically hear Gigi taking me to task. They wouldn’t be if you’d stayed, but this is the first time they’re seeing you. What did you expect?
Which, fine. True. But even so, by the time I’d loaded up on baby food, smoothie mix, and protein powder, I was ready to empty the wine aisle of all its bottles. My chest was tight and I gripped the cart like a woman about to fall off a ledge.
As I turned the corner, I caught a glimpse of blue uniform. Aaron. My heart kicked into overdrive and I couldn’t keep the smile off my face as the uniform came into full view.
And Chief Suarez grinned in response. “Well, if that isn’t pretty enough to light up a room. Devon Rayne, as I live and breathe.”
I kept the smile frozen in place and swallowed. Served me right for getting excited and thinking it was Aaron. “Chief. I guess it was only a matter of time before I ran into you. How are you?”
