Her eyes narrowed. “Do you swear you haven’t been talking to my roommate?”
He drew an imaginary X across his chest. “Cross my heart and hope to miss your guacamole!”
At last, he coaxed the beginnings of a smile onto her face, though it faded quickly, replaced by a flash of pain as deep as his own.
“I know you mean well, but I don’t think I can handle talking about the past. At least not right now.”
Maybe if he opened up about everything that had happened, she would do the same. It would be painful, especially on the eve of the accident’s anniversary, yet worth it if he found some resolution. And maybe he would finally break through her defenses.
She’d discouraged him, but she hadn’t closed the door. And as his physical therapist could attest, Liam didn’t give up easily.
But now wasn’t the time to press.
“In that case, let’s go play in the snow and forget everything that ever happened.”
Her silver eyes crinkled at the corners with a genuine smile. “Actually, that sounds like a great idea.”
CHAPTER 11
CARLY
Turned out Bran had a gear closet that included coats, hats, and gloves in every conceivable size and color. Being cold-natured, Carly bundled up with multiple layers.
“You look like that kid from the Christmas movie,” Liam told her. “I’m not sure you’ll be able to bend with that much stuff on.”
“I’ll take the risk,” Carly said.
Though she’d secretly been worried about how Liam would get around, she shouldn’t have. He explained that he loved being outdoors in the winter, and there were more adaptations for people with paralysis than she’d ever imagined.
He was even proficient at skiing on some kind of agile sled contraption he sat on, while his hands operated a short ski-footed pole on each side. She loved the enthusiasm in his sparkling green eyes as he described the rush of flying down the slopes. Maybe meeting Liam had been providential, after all. Picturing him happy and enjoying his life would ease her mind, so she could finally let him go. She could end her pointless, juvenile crush and move on.
Then he mentioned how fun it would be for them to go skiing together someday, even though she’d told him earlier they couldn’t have a relationship. The guy didn’t dissuade easily.
But she knew they couldn’t have a future together. Though he didn’t realize it yet, both of them were haunted by the past they shared. And if that wasn’t enough to turn him off, her bald head would be. Wearing her wig and lashes was kind of like using a Hollywood filter on her pictures. She looked pretty good, but it wasn’t real. And Liam had enough baggage to carry around without being saddled with her ailment in addition.
Like every other guy, he would be shocked out of his gourd to see her without hair. She imagined he might be so nice he would swear it didn’t matter. But it would. It wasn’t like cancer treatment, where her hair loss was a temporary thing. Alopecia universalis was likely to be permanent.
Driving the snow-wheelers, as Liam called the four-wheelers with tracks for the snow, was a blast. They didn’t go too fast, so it wasn’t scary at all. They left one at the bottom of the giant hill and took the other one to the top, towing the sleds behind them. Then Carly went careening down, screaming with glee the entire way. At the bottom, she toppled over and landed in a pile of snow, laughing. Liam came down behind her, somehow steering his sled to a stop beside her.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes! That was so much fun! Let’s do it again!”
His knitted brows relaxed. “You liked it? I thought you were terrified, the way you were screaming.”
“That was me having a great time. You should try it. It’s way more fun if you scream.”
“Okay.” His expression was dubious.
“You’ll see.” Carly fetched the snow-wheeler and brought it to Liam. He looped the towropes over the hitch, and they dragged the sleds back up the long hill. Then they repeated the process of parking one vehicle at the bottom.
“It’s a lot more complicated with me along,” he said apologetically.
“True. But I’m not complaining. It gives me a great excuse to drive this fun contraption instead of trudging up that great big hill on foot.”
The answer seemed to satisfy him, and he quit apologizing. It must’ve galled a man with Liam’s pride when he had to burden others or ask for help. In the little remaining time Carly had with him, she intended to assure him he was far more of an asset than a liability.
They slid down the hill at least a dozen times, until Carly’s hooded coat was covered in snow, since she never mastered the art of stopping without a tumble.
On the last run, Liam even gave in to her request and yelled at the top of his lungs all the way down. Then Carly came down behind him and crashed into him. She knocked him onto his back and landed on top of him, both of them laughing until they had tears in their eyes.
“It’s a good thing you’re so padded.” Liam’s face was so close to hers that she could smell his minty breath. “It’s like I’ve been pummeled by a giant pillow.”
Carly rolled off onto her back, and they lay there, catching their breath. It felt so natural, lying beside him, with her head resting on his arm. She looked up at the clear blue sky and, for a moment, pretended they were just two normal young people enjoying time together.
How nice that would be.
“I could get used to this.” Liam’s mind must’ve been wandering down the same path. Except he didn’t know the impossible roadblocks they would face.
He lifted up on his elbow and gazed down at her with hooded eyes. “Thank you for doing this. You don’t realize it, but you’ve made my day a lot better, just being here.”
He looked at her like a starving man staring at a ribeye steak, fresh off the grill. Her hungry heart answered the silent plea in his eyes, wishing for things that could never be.
“Ditto,” she croaked. It was all she could manage to say, with her stomach pushing up into her throat.
What would she do if he asked to kiss her again? She had to say yes, didn’t she? After all, that was her promise to Nora... to agree to anything he asked her to do to spend time with him. And kissing definitely fell into that category.
That’s the only logical conclusion.
Surely, one innocent kiss would be okay. It didn’t oblige her to be in a future relationship. And later, when he was gone from her life forever, it would give her something to remember him by.
