When the ride is over and we are released from the seat belt, Erik has to help me walk out. My knees are jelly.
He laughs. “It wasn’t so bad, was it?”
“It was terrible!”
He laughs even more, holding my hand again even though no one we know is looking. We check our picture. It’s horrible, and Erik laughs even more at my expression in the photo—wide-open mouth and tightly closed eyes.
“I can’t post this.” I cover my face in shame.
“Come on, do you want to win the challenge or not?”
I check the notifications on my phone. There are new messages in the group.
“Oh no, look at this.” I show the screen to Erik. Chiara and Anika shared a picture a few minutes ago of the two of them in the tower we’ve just walked out of.
“Their faces look better than yours,” he says, and I push him lightly with my shoulder. “Are they here now?”
I look around as if I’m expecting to see them right behind me. “Weird coincidence,” I say, now a bit annoyed that my sacrifice was worthless.
“Not so weird, I’d say. It’s Halloween. Everyone is here. And the tower is an obvious choice when you think of ‘a wild experience’ in this city.”
“We need a selfie, at least. Come here.” I turn on the front camera and frame Erik and me with the tower in the background. He comes closer, and I take the photo. “Not good enough. More intimate. You’re my boyfriend.” I must confess, I enjoy saying those words and pretending they mean what they mean.
Erik puts a hand on my shoulder, his fingers tangling in my unruly after-free-fall hair, sending shivers down my spine. Once we have a normal smiling picture, our faces together, we take one where he kisses my cheek. My heartbeat almost goes back to the speed it reached during the free fall.
“Better,” I say and discreetly try to catch my breath. Seeing a cute picture of the two of us together doesn’t help. “Can I post it on Instagram? I mean, couples post pictures together.” That’s my rational reason. The irrational one is that I want the whole world to see how great we look together.
“Sure,” he says like he doesn’t care, and so I post the two selfies, with the caption: Halloween at Tivoli, free-falling from the Golden Tower! #wildchallenge #love #happyhalloween. Then I share the post in the group, saying, @Chiara and @Anika, the two of you beat us, but there will be a round two!😈😉
A few seconds later, Chiara writes back: OMG. Are the two of you still in Tivoli? Let’s meet up!
“Are you okay with meeting them?” I ask Erik, a part of me hoping he will say he would prefer to spend the evening alone with me, because that’s what I’d like. But I can’t refuse to meet Chiara and Anika. They are nice.
“Sure,” he says one more time, again like he doesn’t really care.
I write them back, and we meet at the bridge. We then go together to the boats, Chiara and Anika in one, and Erik and me in another.
“Thank you for doing this with me,” I say to Erik, now glad that we met with Chiara and Anika since it gave us an excuse to keep holding hands and pretending. I know it’s not the same as if it were real, but for a fleeting moment it feels like we’re actually dating.
“It’s fine, Sol.” He smiles more softly and genuinely than I’m used to seeing. I start to wonder if he is enjoying this too.
He looks relaxed, comfortable. He is in the moment, immersed in his role. When Erik is playing my boyfriend, he is confident and cheerful. He is lightning, not thunder. His deception is beautiful.
But it can’t be so deceptive. He is starting to act like that when we are alone too. When it’s just us working on the project, making some quick dinner, or cleaning the apartment to the sound of Scarlet Pleasure. His light shines through the clouds.
And he’s being bright and lively today. The way he squeezed my hand at the tower... Could it be...?
No. I can’t ask. I can’t ruin it all. Better to have fake-boyfriend-roommate-friend Erik than to not have him at all.
After the boats and a quick burger, we follow Chiara and Anika to the light show at the lake and find a spot under a beautiful tree with long ropey branches falling like a cascade over the water. From here, we have a marvelous view of the colorfully lit park, the lights reflecting on the water making me feel like I’m inside Van Gogh’s Starry Night Over the Rhône.
It’s magical, and Erik is holding my hand again. When the space starts to get crowded, Anika moves in front of Chiara, who embraces her by the waist. Erik puts me in front of him too, close to the railing, except that his hands stay on my shoulders. Still, it’s good. Really good.
When the show starts, with the waters rising, dancing, and changing colors, I feel like I’m in another world. A fantasyland. My Cinderella dream.
And as Cinderella stories go, it ends at midnight.
We won’t be apart. We’ll go back to the same home, but the magic will stay here.
I try not to focus on that. I stay in the now, letting the soothing, ethereal music touch my soul. I let the lights confuse my senses even more than they already are. I’m dancing inside like those lights. Rising to the sky and falling again, unable to settle.
“Have you guys heard of the tradition?” Anika looks at us. “When the show is about to end and all the lights are dancing at their peak, couples must kiss. It’s for luck and prosperity,” she finishes, saying this just a few seconds before the music starts escalating to its finale. “It’s now. Are you guys ready?”
She holds Chiara’s face and kisses her girlfriend. I turn to Erik, nervous. We have an audience. A large crowd packed all around us. On the other hand, it’s dark and everyone is looking at the dancing waters... Will he do it?
“For luck and prosperity?” I try.
Erik snorts and smiles shyly. He won’t do it. What was I thinking?
I’m spinning on my heels to watch the show again when he takes my arm and turns me toward him. One of his hands digs through my hair, cupping the back of my head, while the other slides along my waist and brings me closer. My palms go to his chest by instinct, and the moment I smell his skin, his candy breath, I know there is no stopping what is coming.
He brings my face toward him, and our lips meet.
At first, a soft little kiss, his wet lips savoring mine. Then a second kiss, longer, stronger, his teeth biting my lower lip with the right amount of pressure. The reactions inside me are so intense, I feel like I’ll explode. Butterflies assault my stomach when I press my mouth against his, and his smell—oh, his smell—is so delicious that I grip the nape of his neck with uncontrolled power, and he reacts by pushing his tongue into my mouth.
I melt inside. Everything in my body feels like it’s on fire. A rainbow of lights passes over my closed eyelids. A celestial song plays in the background, turning more dramatic by the second. As the light show reaches its climax, I suddenly understand why couples must kiss at this point in the show.
Erik kisses me like he means it, the symphony through the hidden speakers orchestrating the rhythm of our lips. Our intimate dance of colorful desire. His fingers trail over the back of my head and my neck, giving me goose bumps. His hand brings me closer, pressing his solid, massive torso against my small frame. I’m touching his chest over layers of winter clothing.
