She and Elias could talk about this later—and that thought was a comforting one. Maybe he’d have some insights into how boys thought that might help her navigate this in the coming weeks. And maybe just talking about it with Elias would make her feel better, too. He was just that kind of man.
The boys trudged in the side door, and Delia followed them. They sat down at the table—their usual talking spot—and she brought a plate of cookies she’d been saving for a snack today and put it into the center. None of the boys even looked at the cookies—not even Moses. Delia couldn’t help feeling a little rejected. They were obviously angry.
“Doesn’t anyone want a cookie?” Delia asked.
She was met with silence.
“All right,” Delia said, taking her seat. “Let’s talk.”
“How come you lied?” Moses demanded.
“I didn’t mean to lie, exactly,” Delia said. “I wanted you to start thinking about what it would be like for me to be seriously courted again.”
“We’ve already thought about it,” Aaron muttered. “It’s not like this would have been the first time.”
“Yah, but you’ve chased off every single man who’s tried!” Delia said. “Don’t you boys realize that you’ll grow up? You’ll get married. You’ll move away from me, and I’ll be left on my own. I’d like to have someone to grow old with.”
“You will be left on your own,” Ezekiel said. “That’s what worries us. You’ve told us all countless times that who you marry is a sober choice. Marriage is for the rest of your life. And we know we’ll move away, Mamm! That’s the problem. If you marry a man who isn’t kind to you or who doesn’t love you like he should, then you’re stuck with him for the rest of your life, and we won’t always be here to protect you.”
“Protect me?” Delia said.
“Yah,” Thomas said seriously. “We know it’s our job to keep you safe, Mamm. And you’re not so tough as you want us to believe.”
“I am too!” she retorted. “I’m your mother, and don’t you forget that I’m the parent here. You are the children.”
“We hear you cry.” Aaron’s eyes welled with tears, and his brothers fell silent.
“What?” Delia whispered.
“Late at night,” Moses said, nodding. “We hear you cry sometimes, and we promised each other that we’d never let a man make you cry—not ever.”
This time, no one shushed Moses, and her sons all looked up. Moses had struck on their main motivation, it seemed. And he’d spoken for them all. Delia sucked in a wavering breath.
“Boys...” But she felt her chin quiver then, and she shook her head. “You beautiful kinner. Do you know how much I love you?”
“Yah...” they muttered.
“Well, I do! And I know you want to keep me safe, but it really is my job to keep you safe. That’s how Gott intended it.”
“Gott also intended for men to protect women,” Ezekiel said. “And for kinner to help their parents when they get old. Like you are with Mammi.”
“I’m not old yet!” Delia protested.
“You kind of are,” Moses replied with a weak shrug, and Delia couldn’t help but laugh. Maybe to an eleven-year-old she was!
“But it’s okay, because you aren’t marrying him,” Thomas cut in. “Ezekiel talked to him, and he said Elias promised not to hurt you. I guess that was true.”
“Elias didn’t tell me that...” she murmured.
“That was between men,” Ezekiel replied. “But I can see that he was telling the truth. He couldn’t hurt you because you were never actually courting.”
“That’s true,” Delia said. They hadn’t been courting. But somehow, her heart was getting involved all the same—her lesson in proper courting not turning out as she’d expected. Maybe it never could have been so simple or straight. Maybe she should be a little more careful with her own heart!
“Here is the thing, boys,” Delia said slowly. “I want to get married again one day. I’m lonely, and when you’re older, you’ll understand what I mean by that. I’d like to have a husband to cook for again. I’d like to have a husband to stand proudly with me when your engagements are announced on Service Sunday, and to drive in the buggy with me to come visit you on a weekend. I want a companion, someone who will grow old with me. I want that.”
The boys were silent, but the tension was gone now.
“And while that won’t be Elias, I would like to find a man who I can trust to be a good stepdaet to all of you and a good husband to me. I know it’s a tall order to fill, but I’ll have to be looking seriously at what a man has to offer, and I need you four to stop chasing those men off.”
“Even if they aren’t good enough?” Aaron asked.
“I’m asking that you give them a chance, and—” She saw their gazes hardening. “Okay, how about this? If I agree that the man isn’t good enough, I’ll let you four at him.”
The boys started to smile then, and she laughed a little. “But please, stop chasing them away before I can even get to know them!”
“Just promise us that you won’t marry a man who will boss you around,” Ezekiel said.
“Or say mean things when he’s hungry and tired,” Aaron added.
“Or who doesn’t think your jokes are funny,” Moses said.
“I’ll do even better than that,” Delia said. “I won’t marry a man who isn’t good to me and good to you, too. And I won’t marry a man who won’t think you four are just as wonderful as I do. Because I couldn’t face the rest of my life with a man who didn’t see just how kind, thoughtful, talented and wonderful you boys are!”
“But what if that man makes you cry?” Thomas asked. “What then?”
“Let’s play it by ear, okay?” she said. “But I think our family could make room for a stepdaet, if he were the right man—don’t you?”
The boys squirmed, then looked at Ezekiel, who sat motionless, his lips pursed.
