I had visions of Joe on his own at the altar, jilted.
Isla shoved Maeve with her unpainted foot. ‘I knew we shouldn’t have told her.’
Maeve waved her off. ‘If Penny was about to get married –’
I intervened. ‘Unlikely.’
She nodded. ‘I agree, unlikely. But if you were about to get married, you’d have a wobble too. Change of any kind is terrifying. Ask any of my patients. Well, don’t. We have confidentiality for a reason, and that reason is so I don’t go to jail.’
‘You wouldn’t fare well in jail. Although the orange would match your new toenails.’
Isla looked stressed. ‘Guys. Do you ever shut up?’
‘No.’ I answered honestly. ‘And I’m existing on pure adrenaline at this point, so it’s probably worse than usual.’
Maeve rolled her eyes. ‘Anyway, Isla was having a wobble.’
‘It’s not that I’m scared about marrying Joe.’ Isla twisted her fingers, nail polish forgotten for a moment. ‘I’m just scared about the after. Engagement was this huge, exciting thing on the cards for so long, and I’ve loved the pre-marriage bubble, and I just don’t want that piece of paper to make us, well, boring.’
I really didn’t mean to invalidate her concerns, but I couldn’t help it. I burst out laughing.
‘Well, that is really encouraging.’ Isla’s tone was dry.
‘Sorry, sorry.’ I rested my head on her shoulder for a second. ‘It’s just that you two could never be boring.’
Maeve nodded along, solemn. ‘This is what I said. We wouldn’t let ourselves be friends with boring people. It’s a rule we have.’
‘I walked into your house the other day to meet Joe for our run and you two were skidding around the house having a NERF fight.’ It was a true story. I’d almost been taken out by a tiny blue bullet.
‘This is true.’ Isla pondered it for a second. ‘Is marriage boring?’
I thought of my parents, for whom marriage had certainly not been fun. It was the only real benchmark I had. I shot Maeve a look, willing her and her nuclear family to pick up the slack.
‘My parents still make pancakes together every Sunday. Always have. And when they walk anywhere, they hold hands and my dad swings my mum’s arm even though he knows it winds her up. Marriage is what you make it. And I’m pretty sure NERF guns are allowed through the marital door.’
Nailed it. Isla’s face lit up. ‘See? This is why female companionship was necessary. I asked Joe if he thought we were boring and he reminded me to take the bins out whilst he was at work.’
Men. With comments like that, he almost deserved to be left at the altar.
‘Isla, you’re the epitome of human sunshine. Boring runs in the opposite direction, I promise. And if it makes you feel any better, you have to take the bins out whether there’s a ring on your finger or not.’
She grinned, leaning her head on my shoulder this time. ‘And that’s why you’re my maid of honour.’
I looked over her blonde hair to Maeve, who gave me a thumbs up. Today was a day for fighting fires, and I had about ten seconds of industrial hose pipe left in me before I passed out.
29
Daniel traced a figure of eight on my forearm with his fingertips, both of us dozing in the sunlight that was streaming in from my bedroom window. I willed him to stop; my semi-conscious state a great distraction from reality. All of last night – texting him, inviting him over – had been an effort in occupying my mind with something else. It hadn’t worked for long.
‘Your coffee is going to go cold.’ He nudged my leg with his ankle. Damn it, Daniel.
I gave in and sat up, taking the mug that he held out to me. ‘Thanks.’
He’d dashed out into the kitchen in his boxers about twenty minutes ago, and I’d spent the entire duration of the kettle boiling praying to God that Maeve didn’t walk out. I wasn’t in the mood for explaining my situationship with Daniel to her, and I wasn’t convinced they’d be best friends.
‘So, what are you doing today?’ He took a big swig of his own coffee. The rules were pretty clear now between us. There was no expectation that we needed to spend the day together. Even if I did have a cool new bookshop–bar hybrid that I wanted to check out. I’d have to ask Maeve. Or Rory. Or both. Maybe not both. Eugh. I resisted the urge to bury myself back under the duvet.
‘I need to tackle my bridesmaid speech.’ I groaned. ‘The bane of my current existence.’
Probably untrue, but only because there were several things plaguing me. The speech was definitely somewhere near the top.
Behind me, I felt Daniel’s chest rumble as he laughed. ‘Ah. Wedding speeches. Modern-day Satan incarnate.’
At last. Someone who understood.
‘Rory is looking forward to it. He’s suggested a wager for who can make them laugh the most.’
As always when I mentioned him, Daniel’s expression darkened. Only for a second. ‘The man obviously cannot be trusted, then.’
I brushed off the comment, which felt slightly more loaded than he made it seem. ‘I just cannot imagine what I could say about love and marriage that would blow anyone away.’
Maybe I was building it up in my head. Maybe everyone would be too far gone to even care, and I could recite the entire script of Bee Movie and no one would even bat an eyelid. But I cared. This was Isla and Joe. It mattered.
‘Last time I had to do one, I just talked about how drunk my mate had been on the stag.’
I blinked up at him. Clearly, I was going to find no solid advice here.
‘You’re not being very helpful.’ I finished off my coffee, placing the mug down on my bedside table a little bit too hard.
