He shrugs. “Some things in life are easy. I’ve always thought the two of you would make a good business combo. And as I like to say, happy wife equals happy life. Sounds like this would make my wife happy.”
Charlotte plants a kiss on his lips, and when she breaks it, he adds, “And you can count on me to order the first glass of vino.”
My friend turns back to me with a cat-that-ate-the-canary smile and extends a hand. “Hello, new business partner. Nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you too.”
When I see Jason later that night, he gives me the most delicious congratulatory kiss.
It almost makes me forget what I wanted to say to him. “Thank you for the brilliant idea.”
He shakes his head. “No. It wasn't my idea. It was yours. It was what you wanted to do all along. All I did was remind you.”
“It was more than a reminder, but how about you remind me now of where kisses with you can lead to.”
He grins. “I can definitely remind you of that.”
And he does, all night long.
51
I take a sip of my Earl Grey, waiting for Troy’s answer.
I’m expecting a barrage of questions, since that’s his style.
But I only get one. “When can I start?”
“How’s today?”
“I’m on it. I already have a plan. I’ve been writing best man’s speeches on the side to prep for this moment. I’ll keep Sully as my second-in-command, and I’ve got another friend ready for my third groomsman, just like you had.”
“As I suspect, you’re really the best man for the job.”
He sits up straighter. “Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them. Twelfth Night.” He extends a hand. “I will bring honor to the humble profession of best man for hire.” Then he raises his arms above his head, shaking his hips. “And this means I can finally quit the pole.”
Laughing, I scratch my jaw. “I feel like that’s not Shakespeare.”
He taps his chest. “That’s one hundred percent Troy D’Angelo. By the way, you know that’s not my real name, right?”
“It’s not?”
“You couldn’t see through that?” Adopting an announcer’s tone, he says, “And now, taking the stage, the one, the only . . . Troy . . . D’Angelo.” He pronounces the last name like “dangle” with an O at the end.
“Why, yes. I can definitely see through that now. But that’s an image I’d like to unsee.”
“Me too, my friend. Me too. And thanks to you, I can be Troy Seewoster. Aspiring playwright and best man for hire extraordinaire.”
“Your real last name is Seewoster?”
“Yes.”
“Piece of advice, mate. Keep the stage name.”
He seems to consider this, then nods. “You’re right. Troy D’Angelo I shall remain.”
“How would you like to start with Zane Jarratt? He’s an X Games skateboarding star who needs an extra groomsman to match the number of bridesmaids. Some of his mates are out of town for the wedding. He’s a client of my friend, so Josh hooked me up with him, and I’ll pass him along to you instead. But wait. Can you do an Australian accent?”
“Can I do an Australian accent? I am Australian. How did you not know this?” he says in a perfect rendition of an accent from Down Under.
“Are you really?”
He laughs, shaking his head. “I’m from North Dakota. But have I impressed the man who’s always teaching others how to make an impact?”
“You have. You absolutely have.” I take another drink of my tea. Yes, my exit plan is working better than I expected.
52
Josh
The bat phone rings.
Even though it’s the middle of the night, it wakes me up instantly. This is the emergency line.
“Hey. What’s going on?”
“Dude!”
Dragging a hand through my hair, I sit up straight. “What’s up, Zane? You okay?”
