“And what do you draw?”
“Whatever comes to mind, really.”
“Interesting. When you did the piece for the Inked contest, what ‘came to your mind’?”
Uh oh.
“Erm…”
Ilian stares at me, his bright gaze intensifying. “You’re panicking again.”
“Trying to make a decision.”
“About what?”
“Whether to tell you the truth.”
Ilian leans back, assessing me. Through our bond, I know I’ve offended him as the Ithaqua values honesty.
“I would prefer that you do.”
“It’s not what you think—I wasn’t going to lie to you by any means, but rather, it’s a bit embarrassing for me. The truth, that is.”
“I’m afraid you’ve lost me, soyam. Why would you be embarrassed to tell me what you were thinking when you drew your contest piece? Are you ashamed of death?”
I wrinkle my nose. “Death?”
“Is that not what your piece is about?”
At this, I laugh. “Not at all…it’s about you.”
The man gapes like I’ve coshed him upside the skull. “Me? But why?”
I squirm, not really wanting to tell him the rest, but I also sense that he won’t let this go. “I’ve been fantasizing about you for months. The piece is about death, but ‘la petite mort’—you know, the ones I have thinking about you.”
Ilian growls, the low rumble making me jump.
“Get out!”
The words shock me, and all I can do is blink at Ilian. He’s practically vibrating in his seat, his light gray fur standing on end.
“Wh-what’s wrong?”
“Hurry, soyam, before I lose control!”
Something feral slashes across his features, a dark hungry look that boils my blood and sends heat straight to my core.
“No. I’m not going anywhere.”
Ilian glares, but I refuse to budge because even though this bond isn’t my choosing, I can’t help but need this man with every fiber of my being.
And I want him to lose control.
CHAPTER TEN
Ilian
Once upon a time, I thought Zhuliya’s contest submission was about the crossing over from one life into another.
Now, I know differently and can barely wrap my head around it.
The beautiful, evocative piece depicts death, but nothing like I thought. ‘La petite mort’—the little death—alludes to a person’s orgasmic experiences.
What Zhuliya suggests is that she loses herself when she comes…thinking of me.
Any restraint I thought I had evaporates into thin air. My mate needs to run from me now before I take her like the animal I swear I won’t be.
But am.
“Get out!”
I force the words to form because I have to warn her, but instead of running, Zhuliya stares at me with concern.
“Wh-what’s wrong?”
“Hurry, soyam, before I lose control!”
