"I know. I'm a bastard. But I'd rather see me hurt your feelings than have him break you in half—him, or anybody else."
'T love him, Chet. I want to be with him wherever he goes."
A lifetime commitment, even if their lives only last 375 another week, Kinsman thought. "Jill, you can be with him. Hell, you've been living together for the past few days, haven't you?"
"Few days?" she echoed, wide-eyed. "We're talking about a pair of lifetimes."
"You two can live together for as long as you want to," Kinsman said. "But when he brings up the idea of marriage, that gets into legal and political problems."
"Chet, you're talking like a big brother. I'm old enough to take my own risks."
He shook his head. "Don't rush things, Jill. There could be—"
"You can't stop us," she snapped.
"Yes, I can. Or Leonov could. You know that."
Clenching her tiny fists, Jill said in a barely controlled whisper, "Chet, just because you can't work out your own head well enough to make a lasting commitment to anything or anybody doesn't mean that I'm as scared and screwed-up as you are. I love Alexsei and I'm going to marry him."
"On the strength of a few days' living with him."
"We've known each other for three years, off and on. Why do you think he came up to Lunagrad?"
Kinsman actually took a step backward at this news. Jill came after him, a furious little sparrow pursuing a confused cat. "You must think I'm some brainless child that you've got to protect and watch out for. Well, if either one of us needs a keeper, Colonel Kinsman, it's you! You haven't got the brains to realize when somebody loves you. But I do! And I'm going to enjoy his love as fully as I can. Understand that, big brother!"
Suddenly Kinsman found himself laughing. "Okay, okay," he said, putting up his hands as if to fend her off. "So I'm a suspicious bastard."
"You're an idiot."
"That too."
"And, and . . ."
"I'm trying to protect you." he offered.
"I'll protect myself, thank you. And if what you think is true, I'd rather face it than spend one minute less with Alexsei than I need to."
"Okay," Kinsman said. "Message received and under- stood."
