NO!

I meant … walk away, head held high, and never think of him again, because he didn’t deserve someone like me. Yes. That’s what Grace had said.

I packed my outfit carefully in my bag. I never folded anything, but today was special. Today required folding. Today was a gooood day. This morning I’d finally had a breakthrough with a venue for Grampy G’s party. The yurt place had said it was looking possible and I should give them a ring and confirm tomorrow morning. FINALLY. In the nick of time, we had a venue! Tomorrow I could tell Grace the new plan and let the guests know.

My phone lit up. Who was messaging me at 8 a.m. on a Saturday?

Ru: London says hi…

I grinned.

“Did Dad send you another picture of his big toe hair?” Billy asked innocently. She was the cutest.

“Even better.”

It was the view from Ru’s room. A perfect snapshot of lights down an empty Carnaby Street, a huge Christmas tree at the end and … humble brag much!?

Fine. Two could play that game.

Me: So does Bromster.

I snapped the view from my window. Cute cottages with every window decorated, our village green with tiny Christmas trees dotted about, the village lights designed by the primary school kids … oops … and Mum in her dressing gown, inspecting the herd of mini reindeer which had now inched all the way to our front door. Hope he didn’t realize they were ours.

Ru: Hell-oooo! You didn’t tell me you lived in Sleigh Another Day.

Me: You didn’t tell me you’d seen it?!

Ru: That’s cos I haven’t. But tell me I’m wrong?!

But Mum was beeping Cara’s horn and I’d been so busy doing motivational speeches in the mirror, I’d failed to actually get changed. Or showered. I was just going to have to travel down in my Christmas pudding PJs and matching slippers and get ready in our hotel. Mr W had given the slippers to me and Grace as a thank you for all the money we’d been raising for Holly Hospice. With the auction we were up to almost one thousand five hundred pounds, and it was closing this afternoon just in time for the meet and greet tonight!

Much to Billy’s delight, I took her up on the offer of her dressing gown after all, threw my suitcase in the boot and jumped in the front seat. Mum gave me a proud look. What had I done?

“Well, doesn’t my middle daughter just look perfect for her ‘friend’.”

Shudder. For days now she’d been using air quotes whenever she said “friend”.

I stared out my window, already feeling sick with nerves. I wished Grace was travelling down with us, not catching the train tomorrow after dancing. Trying to calm myself, I ran through the plan we’d made.

•2 p.m.: Arrive at hotel

•3–5 p.m.: Unpack, destress, listen to calming rain sounds, get ready, motivational mirror talks

•5 p.m.: Meet Ru at hotel – calm, relaxed and full of excellent chat (or ready to look at list of excellent chat ideas)

Perfect. And the long journey meant time to work on the conversation topics Grace and I had come up with last night. I looked in my notepad.

•Is American school like on Netflix?

•Best festive thing he’s seen in the UK so far?

•Do you love Molly?

•What do his parents actually do? (**good chance to bring up The Brussel Shouts???)

•Do you want to kiss Molly in Trafalgar Square, hopefully in the snow? It would make Grace really happy. No pressure.

I had to not let Grace’s suggestions get lodged in my brain in case they popped out.

It was weird. Ru and I had hung out loads. But today felt different. Could I really do this?!

But we were off. Mum was pulling out of the drive, Cara’s outside lights flashing and Santa FM blaring. And, for once, I didn’t mind. Who cared who saw? Everyone was already laughing at me anyway. And I was off to London. All expenses paid. Mum was drumming on the steering wheel. Billy was singing all the wrong words to Christmas songs. And Cara was packed with festive snacks.

Even Elijah had been really happy when I asked if we could come after all. I was expecting some really big condition, but he said he had spare hotel rooms and all I needed to do was come down to the final influencer event on Sunday. I really didn’t get that guy.

But as we turned towards to the motorway, Mum glanced at me. “Shall I?”

I looked to where she was pointing. Eurgh. Simon. Hand in hand with a girl – not even the girl we saw him with the other day. Simon who had bragged about putting me forward for the end of year show. I gave a small nod – and Mum let rip with Cara’s horn. Simon positively leapt into a slushy brown puddle. I laughed even harder when Mum wound down the window and yelled, “Behave your elf!”

Oh well. Christmas karma.

I gave him a merry little wave just as my phone vibrated.

Ru: Got to switch my phone off.

Ru: Still on for five? I’ll bring the hot drinks.

I typed back, a stupid smile on my face.

Me: Plan

I’d become a gooey Christmas cheese ball.

And … I kind of liked it.

I stretched back and cranked up “All I Want for Christmas”, the three of us belting it out. Who cared if everyone at school thought I was an elf? Or was related to singing Christmas dinner and half-horse-half-human sister?

I had Grace. I had my family.

And it had just started snowing just like in the movies. I grinned. After all these years, maybe this is what it felt like for my Christmas frost to thaw.

And an hour into the journey, Grace messaged with the best news. The auction had hit two thousand pounds!! I rang her immediately, but no answer.

I sent a voice note of the three of us screaming.

Which I had to follow up with one explaining we hadn’t been in a crash.

Today was the best!