We all stood around her, and I have to say I was worried about Harriet. This spray Gran had applied to her clearly didn’t work as advertised. First of all, it said that it wasn’t harmful for humans and pets, but that obviously wasn’t the case. And secondly, it seemed to make pests increase in number instead of get rid of them, so that was a double failure in my book.

“Maybe the spray is making the germs inside you proliferate,” I said.

“You think?” asked Harriet, who had collapsed on the floor now and looked too weak to stand on her own four feet.

“Let’s call the vet,” I said.

“But how?” asked Kingman.

“Leave that to me,” I said determinedly. And I hurried off through the string curtain designed to keep flies out, and through the store, weaving my way through the legs of Wilbur’s customers and out the door. As I did, suddenly I thought I recognized two of Wilbur’s customers. They were… Johnny and Jerry! Only they were wearing disguises. Both had donned wigs and mustaches, but that didn’t fool me. Another good reason to tell Odelia she had to hurry over.

I made it to the Gazette offices in record time and sped through the door of my human’s office, a little out of breath but otherwise still capable of crying out, “It’s Harriet, Odelia. She’s sick again! And also, Johnny and Jerry are at the General Store!”

Odelia didn’t waste time asking a ton of questions. Instead, she grabbed her phone and followed me out. And as she did, she put a call to her husband and also to Vena to meet her at the General Store. Then she picked me up and ran all the way over to the store without delay.

“Vena gave her something,” she said. “But clearly it wasn’t strong enough.”

“Whoever made that bug spray should be in jail,” I said.

“That’s convenient, because they already are in jail. For the murder of Prince Abdullah.”

She slammed into the store and her eyes scanned the crowd until they landed on the figures of Johnny and Jerry. The moment they saw her, they instantly turned around and escaped in the direction of the back of the store, through that same fly curtain and into Wilbur’s private space.

“Hey!” said Wilbur. “That’s private!”

But the two crooks didn’t care. And as we hurried after them, we saw that they had already come and gone.

Harriet, Brutus, Dooley, and Kingman, still on the floor, pointed to the back. “They left that way,” said Kingman.

Odelia and I hurried over in that direction and saw that the crooks were trying to clamber over the wall that backed Wilbur’s small garden. They weren’t having a lot of luck, though, and I saw that Johnny’s mustache had fallen off his face and Jerry’s wig had fallen off his head.

“Stop right there!” Odelia yelled. “You’re both under arrest!”

“Not again!” said Johnny as he gave up trying to climb that wall. His partner in crime was on top of the wall, and had a tough decision to make: to leave his partner behind, or get caught along with him. Finally, he decided that he couldn’t leave his buddy in the lurch and jumped back down. Both men raised their hands.

“Hi, Odelia,” said Jerry pleasantly. “Nice to see you again. How are things?”

“Things are fine,” said Odelia. “Don’t move, all right?”

“And how is Grace? Growing into a fine young lady?”

“We met your cats last night,” said Johnny. “They got into our van. I dropped them off at the house.”

“Yeah, I saw that,” she said, not as friendly as the two crooks may have liked. She glanced nervously behind her, eager for the cavalry to arrive.

“We keep meeting like this,” said Jerry. “Not that I’m complaining.”

“It’s fun to catch up with old friends,” Johnny pointed out.

“Maybe we could all sit down for dinner one time? You and Marge and your grandma. I would like that.”

“Me too,” said Johnny. “I would like that very much.”

“How is your mom?”

“My mom is fine,” said Odelia curtly.

“I like Marge,” said Johnny warmly. “She’s great.”

“I also like Marge,” said Jerry. “What a lady.”

“What a woman,” Johnny concurred. “If I wasn’t married, and she wasn’t married…” He thought for a moment. “I mean, I’m not married, but if she wasn’t married…” He seemed to have lost the thread of his argument. “What would you do if Marge wasn’t married, Jer?”

“I would take her out to dinner for sure,” said Jerry.

“But I would like to take her out to dinner,” said Johnny.

“We could both take her out to dinner,” Jerry suggested.

“And let the best man win?”

“Something like that. Though of course she would choose me.”

“I think she would choose me,” said Johnny.

“Obviously she would choose me,” said Jerry.

Johnny’s bonhomous mood turned. “And I’m telling you she would choose me!”

“No, she would choose me!”

“She would choose neither of you,” said Odelia, settling the matter. “Because she’s already married, remember?”

“Oh,” said Johnny. “I forgot about that.”

“Why did you try to shoot Rogelio Hartshorn?” asked Odelia, figuring that now that the men were in such a talkative mood she might as well ask the question.

Johnny shrugged. “Who’s Rogelio Hartshorn?”

“The man you tried to shoot yesterday.”

“Oh, that guy. I didn’t even know his name was Rogelio Hartshorn.”

“I knew,” said Jerry.

“That’s because you’re in charge of admin, Jer,” Johnny reminded him.

“Can I lower my arms now?” asked Jerry. “They’re getting tired.”