Amara could not help me. No one could. No one would ever understand, when not even I understood myself.

I gathered all my strength to put my mask back on and looked at Amara, ready to find any excuse for this whole mess in my room, but Ivy was faster.

“She said to me that university was too stressful for her, and then she moved the fish tank.”

My heart had stopped because Ivy might as well have told them the truth.

Amara eyed me, then my neck. Finally, she looked around and spotted my pendant in a puddle of water. It was still whole, but the inside was a bit splintered and the silver chain was broken.

Amara bent down, picked it up and put the silver chain around my neck. I felt her melting the metal on my neck. Instantly, I felt trapped. And the feeling wasn’t that wrong. I was trapped in a cage of obligations in a dark city full of hostility, and there was not a single way out of here.

Whatever had just happened, I would talk to Ivy, that she kept quiet, and the only thing I could hope was that it wouldn’t happen again.

Chapter 38

Julian

The rain pelted against my window pane as if it wanted me to stop playing, and when a fat raven finally flew against the window, slid down, and left a disgusting grease stain on the glass, I flipped the lid of the piano key closed in annoyance.

I had made too many mistakes today anyway, and I didn’t just mean the wrong key combinations while playing.

I looked through the dirty window.

She was still sitting there, curled up like a baby animal in need of help. Her cheeks glowed red, surely from all the tears she had shed until a few minutes ago. Her shoulder-length hair was all messed up as she kept tussling it with her hands.

Bay stared into nothingness, though I was pretty sure she knew of my presence. But recent events had to be getting to her. Her mother, the environment, this whole damn town...

In any case, I wouldn’t have felt any differently if I had been taken to a completely strange environment, to a place teeming with dark creatures whose existence I had only heard about in fairy tales up to that point.

I thoughtfully pushed myself off the piano to stand up.

We were all so fucked up in this stupid system, and I could very much understand Ms. Adam’s decision to keep Bay in the dark about her origins. I would have done the same, but I wouldn’t even let it get that far. Children did not belong in such a world. And even less of my kind.

I looked over at Bay again.

I felt sorry for her, sitting there, completely confused. And at that moment I realized who was really to blame for her unpleasant circumstances.

Damn it, I should have kept my mouth shut, and Grace and Julie could have just let her forget.

I remembered the fear I had felt yesterday – fear that something was going to happen to her. But it had all been so unnatural. Then there had been the headache and the brief collapse at Alarik’s and finally, the second time at the witches’ room. Something was wrong with me, and it had nothing to do with my control this time.

Two hours ago, I had drunk another portion of burning wolfsbane, because it was not long until the full moon. My body was going crazy. The transformation was threatening to set in, as it always did, and as soon as I looked in the mirror, my eyes lit up, and veins popped out everywhere. The reason why Senseque stayed home these days each month and kept away from humans.

I sucked in a sharp breath and wanted to go downstairs to the kitchen to Dad and Mia, but something unexplainable stopped me.

I turned to the window.

After that move of mine, I couldn’t just leave her sitting there.

An idea came to me, and I went to my desk.

A minute later I was back at the window, paper in my hand.

I waved my other one and Bay immediately looked up, her expression surprised, as if I had snapped her out of her daydreams.

She was wearing a blue hoodie that was a little too big for her, making her look even more crumpled.

I held up the paper I had written Hey on with a black marker, hoping I didn’t completely put my foot in my mouth and embarrass myself.

She looked at me blankly for a while, then looked up at the ceiling, leaning her head against her bookshelf.

Crap. I really wasn’t good at cheering other people up. However, I couldn’t give up now either.

Determined, I pulled out the marker, and drew a smiley face on the back and pressed it to the window.

Bayla looked at me, annoyed, and pulled the curtain closed.

That had really backfired.

I took another sheet and wrote Please respond if you’re not uncool, and held it up to the window. I was sure she could see me.

The curtain didn’t move.

Just as I was about to give up, a note appeared on her window.

I had to stifle a grin as I read Leave me alone, Julian.

That was progress, if only a little.

Her handwriting was even more scrawly than mine, but I could read it.

How are you? I wrote quickly.

I’m not in the mood for small talk. Came the next sign, Bay still not to be seen.

Me neither 😊

She ripped the curtain away and rolled her eyes.

Jackpot.

I couldn’t suppress the grin anymore, but tried to keep it in check, because I didn’t want her to close the curtain again.

She slapped the next note roughly against the window so I could hear it.

Don’t you have any other neighbors to annoy?

The corners of my mouth continued to move upward.